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View Poll Results: Is it weird not to have sex before marriage?
Yes 12 16.22%
No 55 74.32%
MOAR LESBIANS 17 22.97%
Multiple Choice Poll. Voters: 74. You may not vote on this poll

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Old 19-02-2013, 06:08 PM   #21
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hm.

I tend to have sex with people before being in a relationship with them. i dont think i could be in a relationship where the sex was ****. that makes me sound like a whore i know.

I dunno, people put a lot of emphasis on sex.. i dont see it as an important or particularly serious thing.





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Old 19-02-2013, 06:17 PM   #22
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I wouldn't say it's weird. Not very common, maybe. But not weird.

Personally, I couldn't wait until marriage... I think sex is relatively important in a relationship and I'd miss that. Also it's super fun. :P But that's just my personal opinion!



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Old 19-02-2013, 06:55 PM   #23
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I think sex is only important in a relationship if you have had sex. If youre a virgin/a virgin dating another virgin then its got less significance.




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Old 19-02-2013, 07:01 PM   #24
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Personal preference really.
I think it's more common now to have sex and not be married.
Personal I don't see how someone could be happy with waiting until they were married

Each to their own really

Edit: in reference to the fact that Jenna started this thre: lesbian sex confuses me, I don't get how it works!


Last edited by SilentBoy : 19-02-2013 at 07:24 PM.


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Old 19-02-2013, 07:25 PM   #25
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I don't think it's weird, it's just not frowned upon so much now if people do choose to have sex before marriage.
Personally I didn't have sex until I was almost 19, I hate the way that having sex is almost forced upon young teens these days as the 'norm' - it should be personal choice and when you are ready, not when you are told.



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Old 19-02-2013, 07:35 PM   #26
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I don't think it's weird or old fashioned at all, lots of different groups of people choose not to have sex before marriage for various reasons.

I think it used to be more common in the past than it is now, as society is much more accepting of sex before marriage than it was some years ago.





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Old 19-02-2013, 07:38 PM   #27
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Originally Posted by Strawberry X's View Post
I don't think it's weird, it's just not frowned upon so much now if people do choose to have sex before marriage.
Personally I didn't have sex until I was almost 19, I hate the way that having sex is almost forced upon young teens these days as the 'norm' - it should be personal choice and when you are ready, not when you are told.

Ah I caught a lot of flak in high school. Girls liked me a lot as I was athletic in build and was captain of football and swimming (and was on track). I ended up going out with best looking and most popular girl - who had been diddling around since 14 while I was still relatively saintly. Having 4 sisters I was naturally inclined toward being respectful - which was the last thing my little vixen wanted lol. I caught quite a lot of ridicule over that one but I stayed the course. In college I gave in though and left a swath of destruction. Not only could I not remember girls names in the morning I didn't even know them in the first place. I got bored of it all actually (more weary of lying I think). Then I met a girl younger who was a model in New York - and a virgin. She wanted to stay that way since her family was Mafia and she felt being a virgin was only thing that kept her better than the criminals in her family. I spent 5 years with her without doing anything to her. To even my surprise it was best relationship because there were zero undercurrents and second guessing about why I was involved and what I wanted. It also became easy to do - like high school was before taking the plunge lol.

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Old 19-02-2013, 07:46 PM   #28
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I don't think it's weird, I think it's quite sweet. I don't personally think you should wait till marriage but if someone wants to I don't think that's weird.






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Old 19-02-2013, 08:13 PM   #29
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Personally, I don't find it weird to not have sex before marriage but equally it's not something I am set on either.

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Old 19-02-2013, 09:05 PM   #30
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This surprised me.
To be fair, I didn't have that many friends, so half the school were probably at it, I just didn't know about it :P And the people I was friends with were mainly quite strict Christians.

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My parents got married about four times to each other. In a row, no divorcing. They just kept getting married. And some relatives still don't really believe they are married.
Lol, that sounds awesome! Are all four counted as legit legal marriages?

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Originally Posted by squirrelspit View Post
that makes me sound like a whore i know.
Don't know if you were just joking but no. You do not sound like a whore.

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Originally Posted by SilentBoy View Post
Edit: in reference to the fact that Jenna started this thre: lesbian sex confuses me, I don't get how it works!
Neither did I until I met Jodie :P I shall refrain from sharing details in this thread, but feel free to enlighten yourself via google, or alternatively I can PM you :P

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I spent 5 years with her without doing anything to her.
I believe *with is the word you were looking for there.



