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Old 06-04-2016, 06:48 PM   #52681
Eir
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Tannin is used to make leather. Tannin is that drying after-taste you get from tea. I freak out over what it may do to my insides.
I deal with constant paranoia from over thinking things.... This is a small example.
Logically, I figure you cant tan your insides, seeing as the gastrointestinal tract is constantly renewing itself. But that doesn't stop me freaking out over it. I know it's irrational, especially as other things have tannin. Hence I label it paranoia.
My eyes are watering. I should attempt the sleep. Right sort of numB.
Not dangerous to self.
Night guys



...I try to outsmart him, but somehow he knows,
Wherever I am, that f***ing dog goes... - Dog, Andy Bull

No matter how bad things get, the true test is how we choose to respond to the pain we suffer, or inflict. - Amenadiel, Lucifer

Why is the path unclear,
When we know hope is near
Understand we'll go hand in hand, but we'll walk alone in fear
~~Margo is my penguin 🐧!!! ~~

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Old 06-04-2016, 07:16 PM   #52682
Doikers
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Good Night Annie :)



I'm still not comfortable in my skin and the anasthetic's slowly wearing thin - Otep
Everyones lost but me! - Indiana Jones

It's okay , they know me here .

Kahlia1981 is my adopted little sister :)


''Courage doesn't always roar , sometimes courage is that little voice at the end of the day that says I'll try again tomorrow"

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Old 07-04-2016, 12:45 AM   #52683
Kathryn_Anna
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So done with today. Too overwhelmed at the moment and hubby won't be home for who knows how long. 2 kids won't stop screaming (one screams then the other does it for fun it feels like) and the 3rd kid won't stop shouting "I don't know!" when asked a question about a book he supposedly read for school. I can't do the homework for you kid, sorry. Then there's my son's anxiety med fiasco. I'll save that for another post :/

*crawls into her fort to hide from it all*



Sometimes when I say "I'm okay," I want someone to look me in the eyes, hug me tight, and say "I know you're not."

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Old 07-04-2016, 12:47 AM   #52684
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I hope you get decent rest Annie.
And I hope everyone else is doing alright too. *offers hugs to all*

It's sort of weird to me how important RYL has been as far as affect on my life because I haven't been active on here in a long time.

But I met my (now ex)partner here, who introduced me to my best friend, who I love very much.

It just makes me think of the intricate webs that form between people through time and space and how if I never turned out the way I did and never ended up here both the worst and best parts of my life would never exist.

And then, inevitably, I get anxious about the opportunities I've missed and the possible paths my life didn't go down. I start to feel like it's too late to be everything I want to be. It's like going from the top to the bottom with a loud crash. I wish I could enjoy the adventure.

I have been enjoying coffee flavoured ice cream this week though, so that's something.

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Old 07-04-2016, 12:49 AM   #52685
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I'm sorry things are overwhelming right now Kathryn_Anna. That sounds unbelievably frustrating. Offering you hugs. Let us know if we can help somehow?

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Old 07-04-2016, 08:47 AM   #52686
Kahlia1981
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Annie: I'm so thankful QLD got rid of daylight savings because it really didn't work. Here's something for you. *gives huge mugs of coffee and a coffee maker* Feel free to share as you see fit.

Mark: The world really is odd.. And for you *gives a mug of English Breakfast tea*

Kat: Sorry that things have been overwhelming and that you are having problems family difficulties. I am really hoping that the problems with your son's medications are resolved quickly.

Drew: RYL really does have an important role in a lot of our lives and we don't realise it until something causes us to think of it. Just like you I get stuck/caught in the what-ifs, and thinking about opportunities missed, different life paths and the choices I made that I could have not made. But you still have time in this life to make choices of what you want to be or do. Also, what you've been through has made you who you are today.

My head's really not in a good place right now. My pain level is really high and I am badly wishing that I could just get up and start walking again. I've been able to self-propel around the unit including in and out of the unit onto the patio which is not easy. To get out I have to go backwards across the rails of the doors and, immediately, down a slope so you have to get your hands from the wheels to the brakes very quickly. Going in means going backwards up a slope, over the rails and not hitting the coffee table. Fun.

*grabs her bear, a blanket and a pillow and disappears into a corner to cry*



She shouts, she screams, she smashes your dreams . . .
Would you mind if I killed you? Would you mind if I tried to?
'Cause you have turned into my worst enemy,
You carry hate that I don't feel: It's over now
WHAT HAVE YOU DONE

* Proud Plumeria Sister * My Support Thread * I got lei'd in vets *
* My RYL Family: big brother Doikers; little sisters MammaMia & flutterby butterfly *


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Old 07-04-2016, 12:14 PM   #52687
Doikers
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I hope you guy and gals are doing well :)

TY for the tea Kahlia :)

Today is not going to be a good one , I got up late as I am low , which means I won't be able to sleep well , so I get to mull that over all sodding day whilst feeling crap.



