Live Help


Forum Jump
Post New Thread  Reply
Old 10-04-2020, 08:03 PM   #301
one_step_closer
The Shadow of the Day
 
one_step_closer's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2004
Location: Scotland

Remember that feelings don't equal facts. You seem to be taking this all from one side, from the voices, and not considering the other side. It wouldn't be selfish to stay alive because you want to...and because your family would want you to, and your friends, and us here. Everyone else won't die if you are alive, they will continue to die just as humans do but it won't be your fault. Your death would be one death too many, a death that would have needlessly happened.





I put it down on paper and then the ghost does not ache so much.


one_step_closer is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 10-04-2020, 08:08 PM   #302
Cacoethes
ˇViva la Revolución!
 
Cacoethes's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2008
Location: Hyrule
I am currently:

The voices are powerful
More powerful than any of the doctors I've seen
Thats why I believe them
The doctor said to trust them but I don't know if I can
They are so stuck in their mindset that it's all mental illness
I know people want me to stay alive
They say that here too
And I do feel loads of guilt for having to do this



I'm fine! Totally fine. I don't know why it's coming out all loud and squeaky, 'cause really, I'm fine!


Who else is fine?!?!?


Cacoethes is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 10-04-2020, 08:12 PM   #303
one_step_closer
The Shadow of the Day
 
one_step_closer's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2004
Location: Scotland

What about the voices is powerful? They are only voices. The people around you have bodies and treatments and they care.





I put it down on paper and then the ghost does not ache so much.


one_step_closer is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 10-04-2020, 08:24 PM   #304
Cacoethes
ˇViva la Revolución!
 
Cacoethes's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2008
Location: Hyrule
I am currently:

I don't know
They feel powerful
Like they know things that people couldn't possibly know
They've been with me for 17 years
I trust them



I'm fine! Totally fine. I don't know why it's coming out all loud and squeaky, 'cause really, I'm fine!


Who else is fine?!?!?


Cacoethes is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 11-04-2020, 11:18 AM   #305
one_step_closer
The Shadow of the Day
 
one_step_closer's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2004
Location: Scotland

But there have been times when they haven't affected you so much? If you look back you go through periods where things are really awful but you always get to the point where you look back and can see things more clearly. You can do that again. It will be hard work to challenge things bit by bit but I truly think you can do it.





I put it down on paper and then the ghost does not ache so much.


one_step_closer is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 11-04-2020, 11:50 AM   #306
Cacoethes
ˇViva la Revolución!
 
Cacoethes's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2008
Location: Hyrule
I am currently:

Thank you
Things were better when I was on clozapine
Though I can't work out why because I'm positive this isn't mental illness.
Maybe there's an ingredient in it that the voices don't like
Like how demons don't like salt
The doctor here said she was willing to put me back on it but I'm still not taking tablets so I can't



I'm fine! Totally fine. I don't know why it's coming out all loud and squeaky, 'cause really, I'm fine!


Who else is fine?!?!?


Cacoethes is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 11-04-2020, 01:33 PM   #307
one_step_closer
The Shadow of the Day
 
one_step_closer's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2004
Location: Scotland

Maybe the new depot will be useful. Depixol? I've been on that and I think it was quite useful but I always get too bad physical side effects with depots. What stops you from taking tablets, especially if they help?





I put it down on paper and then the ghost does not ache so much.


one_step_closer is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 11-04-2020, 01:52 PM   #308
Cacoethes
ˇViva la Revolución!
 
Cacoethes's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2008
Location: Hyrule
I am currently:

It is depixol
I had the test dose the other day and no side effects I don't think which is good

It's because I don't want to drink and I have to drink to take meds



I'm fine! Totally fine. I don't know why it's coming out all loud and squeaky, 'cause really, I'm fine!


Who else is fine?!?!?


Cacoethes is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 11-04-2020, 04:24 PM   #309
one_step_closer
The Shadow of the Day
 
one_step_closer's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2004
Location: Scotland

Are you still managing to drink sometimes though? It's really not good for you to stop drinking completely. I hope everything goes ok with the depot.





I put it down on paper and then the ghost does not ache so much.


one_step_closer is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 11-04-2020, 05:20 PM   #310
Cacoethes
ˇViva la Revolución!
 
