christmas... support needed guys...

[emily cries]

hey guys, im really sorry for asking for support, but f mi honest, im really freaking out. Like... REALLY freaking out. Our school chritmas meal is tonight and im scared out of my mind. Im not ready to deal with this, I told my friend that ive got over the bulimia and in turn the anorexia but... i havent so.... im scared and... i dont know how i can do this.
emily xxx

[kbeth]

Okay, start by breathing! Is your friend going with you? Maybe she can support you during this. If you're not sure what to eat, maybe pay attention to what your friend's eating for hints. And don't panic! One christmas dinner has never killed anyone, or made anyone fat. I've had anorexia, not bulimia, so I'm not as sure what to say about that, but can you commit to not purging after the meal? It seems like if you go into the meal with purging as even a possibility in the back of your mind, you'll be setting yourself up for failure a little bit. I know that I have to tell myself that SH and anorexia are not even options for me, because otherwise I'll fall back into them.

Try to focus on parts of the meal that you enjoy, like maybe getting dressed up or doing your hair or talking with friends. That way you won't be obsessing so much about the food part.

And remember you don't have to do it perfect; just do it the best you know how! And remember to have fun :)

[Hevs]

Hi Emily.
would you feel able to talk to one of your teachers? do any of them know?
ask your freind to support you too cos im sure she will want to be there for you.
please pm me anytime and take care. xx

[emily cries]

sorry, im just getting more and more anxious as the day goes on!! Im so worried about it... yeah, shes gonna be there and i guess now she knows thatll be a little easier but its just the idea of having to sit and eat in front of so many people that.. iitscares me. Thats kinda pathetic, isnt it?... haha its funny kbeth, its almost like youre standing in my room with me, just watching me panic!! i know i should be focussing on the good parts but.. its tricky you know?
i wouldnt want to talk to the teachers because... well, i board right now and the school im at has quite a.. strong policy on EDs. Basically, if you have one, or are found out to be tlaking about it youre sent home. I refuse to be sent back into foster care coz i worked my bum off to get here!! they might just thin im attention seeking too...
yeah, shes been very good about it, we had a littl eheart to heart last night and shes been really open and unjudgemental about everything which makes a change :) so i think youre right, she does want to help...
thanks hevs, you too
emily xxxx

[Batteries Not Included]

During & before the meal, comment on saying you feel a bit queasy/sick and how you need to pee. Then, after the meal say to your friend "okay, I REALLY need to pee/I feel REALLY sick now, I'll be right back." and excuse yourself to the bathroom. To add to the "I feel sick" story, take only a little bit of food and kinda play around with it.

Please do try to get over it quickly and I hope you get help <3