Does anyone feel free from people who were toxic towards you and even others in the past? Do you feel happier and more energized that they are no longer bothering you? I sometimes will be reminded of someone I didn't really care for, like seeing the college we both attended together, and it makes me realize how much more free and energized I feel without the person bugging me down. I felt like I was not able to be myself when this person was around.
There was one person in college who was constantly stuck up and arrogant, constantly bent reality and was really convinced she was right about anything and couldn't accept responsibility for her own failures. She also took advantage of her own disability to get people to do things for her she could clearly still do on her own. Most people would do things out of politeness but eventually get annoyed when they caught on.
Eventually she became an alcoholic especially after graduating from college. She would constantly talk about how much better she was than others, family members and friends she thought she was close to, while putting herself in danger and drinking excessive amounts of alcohol to the point of having to go to the hospital many times. She seemed to really enjoy talking about others, she would laugh about them and go into detail about why she felt like she was better than others and knew she was always right.
I haven't heard from her in several months, probably close to a year and that is fine with me. I never considered her a friend at all, but she would constantly hang around me at school even when I made it clear I didn't want her around because she really had no one else to hang around. She would go as far as to look for me in the residence hall I lived in while I would be out hanging out with friends elsewhere. She would also try to convince any new person I met that they were automatically not good friends and were just using me out of boredom. While some people did do that, that wasn't the case for everyone and she just assumed too much and felt like she was trying to control me. She basically saw people, including me, as disposable puppets it seemed. She would want to be around certain people, especially for help, but then talk bad about them behind their back. I'm sure she gossiped about me.
She would get mad at me if I hung around others and didn't try to keep in touch with her or talk to her, stating I am neglecting the friendship since she assumed we were best friends even though we weren't. I just simply didn't have any interest in having a friendship with her due to her personality. She would constantly be insulting and label me as gay because I am not interested in dating or sex and labeled me as fake because I'm not interested in being friends with her.
I'm not sure what she is doing now, I don't know if she is still an alcoholic, wouldn't be surprised if she is and if she possibly even screwed up her life to the point of no return. She may have more problems now than ever due to the fact that she strongly believed that marijuana and smoking was good for you. She even believed that drinking 8-12 or more cups of alcohol in one night was okay, which landed her in the hospital a lot. These are all things she told me. She texted me a lot despite me not wanting her to and talk bad about others, yet do that kind of stuff.
She also constantly believed that words, any word you could think of, actually had different meanings than they actually did even after proving it to her by showing her what they mean in a dictionary or showing her online through reliable resources. All of this made me very drained and I would constantly wish she would just leave me alone. Now that she finally stopped talking to me, just randomly stopped, I feel a lot better. I feel more free. It is a shame that she had to become an alcoholic and I believe she actually suffered more health problems due to it from what she told me before suddenly ceasing to talk to me.
She pressured me multiple times in the past to try to start drinking with her as well. Although I have had alcohol in the past, I never got drunk and didn't even like it and was not comfortable being around her drinking, especially after hearing how she is when she drinks. I don't have alcohol anymore, it is gross and not good. Is it true that being around toxic people can actually make you more depressed? Is there a reason some people will go as far as to bend reality like that just to ensure they are always right and truly believe they are better than other people? It took a long time, five years in college and two years after graduating, for her to stop talking to me but she finally did get the hint. I did tolerate her during college since it was so small and didn't want to create awkwardness or problems. Everyone did that, they were nice but weren't friends with her. But I never made it look like I wanted to be friends with her. She just assumed we were best friends, just like she did with everyone else
I used to be best friends with a girl who turned out to be a very toxic person. She was ok to begin with and she changed quite gradually but she began to be manipulative and controlling and she was also someone who always had to be right and always had to have everyone’s attention. Once I was able to actually see her and what she was doing clearly and refused to be her doormat anymore she threw a massive hissy fit and we haven’t spoken since.
I felt massively relieved and free once she was no longer in my life, and occasionally something will remind me of her and I will appreciate again just how glad I am to be free of her.
