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Old 24-03-2024, 04:21 PM   #4081
tamobhuuta
 
Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: U.K.

Yeah, you need to be in the right place for therapy. I believe you'll get through this. Keep being honest with CMHT even if it feels like they're not listening. I urge you to fight the men and not get sucked into the other world, even if in some way it seems more attractive than this, reality.


Last edited by tamobhuuta : 24-03-2024 at 04:32 PM. Reason: Sp


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Old 24-03-2024, 05:01 PM   #4082
one_step_closer
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Join Date: Oct 2004
Location: Scotland

It's hard not to get sucked into the other world when the men are persistent and this world is becoming harder to manage and I'm losing a lot of daily skills etc. I feel like no one is willing to try and help me. I phoned Duty twice today but each time they hung up on me. I don't know how to get through the days until I see my psych. And I'm putting a lot on this appointment but I will end up with no reasonable conclusion to it whatever that would be.





I put it down on paper and then the ghost does not ache so much.

Don't try to calm the storm, calm yourself, the storm will pass.

You didn't come this far just to come this far.


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Old 24-03-2024, 05:31 PM   #4083
Elmer
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Something that took me a long time to learn, and that I still sometimes struggle to remember, is that psychiatry and medication is only one aspect of mental health. It's easy to feel dismissed when people suggest distractions or coping skills, but learning to utilise those things can be really helpful. They won't always be useful but the more they're practised the easier they will become. You've spoken about your CPN suggesting things like cleaning or changing your routine - could it be that he's recognising that the way things are isn't working for you, and trying to help you begin to slowly make positive changes? I know that it can be helpful to talk about things that are going on too, so maybe there's a balance to be found there.

It sounds like you've got a lot riding on your psych appointment and of course it's important, but it's not the only important thing. It may well be that medication can't completely 'fix' the problems you're having because brains are complicated things and everyone is different. Do you have a recovery college where you are? I've been looking at courses for myself and it could be a good way to socialise and learn some new skills, if it's an option for you. Or maybe something like the Hearing Voices Network - they have online and face to face groups all over the world.

I know things feel horribly stuck right now but there are ways through this, and it will be worth the hard work to get there.


Last edited by Elmer : 24-03-2024 at 05:37 PM.


'It's an impossible choice ... I'll just have to hope that when I flip the coin it somehow explodes and kills me.'

"You're not scared of climbing mountains. You're scared that you can't make them move."

Jenna was here :P


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Old 24-03-2024, 06:38 PM   #4084
one_step_closer
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Join Date: Oct 2004
Location: Scotland

Thanks for your reply, Lio.

I have ways of managing but I'm dying and struggling to do a lot of the things I used to do. I am trying to do other things like tidying. I don't know what changes I can make because I try to do all my tasks and all the things that used to interest me and there aren't many opportunities to try new things or I can't find things that interest me. There is no recovery college here.





I put it down on paper and then the ghost does not ache so much.

Don't try to calm the storm, calm yourself, the storm will pass.

You didn't come this far just to come this far.


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Old 27-03-2024, 04:43 PM   #4085
one_step_closer
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I really can't do this any more. I don't know what I'll do if the outcome of my psych appoint is just my psych telling me to cope. I can't cope. And is trying to cope all I will ever be doing? There's no one I can get support from right now. Hardly anyone is here now, my CPN is off for ages, and Duty is going to voicemail. I feel so alone. The MH services in my area are lacking as are other groups and activities. There is nothing to look forward to in life. Nothing is going to make things better. I have never really lived. I can't ever live if I feel so awful all the time and am restricted with what I can manage, I don't know what living actually looks like anyway.





I put it down on paper and then the ghost does not ache so much.

Don't try to calm the storm, calm yourself, the storm will pass.

You didn't come this far just to come this far.


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Old Yesterday, 05:09 PM   #4086
one_step_closer
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Probably annoying everyone here.

Music is making me feel worse now and I can't find any new music I like. All things I used to feel ok about have been taken away from me and made bad. Housework used to be ok. Now it is comprised of numerous difficult steps for each task. Antidepressants aren't helping my mood enough. I will never be ok. I'm back to struggling with all noises again. I can clearly see myself going backwards but no one can help me or would try to help me. One week and one day until my psych appointment. He will do nothing. I need different, more powerful meds. My current meds aren't helping enough. I wish he could see that and help me. I've tried therapy many times. I need chemicals to alter my brain. I can feel the distress and depression in my brain as a physical thing. Surely there are other med combinations I can try. I can't go on like this. I wish I had someone to talk to but feel like there is no point in phoning Duty. I don't want to be alive any more. Nothing helps. I am trapped in this pain. No one cares about me. They just let me suffer because I have EUPD. Why does no one care? Why all the judgements? I can't stand this. I should have had an appointment with my psych a long time ago but I am worthless and easily pushed to the side. I can see it in the way other people get good treatment and support. How do I get through one week and one day? How do I then get through the disappointment after I see my psych and he doesn't help me? Everything is so hopeless.





I put it down on paper and then the ghost does not ache so much.

Don't try to calm the storm, calm yourself, the storm will pass.

You didn't come this far just to come this far.


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