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Old 13-04-2011, 01:05 PM   #1
Buttons.
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Contains abuse - JodiE/MeaCulpa needs your support

JodiE might just need some hugs and love and stuff at the moment. Lets show her how much we love her and are here for her :)


Last edited by Buttons. : 13-04-2011 at 01:17 PM.


'Never forget what you are. The rest of the world will not. Wear it like armor, and it can never be used to hurt you.'

['There is only one thing we say to death. Not today'.']

'We are each our own devil, and we make this world our hell.’ – Oscar Wilde
‘It’s hard to dance with the devil on your back.’ Sydney Carter


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Old 13-04-2011, 01:10 PM   #2
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Jodieeeee.

I love you bundles and bundles, and I know many members here do also. You're such a caring and beautiful person. I hope you're okay, please know you can talk to us if you need to. I'll be keeping you in my thoughts and hoping if you need to, you can lean on us. Please reach out for support if you need too.

Aimee
xxx

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Old 13-04-2011, 01:15 PM   #3
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JodiE has given me permission to tell you what happened to make things so hard. Basically myself and her had some sexual encounters (which was fine) but we also invited a guy up to the same room, whom JodiE did things with that she feels perfectly comfortable with. However then he left the room and I fell asleep. While I was sleep he came back and forced himself into JodiE. She said no and he kept having sex with her. Only after she had repeated it a few times did he withdraw and even then he stayed for hours talking. I took her to get the morning after pill and checks but she's struggling to figure out whose to blame and with feelings of being dirty and unclean. She has subsequently overdosed.



'Never forget what you are. The rest of the world will not. Wear it like armor, and it can never be used to hurt you.'

['There is only one thing we say to death. Not today'.']

'We are each our own devil, and we make this world our hell.’ – Oscar Wilde
‘It’s hard to dance with the devil on your back.’ Sydney Carter


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Old 13-04-2011, 01:46 PM   #4
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Jodie, that sounds horrible for you. The guy is to blame in this, definitely not you. You said no and he should have respected that. Please let your friends help you through this, and reach out when you need to.

Katy, I'm glad you were/are looking after her, and try to make sure you are looking after yourself too.

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Old 13-04-2011, 01:54 PM   #5
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Jodie, I'm sorry that happened to you. It isn't your fault. Katy, I'm glad that you were/are with her. Take care of both of you.



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Old 13-04-2011, 01:57 PM   #6
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It is my fault.

I shouldn't have agreed to do other stuff in the first place. I was drunk. I took my clothes off. I got what I deserved.




Imperfection is underrated.



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Old 13-04-2011, 02:00 PM   #7
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What you did beforehand (which you were comfortable with?) is completely separate to what happened after. No one should force themselves on you.

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Old 13-04-2011, 02:34 PM   #8
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What the bloke did the 2nd time was wrong, it's him that is to blame; it wasn't your fault and you certainly did not deserve to have that happen to you.



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Sefka is my RYL Sis

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Old 13-04-2011, 02:40 PM   #9
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I don't really have many words Jodie but I just wanted to give you some love. What happened to you most definitely wasn't your fault so try and take the blame away from yourself. Whatever happened beforehand, has nothing to do with what he did afterwards.

Take good care of yourself, sweet.
x

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Old 13-04-2011, 02:44 PM   #10
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My therapist used the 'r' word





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Old 13-04-2011, 03:05 PM   #11
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Apart from your fear of the 'r' word, has talking to your therapist helped?

Like others said, what happened afterwards was definitely not your fault. If the guy hadn't forced himself on you the second time then nothing would have happened, so it couldn't possibly be your fault.

Take care.



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Old 13-04-2011, 03:05 PM   #12
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Jodie.. *offers safe hugs*

What he did is in no way your fault, at all. He should have listened to you when you said no, even if you had been doing stuff before hand. No matter what, it's your choice. If you don't want to do stuff that choice should be respected. He's the disgusting one in this, not you. I promise.

What your therapist said is right, but if you don't like looking at it that way, then you don't have to. How it effects you is more important than the label.

And Katy, make sure your looking after yourself too.

Love you Jodie, please be careful.








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Old 13-04-2011, 03:09 PM   #13
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It can't have been.... that. That word if for people who have been really hurt, not for people who probably asked for it :(

Last time... with my 'grandfather'.... I got told I shouldn't dress in shorts and strappy tops because my body affects me. It's my fault. If I hadn't shown my body...

I want to make it go away. Cut it off starve it off. I don't want anyone to look at my sexually. I feel sick. I was sick last night after nightmares. So I took too many sleeping pills to make it go away. And I still feel disgusting and dirty.




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Old 13-04-2011, 03:25 PM   #14
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but you didnt ask for it. you said no and that is the importain thing. If you say no and he keeps going then that is the 'r word'.
sorry you feel so horrible.
*offers safe hugs*




'Fix me. Fix my head. Fix me please. I don't wanna be dead.
Someday. I'll feel no pain. Someday. I won't have a brain.They'll take away the part that hurts. And let the rest remain.'

'That gun is loaded but it's not in my hand'




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Old 13-04-2011, 03:28 PM   #15
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Jodie, it is NOT your fault and no matter what you did you didin't 'ask for it'.

You said no which he should have respected and stopped straightaway. Everyone is entitled to change their mind and any point and anyone with any decency would stop.

Take care.

Katy - look after yourself as well

xx





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Old 13-04-2011, 03:37 PM   #16
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Hugs Jodie it wasnt your fault hugsxx

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Old 13-04-2011, 04:35 PM   #17
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I'm out viewing houses and I think people are staring at me. I feel like I look like some worthless piece of meat only good to be used.




Imperfection is underrated.



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Old 13-04-2011, 07:15 PM   #18
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Jodie sweetheart, I'm really sorry I can't offer more than all my love and mahoosive cuddles right now. I just want to echo what the others have said....xx




The only time you will find real light is when you're searching in the dark..


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Old 13-04-2011, 08:30 PM   #19
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Not your fault. If it was anyone's it was mine for not protecting you/putting you in harms way.

I know you can feel exposed even after things like that have happened but that is usually down to hypersensitivity which ensues after a traumatic event (look it up if you don't know what it is), not people actually looking at you.

Has your therapist been helpful?



'Never forget what you are. The rest of the world will not. Wear it like armor, and it can never be used to hurt you.'

['There is only one thing we say to death. Not today'.']

'We are each our own devil, and we make this world our hell.’ – Oscar Wilde
‘It’s hard to dance with the devil on your back.’ Sydney Carter


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Old 13-04-2011, 08:53 PM   #20
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Oh gosh, Jod, I'm so sorry... I'm here for you, always. I love you so much...
xxx



In a world where you can be anything, be yourself.






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