Unfortunately there are just some people in life who, for whatever reason, are toxic individuals. I’m glad you feel better for being free of this person in your life. No one can say why she is the way she is and whilst she seems to have issues with alcohol, neither of these things are your problem and it is fine to just wish her well in life and move on with your own life without her.
I used to be best friends with a girl who turned out to be a very toxic person. She was ok to begin with and she changed quite gradually but she began to be manipulative and controlling and she was also someone who always had to be right and always had to have everyone’s attention. Once I was able to actually see her and what she was doing clearly and refused to be her doormat anymore she threw a massive hissy fit and we haven’t spoken since.
I felt massively relieved and free once she was no longer in my life, and occasionally something will remind me of her and I will appreciate again just how glad I am to be free of her.
Unfortunately there are just some people in life who, for whatever reason, are toxic individuals. I’m glad you feel better for being free of this person in your life. No one can say why she is the way she is and whilst she seems to have issues with alcohol, neither of these things are your problem and it is fine to just wish her well in life and move on with your own life without her.
Yep you are right. Some people are just truly toxic and you should not be around them otherwise they will pull you down with them and cause a bunch of problems. The person you mentioned sounds a lot like the person I mentioned in the thread. Sounds like someone who feels the constant need to be right about everything and being a know it all. That is how the person I mentioned in the thread was like. Always had to be right, truly believed with her whole heart that she was better than everyone. Not just a maybe, she told me more times than I can remember to count how she believed she was way better than everyone and even went into great detail on why she believed so in order to prove that she was right.
Looking back on it, I actually wonder if she had some kind of mental or personality disorder. Some people are just arrogant and stuck up because they just are, but others are that way to an extreme due to some kind of disorder. But yeah, she was definitely toxic and I am glad to be away from her. And I'm glad you freed yourself from that person as well and now you get to move on and live your life without feeling drained. Yeah anytime I see the college we attended or a place she would frequent to get alcohol, I will always feel relieved that I am no longer dealing with her. She most likely messed up her life to the point of no return, once an alcoholic, always an alcoholic. But yeah, it is nice to be freed of that kind of person.
My former best friend was probably the most toxic person I ever met. After what he did to me I swore I woud never even think about him and so far I've been successfull. I've never felt more free. I can enjoy things again.
My former best friend was probably the most toxic person I ever met. After what he did to me I swore I woud never even think about him and so far I've been successfull. I've never felt more free. I can enjoy things again.
I am glad you are free of him. Yeah I rarely think abput the toxic acquaintance. I really could care less about what she is up to. She is way too toxic and too much of a miserable person to be around for me to care. I only remember when I see the college we attended or wjen I pass up the place she used to get drunk at on my way to visit a friend. In fact, she probably still goes to that same place to get drunk, if not then another place to do the same thing. But yeah, I feel energized and can do things again.
Its not always to identify toxic people before you allow then into your life. People are fake and shallow when you first meet them and they only allow you to see the side of them they want you to see. Takes a long time sometime to realize it, however there are signs that we sometimes ignore; and shouldn't but I know I have ignored the signs.
Best to trust your gut feeling(s) when it comes to people wanting to be your friend.. especially when or if they seem (too) desperate. Not saying that is always a sign though, I (used to) be this way until I realized that its perfectly alright to be your own best friend. Now I'm way more cautious when friendships seem one-sided.
Its not always to identify toxic people before you allow then into your life. People are fake and shallow when you first meet them and they only allow you to see the side of them they want you to see. Takes a long time sometime to realize it, however there are signs that we sometimes ignore; and shouldn't but I know I have ignored the signs.
Best to trust your gut feeling(s) when it comes to people wanting to be your friend.. especially when or if they seem (too) desperate. Not saying that is always a sign though, I (used to) be this way until I realized that its perfectly alright to be your own best friend. Now I'm way more cautious when friendships seem one-sided.
Exactly, totally agree. Yeah I used to always ignore the warning signs and may have even come off as desperate at times. Now I am way more cautious too and listen to my gut a lot more since it is almost always right.