Cacoethes's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2008
Location: Hyrule
I am currently:

I'm trying not too but I had a coffee today because staff were bothering me about it
Even the other patients have started to nag me about food and drink
Thank you



I'm fine! Totally fine. I don't know why it's coming out all loud and squeaky, 'cause really, I'm fine!


Who else is fine?!?!?


Cacoethes is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 12-04-2020, 11:13 AM   #311
one_step_closer
The Shadow of the Day
 
one_step_closer's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2004
Location: Scotland

What is the purpose of not drinking? How are you getting on so far today?





I put it down on paper and then the ghost does not ache so much.


one_step_closer is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 12-04-2020, 11:37 AM   #312
Cacoethes
ˇViva la Revolución!
 
Cacoethes's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2008
Location: Hyrule
I am currently:

To die
It's so hard though
I'm so thirsty
Only had 2 hours sleep so not feeling too great
Also getting strong urges to ligature



I'm fine! Totally fine. I don't know why it's coming out all loud and squeaky, 'cause really, I'm fine!


Who else is fine?!?!?


Cacoethes is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 12-04-2020, 11:42 AM   #313
tamobhuuta
 
Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: U.K.
I am currently:

Do you have anything you can use as a ligature? If so, could you be really brave and give it to staff?



with Christ I hang upon the cross

tamobhuuta is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 12-04-2020, 11:49 AM   #314
Cacoethes
ˇViva la Revolución!
 
Cacoethes's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2008
Location: Hyrule
I am currently:

I will ALWAYS have something I can use as a ligature unless they stripped me naked which obviously they can't do here (it has happened before in seclusion and picu years ago)



I'm fine! Totally fine. I don't know why it's coming out all loud and squeaky, 'cause really, I'm fine!


Who else is fine?!?!?


Cacoethes is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 12-04-2020, 11:52 AM   #315
nonperson
 
nonperson's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2017
Location: London-ish
I am currently:

Maybe you could tell staff what you're thinking and they might check on you more often.

nonperson is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 12-04-2020, 12:10 PM   #316
tamobhuuta
 
Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: U.K.
I am currently:

Then I agree with np, try telling staff. Be as honest as possible.



with Christ I hang upon the cross

tamobhuuta is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 12-04-2020, 03:57 PM   #317
one_step_closer
The Shadow of the Day
 
one_step_closer's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2004
Location: Scotland

Please talk to someone Beckie, you don't want to get all your stuff taken off you. We don't want you to get hurt. I know that urges can be really strong but you can get through this.





I put it down on paper and then the ghost does not ache so much.


one_step_closer is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 12-04-2020, 05:09 PM   #318
Cacoethes
ˇViva la Revolución!
 
Cacoethes's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2008
Location: Hyrule
I am currently:

I did tell them
I've talked quite a lot today
So far managed to not do anything
I was half asleep for a while
Really struggling today and don't want to keep bothering the staff about the same stuff all the time



I'm fine! Totally fine. I don't know why it's coming out all loud and squeaky, 'cause really, I'm fine!


Who else is fine?!?!?


Cacoethes is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 12-04-2020, 06:25 PM   #319
one_step_closer
The Shadow of the Day
 
one_step_closer's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2004
Location: Scotland

Staff had said to me before that they'd rather I talk to them about the same things over and over than get the point of harming myself. Well done for sharing how things are for you and please keep doing it. You have shown so much strength today.





I put it down on paper and then the ghost does not ache so much.


one_step_closer is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 12-04-2020, 06:40 PM   #320
Cacoethes
ˇViva la Revolución!
 
Cacoethes's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2008
Location: Hyrule
I am currently:

Thank you lindsay

Yes I've heard similar from staff
I guess that's what they are here for
It's a bit difficult because of moving wards it's all brand new staff so I don't know anyone but staff today have all been very nice
Just hope night staff are good too because I find night times hard anyway and today has been very difficult



I'm fine! Totally fine. I don't know why it's coming out all loud and squeaky, 'cause really, I'm fine!


Who else is fine?!?!?


Cacoethes is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply


Currently Active Members Viewing This Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
 
Thread Tools Search this Thread
Search this Thread:

Advanced Search

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

vB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Censor is OFF
Forum Jump


Sea Pink Aroma
All times are GMT +1. The time now is 07:16 AM.