for all you out there willing to take some time, i'd like to hear yo're thoughts.
what do you all think of people talking about their self harm on social networking sites like facebook? in a "oh I hate myself, i cut myself again...."etc way, not nessesarily supportive and for awareness reasons?
do you think its appropriate?
cause i have a friend who does, and im always kinda apalled when i see that, because i would never be able to be so open about it, but also that...maybe that sint the most appropriate place to say that?
what do you all think?
I guess it depends on your friendship circle. I sometimes talk about feeling really low, and why, as I know I have friends [I only have a few select friends of those who I really know] who will reach back and offer words of kindness.
I kind of think, well thats not the most helpful thing to do, for them or anyone else, but maybe they're just trying to deal in the best way they can. Ive never known anyone who does that
He was no longer jean valjean but no. 24601 -les miserable
Some of life's mysteries will never be solved, such as why, after spending an entire evening listenong to Bach, do I find myself humming "the birdie song".......
I am reaching, but i fall, and the stars are black and cold, as i stare into the void of a world that cannot hold- les miserables
I personally don't think it's appropriate, as social networking sites aren't meant for that sort of thing, and it could potentially be triggering to others - whereas a website like RYL (where it's known there could be triggers and that this is a safe place to vent about that stuff) are more appropriate places for that. It suggests attention-seeking to me and also takes away the choice of other people on Facebook: they might not want to read it!
yeah that was sort of what I was thinking too, that it might disturb people who aren't aware/prepared to read that. and i just feel like she's lookign for help/attention somewhere where she probably isn't going to find it (her friends list is in the 400's.....hardly "close friends only")
i had a friend doing that sort of post last year over a terrible exam result, i wasn't self harming at the time but everyone took offence to it as she did it in a mocking way, it if ppl like that, that give people like us who actually do struggle with self harm a bad reputation of attention seekers and so on
Some infinities are bigger than other infinities.
You don't get to choose if you get hurt in this world, old man, but you do have some say in who hurts you.
I am running the show. Everyone is waiting for me. I decide. I know this now.
I agree with the above 2 although there is an option of limiting it to who can see the post, if shes doing it for the entire world to see then maybe it suggests need for attention, maybe she limits it though to just a few people and really she wants help from them? I know on fb for example i have some statuses that only 5 people can see where i will post how I am honestly feeling but no one other than those 5 can see them
I don't think it's particularly productive or adaptive. Also, I believe it's against Facebook's rules to post things like that (awareness type things are fine, but anything that either promotes or encourages self-harm, or expresses intent to harm oneself is prohibited).
But I also don't think it's particularly helpful to judge people who do these things. Most likely, they're just trying to reach out for help (whether they realize it or not), any way they can. Sure it's not the most adaptive way to go about it, but I would think that most people on this site would understand the kind of desperation that leads people to do things that would generally not be considered "adaptive," or even "appropriate." Remember that most people would say the same things about SH -- it's not "adaptive," or "appropriate," but yet it's something most people here have done, and we've all had our reasons for doing it, even though those reasons aren't necessarily immediately obvious to everyone around us.
Emily
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If one of my friends does this then I block their posts on my News Feed. It isn't a helpful thing to read as it encourages competition and I also, like has been said already, believe that it is against the Facebook rules.
It is damaging the already delicate stereotype that people who self-harm are attention-seeking and so I think it is very wrong. The people who post that kind of thing may possibly need a nudge in the right direction or a bit of help, however, as they are clearly struggling.
FB rules aside, I believe it's not necessarily unethical to post about feeling really low. I would say it's unhelpful to post details of negative actions like SI because it's unproductive to your healing. That aside, on FB people usually use their real names, so if this information ever gets public, it could lead to stimga and discrimination eg. for employment purposes. However, I do not feel people who post these things are doing a disservice to the SI community, like some of you seem to say. I don't think we necessarily have a responsibility for defying stereotypes, after all.
