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Old 19-03-2021, 10:12 AM   #1
[Luna]
 
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Join Date: Mar 2011
Location: UK
Some Poems

Hi guys,
Poetry was a major coping mechanism last year. I wrote over 100 poems during lockdown. I thought I'd share some of my mental health ones. Maybe others can relate?

Just putting a TW before you go on xx

I am setting myself free

You donít know your own strength
Iím not talking about brawn
Itís the scars I have worn since youíve been gone
The insidious words you planted
like seeds, burrow and fester
Keeping your memory alive
With every breath Iíve survived

You donít get the key to my mind
Leave your (so called) love behind
I have no place left for it anymore
The fear and the sickness
Iíve been a fool to hang on to
I always believed you
You havenít let me live yet
I will never forget

The danger lied in your sentences
The threats that left me defenceless
Adjectives became afflictions
Friction in fiction
Almost like an addiction
To the misery you caused me
I know now it was empty
Suspended in time
Iím setting myself free

The Guide to Wellness

I am but a series of fragmented sentences
Trying to make sense of the hissing
And whispers
Telling me
Iíve always been too much
And not enough
Never the right ratio of either
An overwhelming explosion of both
Colliding on a path dead set
For destruction

I canít help but wonder
How wonderful it must feel to fit right
In the world
Not to be broken or damaged
Full of cracks, constantly
Gluing yourself back together
Endlessly filing down edges
So they donít cut too deeply
They always say
Hurt people hurt people
Oh god, itís agony
To be wielding the weapon
Of your splintered psyche

I have always puzzled
The formula for healthy
The guide to wellness
The recipe for recovery
Will it ever belong to me?
Or will I forever be
Doomed to watch life from the periphery

'Recovery' is just a disorder with a different name

Goosebumps ripple, prickled skin
Blue lips and hollow grin
Chain smoking, pacing lines
The way we have a thousand times
Popping pills to dull the ache
Running ítil my muscles shake
Ruled by numbers, ever falling
Finding a safer skin to crawl in
Worried whispers, frustrations greet
ďI donít know why you canít just eatĒ

We choke down mouthfuls and call it healing
A larger cage with deeper feeling
Swelling body, inherent shame
Still she lingers, calling your name
Wrappers litter to drown her out
In toilet stalls, sheíll scream and shout
Angry whispers, insults spat
Be careful now, youíre getting fat
Binge in secret, heartís laboured beating
ďI donít know why you donít stop eatingĒ

Splintered

A splintered brain
Mentally reframed
The threat spits
And we split again
Shattered
On the outside composed
No one knows
Just how deep the scar goes

The injury is ageless
Angry scribbles of the marred
Fills up countless pages
Yet the itch isnít scratched
The punishment wonít fit
The hole is far too gaping
For the hand of dirt you threw in it

At night, the same old fight
Ignites
Guttural cries of fear and spite
Nail biting anguish
Stuck, suspended in motion
I am in the palm of your hands
You are but a mere man
How do you inspire such devotion?

Dear You

Dear You
I couldnít remember your name even if I wanted to
You see, my mind is scarred and twisted
because someone like you insisted
on taking everything you felt you were entitled to
with all your power, you
smashed me into oblivion
I canít tell you how much time has been wasted
because instead of living and thriving
Iíve just been breathing, surviving this plague
you bestowed on me

Do you even remember me?
Was I just a drop in the sea?
I wonder how many lives you collected under your belt
Have you even felt
an ounce of remorse
It all screams of injustice and it just doesnít make sense
that you did the crime
but I live the sentence

I will never wish cruelty on another living soul
The world is full of evils and your pain
will not make me whole
I have found beauty in the darkness you plunged me into
In spite of you, I have sought kindness
I trust (maybe too freely) and I love
You can not take that away from me
and that love will free me
Eventually



A splintered brain
Mentally reframed
The threat spits
And we split again
Shattered
On the outside composed
No one knows
Just how deep the scar goes


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Old Today, 11:53 AM   #2
MoNo
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Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: sydney

i really like splintered. good stuff, hope to see more

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