I'm just wondering how everyone feels about their diagnosis and if anyone can relate to how I'm feeling. Today I was told my diagnosis was depression and anxiety, which I already knew, but I have been told I have traits of emotional unstable something. And symptoms of other mental illness. I guess it's left me feeling confused. I feel uncertain as to where I am if that makes sense. I know I should look at the symptoms and deal with them. I don't know.
It can be scary to be told that there might be other unexpected stuff.
I can relate to how you are feeling, a few years ago when I went back under MH services I was told similar one diagnosis as I expecting and that I might have traits emotional unstable personality. It was a shock too, a few years down the line, there is now no talk of the traits and my first diagnosis is my only diagnosis. Just because they are talking about it being a possibility it doesn't mean that you will get that diagnosis.
So many mental illnesses overlap and diagnosing someone properly takes time, the nuances of the different illnesses can come down to how they respond and evolve. Do you have someone you can talk to about your diagnoses/possible diagnoses and what they would mean?
Was it traits of Emotionally Unstable Personality Disorder by any chance?
I think everybody would fit into traits of certain disorders and illness. But that's not them saying you have a new full other diagnosis. I don't think I'm helping very much with this as I'm not doing a very good job at explaining.
They are things that could be just a strong character trait (hence why I say everybody would fit traits above) or a bit of a problem that impacts you quite a bit but not severely. It can be hard to differentiate.
Did they explain to you what these traits were so you can understand it a bit better?
Also did they mention if they are going to help you with these traits they've picked up on? Will your care change at all?
I realise I may be leaving you with more questions than answers but I think it's really important you clarify things with your team as they obviously haven't made things clear enough to you. We all need to understand as patients what we are facing, and if you aren't aware of your symptoms then they need to help teach you what to pick up on.
'Cause I'll always remember you the same.
Oh eyes like wild flowers within demons of change ♥
Thanks Amy. No she didn't make it very clear, or I just wasn't able to absorb it all. I am getting help on how to deal with the depression and anxiety though.
I hate the EUPD dx because so many times it is stigmatised and symptoms are sidelined or treatment options made unavailable bc it's assumed to be PD problems - which has left me in many cases much worse off than I need to be with my mh in my opinion
It has also meant I haven't had intervention early enough and wound up on section for mania when I've been in A&e 4 times from consequences of manic behaviour.
And it means it took an 9 month battle to try a mood stabiliser (after years of asking anyway) wherein I was extremely depressed and suicidal - but for a long time it was put down to Pd. I'm on it now and over the last month and a half my mood has evened out and I'm no longer depressed (after being in bed almost 24/7 September -February and suicidal)
In terms outside of treatment effects I'm not too unsure. I used to read a lot about my illnesses and I've received some odd dx in the past (DID) and I found t unsettling not knowing or understanding anything. Since doing DBT it has helped me bc I could ask a lot of questions about what's normal life, what's a bpd behaviour and whats a mood symptom.
I've had to fight my corner bc of this stigma around EUPD though- and that makes me so angry and upset. I've been excluded from crisis services (HTT never take my referral anymore and it was. Hallenger against area manager last time)
A&e literally said to me last time "I can't do anything for you. I'm getting a bit sick of this now" - bearing in mind I don't go a&e on my own accord anymore bc of these remarks.
I only end up in hospital nr when I need it initially but when I'm sectioned by someone out of my borough. (New perspective maybe because they don't know my face)
Arienette, thank you for your reply. I'm so sorry for how you have struggled. Thank you for sharing with me and I hope you are now getting the help you need. Thank you.
This is maybe a bit of a pat answer, but I just want to try and welcome you to focus on how these things affect you, personally, in terms of focusing more on your own individual experiences than a generic list of symptoms. (I don't mean not to ask people about their experiences if it helps you understand better, I more mean to not worry too much about what's written in the manuals, unless you find it helpful).
I guess (as another person who has BPD as, I *think* my current diagnosis) I've found that, as a diagnosis, unhelpful for me. In terms of my treatment, I don't think I feel I've been stigmatised against (my team don't mention the BPD at all, to me, and haven't for years, probably - I don't know if that's a treatment approach they use for everyone, or not, but I like it!) because of my diagnosis. I do think, though, that there's a societal stigma around the diagnosis (even amongst other people with lived experience of mental health issues) and it's something that I've internalised, over the years, and has negatively affected my view of myself as a person.
That was all a bit long-winded, I'm sorry. I've had other diagnoses over the years, but a lot of the treatment has been focused around the BPD and I think that might be what my current diagnosis is in my file, but I don't know. I think, for me, I have found my recovery has occurred more naturally with an approach that deals more positively with my personal and individual experience of the life I lead and wish to lead.
It's okay to feel however you feel. It's okay not to know how you feel. How you feel will probably change over time, in different ways, as you gain different information and find what works and doesn't work for you.
TL;DR: A diagnosis tells part of your story, my advice is to allow your story to be your individual one.
