Can't stop

Samthefootball · 04-07-2018, 02:30 PM

I get so sad that I haven't got a girlfriend, a job, a car or a place at UNI yet that I go on forums and I get angry and ask for advice. I try not to do it but there is something in my head that can't stop, I think about it every day, I cry myself to sleep I just want to improve my life and I don't know the first step.

I suppose I'm trying to lose weight and doing well which is one good thing

Samthefootball · 04-07-2018, 05:54 PM

Everything, getting the girlfriend, having a good job, going to UNI and having a car.

My stepsiblings have people they love and are younger then me, my stepbrother has a girlfriend who he is going to be renting a flat out soon and I want that. I can't even talk to girls though as I might say the wrong thing

Samthefootball · 04-07-2018, 06:07 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Iamcatbug

So what can you do right now to sort this? Are you applying for jobs? Uni?

I can't go to UNI right now because i haven't got the grades

And yeah Im trying to apply for jobs but none get back to me. But i would never apply for fast food

shrimpy · 04-07-2018, 06:17 PM

I think the first step would be to ackjnowledge for yourself that you can't do all this at once. A decent job usually comes after uni, a car tends to be more affordable once you have done the student bit and got the job. Uni and work are good places for meeting and talking to people socially.

Perhaps work out how you are going to address ONE of these things, maybe apply some logic as to which would be easiest to address first?

Also, girls are not aliens.... think of them as people, just like yourself, and try talking to them as a person rather than a potential partner.

shrimpy · 04-07-2018, 06:18 PM

Have you considered college to improve your grades?

Samthefootball · 04-07-2018, 06:18 PM

yeah but im 25, im running out of time mate. I have to see them as potential partners otherwise they might run out

shrimpy · 04-07-2018, 06:22 PM

that's bollocks, and I'm sure you know it. You're not running out of time until you're much older than this.

A point to think about..... Seeing them as potential partners is not working for you. You said yourself you can't talk to girls (women at this age) for fear of saying the wrong thing. You need to change your approach. Get to know people for themselves, and see what develops. People are put off but perceived desperation.

nonperson · 04-07-2018, 06:24 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Samthefootball

yeah but im 25, im running out of time mate. I have to see them as potential partners otherwise they might run out

That's got to be a joke, right..?

Samthefootball · 04-07-2018, 06:25 PM

I am at college. But look I can't just go up to a girl saying Hi, nice weather isn't it. Wanna go on a date?

What do you say after the weather bit. I like travelling?

shrimpy · 04-07-2018, 06:28 PM

No one is suggesting that you do that. Quite the reverse. Say hi to people, smile at them, ask how they are, dating comes quite a whilse after getting to know someone for a lot of people.

Samthefootball · 04-07-2018, 06:29 PM

But when I smile at girls in public they don't smile back

Samthefootball · 04-07-2018, 09:25 PM

I supposed I just need to get more confident, if I stick to my goals I have set I can achieve anything. I need to become less jealous and more focused in me. Its not healthy, i should be happy for my step siblings that they are happy.

Someone is out there for me I know it and hopefully in the next 10 years I will be married and have kids but i can't do that if i become more and more jealous