In need of some kind of advice please?

[andhearts]

i've spent the last three hours distraught and knowing i'm inevitiably going to self harm.

I'm hoping for some words of advice or positivity because there really is nobody I can talk to in this moment apart from the computer screen.

I haven't sh in three months, and with the help of therapy i've slowly started to come off anti depressants. But recently its really started to hit me again and I'm terrified.
I promised my family I was better , that I could handle going back to uni.
I can't bear to tell my friends I need help.
I promised myself I wouldn't have to come back to this site.

My gf ended things with me today and i'm mortified. She was my best friend, the only person that I thought understood me completely. I know it sounds petty, and i've been through alot worse and got over it, but its come at completely the worst time.

And I can't tell her i'm triggered in fear of her thinking i'm being selfish.
I need distraction,

any words of wisdom or just anything positive I can get from any of this would be really appreciated.

I've come too far to fall back into the habit of sh again :(

[Pennacious]

i wish i could offer you advice on what to do but i do not have the words right now. just know you are not alone.

[castaway]

Fisrt of all, congrats on being 3 months free, thats an amazing acheivment! Sorry to hear about your girlfriend I hope your feeling better soon. Maybe you could call your theripist, or someone who you feel comfortable talking to. Keep distracting yourself and remind yourself how far you've come. Not brillent advice, sorry, but as the above poster said, remember your not alone.
All the best!

[crazykat]

Well done on 3 months, that is an amazing effort. It sounds like you have alot going on for you right now which is why I think it would be important to talk to someone about the way you are feeling whether that be your therapist or your family. I am sure your family would much rather you come to them for a bit of extra support than to find out you have hurt yourself. Also have a look at this, it provides a great big list of distractions you might find helpful. Keep reminding yourself of how far you have come, you can do this. Take care
Kat xxx

[PassedExpectations]

i would bet that your family would much rather know whats going on than have you trying to protect them and hurting yourself in the process. and if they expected everything to just be better and not difficult anymore, then that is their problem not yours. i sometimes have to remind my parents that just cause things have been good for a bit doesn't mean that they cant go downhill quickly if something happens, or just if i start feeling different.