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Old 10-02-2012, 07:26 PM   #1
xbertyx
 
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feeling suddenly triggered..

hey a few days ago a friend of mine made a comment when i was saying i had chubby cheeks saying i wasnt fat or skinny. im a recovering anorexic so being told that i wasnt skinny upset me. however im still eating and have no problems with that. i instead have this strong urge to cut though i havent done it for almost two years and dont want to mess it up. i feel like if i just had one little cut though it would do me good to get it out of my system?...




i dont feel so good anymore
not the way i used to feel
when i was young


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Old 10-02-2012, 07:35 PM   #2
Tig
 
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I'm sorry your friend made that comment, though I'm sure it wasn't said to upset you it was highly insensitive. I'm glad you've continued to eat.

Well done on the two years of not cutting. I can understand you are feeling triggered and it's being triggered that is tricking your brain in to thinking "one cut will be okay". I have fallen in to that trap before, but I've found that it's almost like a drug. I've done one cut and then felt like it's not enough so carried on.

Please don't let this comment trigger a slip up. It wouldn't ruin all your hard work because we all have slip ups in recovery but it would be really sad to let a comment that probably wasn't intended to be said like it was, screw things up for you.

Do you think there is anything else you can do instead of cutting?

xx

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Old 10-02-2012, 10:26 PM   #3
Scaredy-cat
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Definitely dont try 'just one cut'. Its very very unlikely to stop at one. You know you are strong enough to get through this as youve done it before, sp just keep telling yourself that



He was no longer jean valjean but no. 24601 -les miserable


Some of life's mysteries will never be solved, such as why, after spending an entire evening listenong to Bach, do I find myself humming "the birdie song".......

I am reaching, but i fall, and the stars are black and cold, as i stare into the void of a world that cannot hold- les miserables

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Old 12-02-2012, 04:05 AM   #4
PassedExpectations
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how are things going?

i agree with what others have said. "just one cut" is the same as an alcoholic saying "just one drink" or a smoker saying "just one more cigarette" or a procrastinator saying "i'll just leave it for one more day.." ... it doesn't actually turn out the way that one intends it to.




this is my magical medicine cabinet. Left to right they contain: courage, hope, calmness, and strength.

The magical part: They NEVER run out, so borrow some any time you want.



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Old 13-02-2012, 10:39 PM   #5
xbertyx
 
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thank you all. im giving myself until valentines day and if im still craving il give myself one. it will stay at one i assure you.



i dont feel so good anymore
not the way i used to feel
when i was young


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