Contains sexual abuse - flashbacks, nightmares and inner stuff. (DID)
Last night was fun.
And by fun, i mean completely horrific and re-traumatising.
Went to bed, lay there awake for a while, just like the night before. Then, sleep started coming in little waves -- falling asleep for a few minutes and then waking up again. Theeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeen came the nightmares that we know weren't actually ****ing nightmares but flashbacks and new memories coming up, from our biological father's sexual abuse including the men that he let hurt us for money, to the people from the church doing stuff, and Emma, and the newer things had our biological mother being involved too. It was so graphic that Dove got triggered out, and her host Zack was internally rapid switching as the internal stuff and flashbacks still happened. And as far as we can tell, a fair amount of people in the system got either the full force of the flashbacks or the effects of it, and now we're just kind of... reeling from it I guess. I know I feel like I've been hit by a truck and my head is spinning.
We don't know what to do. And we need to hurry up and get therapy asap because this is adding to the shitty feelings already going on.
On top of this, I know for a fact that there's people in our system that want to get back in touch with some of the people that abused us and i don't have a clue was to do about that. I'll probably post another thread about it.
Anyone know of any way to stop the flashbacks, especially when we're asleep? I don't know what to do about the internal stuff right now so I'm just going to try and focus.
Last edited by Absynnthe : 30-03-2015 at 10:15 PM.
Reason: asking for help rather than just rambling.