Well I think Ruin had things about it that were unique, and they didn't really translate to later versions fully intact. It was a lot more "exploration" oriented and not as muffled. Members were extremely protective of the site, and anyone having a go at it caught hell from mobs (thats mobs and not mods - mods hardly had to do anything to protect site that way). People were really young and could be very searching. They could also be very funny. I read some of the most amazing writing from people. It could be a dark place but it made the light show more. There were even triggering photos kept on site and they actually scared some people so much they got better.
There was a real camaraderie between people there. Many people knew each other in real life and that carried over. There are studies that show people get helped more by some peers than pros and I saw that. I used to see people get better all the time.
I recall one girl who had struggled and wrote about her angst over her parents finding out about her problems. Her father - instead of being mad - went and apologised to her for not being who he should have been. The girl's life changed on the spot - she was free. She wrote about it all really well and it still stays with me. The place had the drama of young people shattering unexpectedly, and then putting the pieces back together in better ways. People can find some dark places unexpectedly but they can find some bright ones even quicker. I saw so many fine people - I never considered most of them as "flawed" etc etc in any way
Of course Harley was very driven and had people volunteering for all sorts of things so people felt engaged. As the place grew and got notice in BBC, C4 etc. people who felt stuck then felt something around them growing positively and dynamically.
I also miss MSN. Having multiple MSN convos open while talking to people around the world was just amazing even though my typing then was really awful lol
Last edited by Isoverity : 26-05-2019 at 07:23 AM.
Mainly I miss the sense of community and friendship. I could log on and there would be 20 others online at the same time that I knew well and we could chat for hours, spam threads (Esther's Queendom for example) and support each other. Then a few times over the summer we'd meet up in London or Essex and lark about. There was such a sense of belonging. We may all have been struggling but we helped each other too. Not like on Instagram now where most people with MH issues and ED like to post. It's a very toxic community, I see the sorts of things that happens, the awful anonymous messages left on tellonym etc. Such a shame.
Isnt it funny how day by day nothing changes but when you look back, everything is different
you once called your brain a hard drive, well say hello to the virus.
Totally agree it's a massive shame about anonymous messages. I wish the younger lot didn't use them but I think it's part of the culture. Just seems as though people should be held accountable for things they say. I try to believe it's only a small number of people who leave the large amount of 'hateful' messages but it seems so dangerous. Just had to comment on that because it's something I feel strongly about!
In terms of RYL, I didn't join until 2008, which is arguably after the 'peak', but I miss it being busy and the diversity of opinions and replies. I hope that people who have left have gone on to have largely more stable lives. It's been nice to see how the regulars who are still here today have developed and grown as well.
I miss someone being there 24/7. If you posted at 2 am UK time asking for support you would get a response. Many a time I felt like harming myself in the early hours in the past and people posting stopped me from doing it. These days if it's past 10 PM UK time you dont tend to get an response and if anyone is online at say 2 am it doesn't guarantee that they will see your thread or know what to say.
Wannabe CPN : -)
"He who is tired of Weird Al is tired of life." - Homer Simpson "I hear those voices that will not be drowned" Sanity is a nasty disease. The world would be a happier place without it. - Rilic
RIP Kat 4th July 1987- 11th June 2013
I also miss MSN. Having multiple MSN convos open while talking to people around the world was just amazing even though my typing then was really awful lol
Ah MSN. We had some good old chats on MSN. I miss it. Facebook etc isn't the same.
Quote:
Originally Posted by sherlock holmes
Mainly I miss the sense of community and friendship. I could log on and there would be 20 others online at the same time that I knew well and we could chat for hours, spam threads (Esther's Queendom for example) and support each other. Then a few times over the summer we'd meet up in London or Essex and lark about. There was such a sense of belonging. We may all have been struggling but we helped each other too. Not like on Instagram now where most people with MH issues and ED like to post. It's a very toxic community, I see the sorts of things that happens, the awful anonymous messages left on tellonym etc. Such a shame.
This. Instagram and the like seem so public and open. I know any one can read these posts too but it feels different.
I miss the little group of Esther's Queendom regulars. It was such a good distraction help at any time of day.
Mainly I miss the sense of community and friendship. I could log on and there would be 20 others online at the same time that I knew well and we could chat for hours, spam threads (Esther's Queendom for example) and support each other. Then a few times over the summer we'd meet up in London or Essex and lark about. There was such a sense of belonging. We may all have been struggling but we helped each other too. Not like on Instagram now where most people with MH issues and ED like to post. It's a very toxic community, I see the sorts of things that happens, the awful anonymous messages left on tellonym etc. Such a shame.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Blindspot..
Ah MSN. We had some good old chats on MSN. I miss it. Facebook etc isn't the same.
This. Instagram and the like seem so public and open. I know any one can read these posts too but it feels different.
I miss the little group of Esther's Queendom regulars. It was such a good distraction help at any time of day.
Both of these.
I miss the sense of community, the giving and receiving of support and how active and vibrant it was, even if it was dark/heartbreaking/stressful too. I went to loads of meet ups and made a lot of friends here, some I still have. I racked up over 20,000 posts and spent christ knows how many hours of my life on these forums and talking to members on MSN. I'm still pretty gutted that I felt like I had to give it up when it became a less safe space for me. I practically grew up here - this place made up a huge amount of my life when I was younger, and it'll always be an important part of my history.
Also, hi lovely humans. I've not been here in a bloody while. I hope you're all getting by.
I'm plodding on, you know how it is. Working full time and living in a flatshare. I have started seeing a private therapist in the last couple of months who I really like and I actually feel like I have some autonomy and can see the potential for actual change (fingers crossed...), which is refreshing!
I miss the community! I miss being young and having time to be on here at all hours of the day!
I miss the sheer randomness of this place!
When we lose twenty pounds... we may be losing the twenty best pounds we have! We may be losing the pounds that contain our genius, our humanity, our love and honesty. ~Woody Allen
Is a chocolate muffin loving glitter ball
How are you getting on?