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Old 19-02-2013, 09:06 PM   #31
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I don't find it weird as I have a lot of very religious friends who chose not to do anything before marriage. Equally I have friends who slept around. A friend at school had a baby at 12. I think there's a lot of diversity with regards to this stuff now but for me I'm with my first (and only) consensual partner so I can't ever imagine being with anyone but the person I married.




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Old 19-02-2013, 09:39 PM   #32
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I don't think it's weird, but it is unusual now I guess.

But then people used to get married a lot sooner then too. I've been in my relationship 6 years. I think if we were going to wait until we got married to have sex then we would have either broken up or got married about 5 years ago!

I did wait about 6 months though, as I wouldn't want to have sex with someone I didn't 100% trust. And it's kind of not massively important to me.

So I do think that maybe waiting until marriage means you could rush into marriage too quickly before you really know your partner. I know it's not the old fashioned way, but I would have to have lived with someone and had sex with them before I would marry them as otherwise how can you be sure you will get on?



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Old 19-02-2013, 09:50 PM   #33
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I have a friend who is very religious and believes sex is only for procreation and just thinks it's bad otherwise and can't understand the idea of it being pleasurable or having any benefit to you. I can completely understand someone choosing to wait, but I can't understand my friends attitude at all. For me it's an important part of a relationship and I wouldn't want to wait, possibly because I have never been too pushed on the idea of marriage to begin with.

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Old 19-02-2013, 10:00 PM   #34
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I think sex is weird full stop. I just don't get it. At 26, I probably should, but I really don't.



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Old 19-02-2013, 10:07 PM   #35
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I don't think it's weird, but then I also don't think it's the norm.

I, obviously, haven't waited until marriage but I wish I had. I think sex its a complicated thing with lots of emotions involved and the potential to do a lot of damage / dramatically change lives etc. I think it's safer inside a long term committed relationship. I also have a (perhaps slightly controversial) view that if you are having heterosexual sex you should be prepared to deal with the possible consequences (pregnancy)


Incidental, I grew up going to church regularly, so sex outside marriage wasn't encouraged however my mum had the view that if you haven't had sex with someone you don't know if you click - it made sense when I was younger but now I completely disagree.

Also, Rob - it's really not that complicated :-P



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Old 19-02-2013, 10:10 PM   #36
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^What if you married someone and then found you were just not compatible sexually? You'd have to spend the rest of your marriage unfulfilled, resentful and not enjoying something humans are designed to enjoy?
Just wondering?




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Old 19-02-2013, 10:20 PM   #37
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Originally Posted by Aubergine View Post
I think sex is weird full stop. I just don't get it. At 26, I probably should, but I really don't.
There's no shoulds or shouldn'ts when it comes to something as personal as sex. Whatever you feel about it is okay. It doesn't matter how old you are or anything else. If you find it weird, then you find it weird, and that is okay.

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Old 19-02-2013, 10:23 PM   #38
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I can't imagine that would really happen, maybe I'm just naive. But from my limited sexual experience and discussions with friends, sexual satisfaction appears to be at its maximum in loving, openly honest relationships, not girth or sexual bonding. Therefore I struggle to imagine how sex could be an issue in a loving and openly honest relationship. I would suggest couples therapy (or sex therapy) if sex wasn't enjoyable within a marriage (or any relationship on that point)

In addition, sex is not the be-all and end-all of a good, healthy relationship. I'd be quite shocked if someone broke up with the love of their life because the sex wasn't good....


Last edited by [Awakening] : 19-02-2013 at 10:25 PM. Reason: .


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Old 19-02-2013, 10:26 PM   #39
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I suppose some incompatibilities could be compromised to make them less of an issue, I suppose also sometimes you might be willing to forgo something you enjoy to be with someone you love, and it wouldn't necessarily be resented. Although admittedly I've no real first hand knowledge of being in a committed relationship to then find out there were sexual incompatibilities.





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Old 19-02-2013, 10:31 PM   #40
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There's no shoulds or shouldn'ts when it comes to something as personal as sex. Whatever you feel about it is okay. It doesn't matter how old you are or anything else. If you find it weird, then you find it weird, and that is okay.
Thanks. :)



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