Confused about a friend and feelings

[Vicky5621]

hey guys.
I'm kinda having a hard time about something. A few days ago, i was on Facebook with my friend. We were just talking randomly then she brought up my cutting. It's kinda weird for me but she usually brings it up, so it's beginning to be less awkward now. So we get to talking.
This is how the conversation went:

"hey bud" (thats me)
"hey."
"waddup"
"have you cut yourself?"
*pause*
"yes"
"when is this gonna stop!"
"I don't know!"

Well, this may take a while, so I'll just sum it all up. She started asking me all this stuff that kinda surprised me. She's like "Why would you quit cutting when it works?" I agreed. "Why would you stop when you have a blade right there?" Again, I agreed, with hesitation. "Why would you stop? Why would you try something else when cutting is all you need?" I thought that was totally unfair. I said that I wanted to stop. I really really do, but I have to agree for now. "Its been almost 3 years! When is it done? Is it done now? Yes or No" That's really inconsiderate. It's not that easy. I got so pissed of.
But she called me last night. She really wants to help. She's tried everything. Now she thinks I should go on anti-depressants. She almost cried on the phone cause she was sorry about what she said.
Now I'm so confused. I know she'll get mad again. But she's my best friend. Is there anything I can tell her about this without sounding to harsh? I want her around but she has no idea how unbearably hard this is.
She doesn't know how suicidal I feel at this moment and for like the past few weeks. No one knows. I have no idea what to do! A little help?
Sorry about rambling. Its just I can't go anywhere but here to talk about this stuff.

[brokendancer]

just spend some time with her doing other stuff...yano like shopping. this way you can build up your frindship, then you can tralk to her about what she can do to help. my best friend lets me ring her, i dont tell her that its because i want to cut when i call, and we just talk about stuff for half an hour, gives me time to calm down and stuff, and if taht doesnt work, and im feeling rely suicidal we will hang out. mabie this could work for you and your mate?

[shadow-light]

maybe she needs proof that you are trying... the only people who really know about my SI have all gotten like this at one point or another... so as evidence of my efforts I got councilling, then went to a doctor, and now a therapist... I didn't feel I needed to (though now I think maybe I did...) but I wantd to show people that I am making an effort and sometimes people need evidence... actions or whatever...

SI is a very hard thing to understand... as far as none SIers see it's a case of "pain is bad, so why cause pain to yourself?" and to be honest... that's is a VERY hard question to answer... so as far as people see as pain is bad it should be easy to avoid pain... have you ever sat down and discussed SI properly? I know it's a hard or even taboo topic, but maybe if she had some level of understanding it may make you both feel a little better

[Katiee]

Hmm, I don't know what to suggest, but I hope everything gets sorted soon! xo.