"Character cannot be developed in ease and quiet. Only through experience of trial and suffering can the soul be strengthened, ambition inspired, and success achieved." - Helen Keller
I think it's incredibly inappropriate to do something like that. I used to have this one particular Facebook friend who would make constant posts about how she felt the urge to SI (now there's nothing wrong with that,) but she also used to take pictures off the internet of other people's self-inflicted wounds and post them claiming that it was herself. Noe this was practically impossible since she had no scars and a reverse-search of the picture came up with many results across the web. Needless to say she was simply doing it for attention and to be coddled and cared for,obviously without the thought of how triggering her "cry for help" was for many people who actually suffer with this problem. Seeing all these similar accounts makes me wish that Facebook had a stronger policy against glorifying self harm/suicide.
I think it's incredibly inappropriate to do something like that. I used to have this one particular Facebook friend who would make constant posts about how she felt the urge to SI (now there's nothing wrong with that,) but she also used to take pictures off the internet of other people's self-inflicted wounds and post them claiming that it was herself. Noe this was practically impossible since she had no scars and a reverse-search of the picture came up with many results across the web. Needless to say she was simply doing it for attention and to be coddled and cared for,obviously without the thought of how triggering her "cry for help" was for many people who actually suffer with this problem. Seeing all these similar accounts makes me wish that Facebook had a stronger policy against glorifying self harm/suicide.
Although a few years ago this would have pissed me of incredibly, I have to say that now that I've been free of SI for long enough that it no longer feels quite so personal, and as an adult (I'm assuming this person was a teenager as the majority of people who engage in SI are, and you're a good bit younger than I am and I'd hope that any of your FB friends who are not teenagers are people you know well enough that you wouldn't be referring to them as FB friends), quite honestly, I'm just glad that she wasn't actually harming herself that severely, and I hope that one way or another she did get the help she so clearly needs.
As far as Facebook policy though, my understanding is that they *do* have rules against that kind of thing. Did you try reporting it to them? My understanding is that they respond my removing the photos and other relevant content, and blocking functions or banning the person entirely as necessary to stop further such content being posted, but also refer the person to various services (suicide hotlines, etc.) based on where they live that would be more appropriate places to seek help for the issues they were posting about. Under some circumstances (such as a credible suicide threat, especially from a minor), they could even go so far as to contact local law enforcement to make sure the person is safe. Hopefully if she is still posting those things on Facebook, you've either removed her from your friends, or hidden her posts from your newsfeed, but if it does come up again, it might be worth at least trying reporting it to Facebook.
Emily
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I think that it's just attention seeking as it's basically saying "look how screwed up I am" when, for most people, self harm is a secret. Also a simple google search would lead you to here which could help in the long run anyway.
The world is just illusion always trying to change me.
You will find wonder wherever you can, and spread joy whenever you are able.
I felt emotions of gentleness and pleasure, that had long appeared dead, divide within me. - Frankenstein.
I find it kind of sad... I feel that generally the person who does that is looking for some comfort or an attachment of some kind, some kindness perhaps. But I will admit that I also find it irritating as I don't want to see that kind of thing in my newsfeed. What concerns me is that, whilst I'd ignore it, others don't and can be quite unkind to people who express themselves like that - people who are often very vulnerable.
It concerns me when I see people publishing things regarding there personal self harm on social networking sites. Chances are they have a massive list of friends, which may include people they know in real life yet aren't very close to. In some respects revealing this information makes them vulnerable, as unfortunately there are still people out there who have no understanding of self harm, or mental health generally. which may put them in danger of being mocked and talked about amongst their peers offline.
It also concerns me that individuals who do this are looking for support in an unsuitable environment where they are unlikely to find what they are looking for. I often hear about people posting pictures of their injuries on Tumblr and although this may be the only opportunity they feel that they have to express themselves, it can be triggering for other users and again make the poster vulnerable.
I find it inappropriate also. If people feel the need to share that kind of thing, they can look up self harm sites such as here. I'd never want to share that kind of thing on fb. Its ok to say you're having a bad day and get support for that.
