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Old 07-01-2009, 09:20 AM   #1
platinumangel92's Avatar
Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: Braintree
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Triggering (SI/Suicide) - Why does it have to happen?

I don't know what to do anymore. I met this guy called Chris nearly a whole year ago and I really fancied him - which started to turn into falling in love with him. He was always so sweet and caring to me.....but once I gave him my number he started sending me personal texts about sex and stuff - I felt really uncomfortable but I only agreed to do it because I thought he liked me too. Then it got really out of hand when he sarted asking for pictures of me naked and videos of me masturbating. If I didn't want to do it, he'd make me feel guilty. Eventually, everyone found out that me and him were having text sex but when he was confronted about it, he called me a liar and said that he lost his phone. Now we aren't friends no more we are always at each necks about it - he told everyone that ever since the day he met me all I've done to him was cause him agro but he didn't know that my Uncle read the texts and then everytime we were alone he'd try to tear my clothes off demanding a picture of me naked. Last night me and Chris had a major argument where he told me that he faked the friendship and how he didn't care about me - he thought i was untrustworthy and said that everything i say are lies. I've been feeling depressed and suicidal for weeks now; contemplating self harming and he happened to have triggered it last night. I'm sitting here in the classroom with a bandage wrapped around my wrist like a chain and I feel that although I hate the way he has treated me like a whore, I still have strong, passionate feelings for him. I told him how much I fancy him and he just ignored me. It makes it worse to know that everyday I go into school I walk past him, my heart beating so fast I'm scared it's gona fling out of my chest - he sits behind me in business studies and I always feel so uncomfortable but so safe as well. I want all this argueing to end but I don't know how to tell him to stop and leave me alone. He says that all this is my fault and that the only person I should feel sorry for is myself but I dunno who to blame anymore. Please help me I need to know how to tell him to leave me alone from now on before my heart gets broken again.

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Old 07-01-2009, 02:10 PM   #2
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I think that he is, quite frankly, bang out of order.
Even though he 'treats you like a whore' you would still love him, if you loved him before he started, because love is a silly thing, and you cant help loving someone, even if they are mean.
Im not really sure how to help, but is there any way you could tell yourself that hes no good for you, and that you dont like him?
aybe if you tell yourself enough you dont like him, you will start to feel like you dont.
(and none of thi is your fault!!)

Ralph wept for the end of innocence, the darkness of man's heart, and the fall through the air of a true, wise friend called Piggy.
If we dont get home soon, we'll be barmy..

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Old 08-01-2009, 03:09 PM   #3
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Sweetie he is really out of order
It is not your fault but what he has done is wrong and you need to make sure people know because even if you still like him and care about him he shouldn't be allowed to get away with it or do it to anyone else.
I know its hard because you have strong feelings for him but he isn't worth it, he is not a good person and not the type of person you need around you.
Take care of yourself love and feel free to pm me if you need anything

You're entirely bonkers. But I'll tell you a secret. All the best people are.

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Old 08-01-2009, 03:15 PM   #4
I am so in love with my gf
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babe i think he was using u for his plesure u need to frget about him ok dont beat your self up over it ok
take care

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