I'm still not comfortable in my skin and the anasthetic's slowly wearing thin - Otep
Everyones lost but me! - Indiana Jones

It's okay , they know me here .

Kahlia1981 is my adopted little sister :)


''Courage doesn't always roar , sometimes courage is that little voice at the end of the day that says I'll try again tomorrow"

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Old 08-04-2016, 11:50 AM   #52688
Eir
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*hugs for Mark and Kahlia*
I'm in a weird space. Rather numB. Low-ish, but feel like nothing can touch me.
Last time I was like this, Aphazriel, one of the hallucinations, encouraged me to cut to come back to a feeling being. I'm on anti- psychotics so only quiet voices usually. But no visuals.
I could do an awful lot of damage to myself like this. But without the encouragement I probably won't. There's a want to, but I lack enough motivation, if that makes sense. I'm not sure I want to feel.
I miss my hallucinations. Is that weird?



...I try to outsmart him, but somehow he knows,
Wherever I am, that f***ing dog goes... - Dog, Andy Bull

No matter how bad things get, the true test is how we choose to respond to the pain we suffer, or inflict. - Amenadiel, Lucifer

Why is the path unclear,
When we know hope is near
Understand we'll go hand in hand, but we'll walk alone in fear
~~Margo is my penguin 🐧!!! ~~

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Old 08-04-2016, 01:13 PM   #52689
Doikers
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I don't know what to say Annie , but I don't think that it's weird *Offer Safe Hugs* ( Sorry if I got your name wrong )



I'm still not comfortable in my skin and the anasthetic's slowly wearing thin - Otep
Everyones lost but me! - Indiana Jones

It's okay , they know me here .

Kahlia1981 is my adopted little sister :)


''Courage doesn't always roar , sometimes courage is that little voice at the end of the day that says I'll try again tomorrow"

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Old 08-04-2016, 08:00 PM   #52690
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I don't think you're weird.

Today I find out if I got into residence for college so that's kind of worrying/exciting. I'm a little worried that if I do get in I'll end up living with someone significantly younger than me and I envision that being a problem as far as maturity level and quiet studying goes.. But at least we'd only be sharing communal areas and not bedrooms. I guess this is what I get for putting college off by half a decade after high school :p

I'm sure I wont be the only one though. It'll be good for me to move away from where I am now regardless.

I woke up with a migraine that has since gotten better but I called into work because of it and I feel guilty.

I hope everyone is ok. Sending peace and more snowflakes again, as it's been snowing for a few days straight..










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Old 09-04-2016, 12:02 PM   #52691
Doikers
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Just wanted to wish you all a nice a weekend as it can be :)



I'm still not comfortable in my skin and the anasthetic's slowly wearing thin - Otep
Everyones lost but me! - Indiana Jones

It's okay , they know me here .

Kahlia1981 is my adopted little sister :)


''Courage doesn't always roar , sometimes courage is that little voice at the end of the day that says I'll try again tomorrow"

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Old 09-04-2016, 01:15 PM   #52692
Kahlia1981
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I am really struggling with being in a wheelchair when I could walk perfectly fine only nine weeks ago. I know my appointment with the spinal surgeon is only next Friday but that might have to be delayed because my husband is worried he will go psychotic. If I trusted the local public ward that might be an easy situation which just cost me an appointment but I don't and, without private health insurance, we can't put him in the one private ward we have, so it'll all be up to me. Really don't need this now.

*disappears into her pillow fort to cry*



She shouts, she screams, she smashes your dreams . . .
Would you mind if I killed you? Would you mind if I tried to?
'Cause you have turned into my worst enemy,
You carry hate that I don't feel: It's over now
WHAT HAVE YOU DONE

* Proud Plumeria Sister * My Support Thread * I got lei'd in vets *
* My RYL Family: big brother Doikers; little sisters MammaMia & flutterby butterfly *


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Old 09-04-2016, 01:33 PM   #52693
Doikers
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*Squishes Kahlia* *Offers Hot Chocolate with mini Marshmellows*



I'm still not comfortable in my skin and the anasthetic's slowly wearing thin - Otep
Everyones lost but me! - Indiana Jones

It's okay , they know me here .

Kahlia1981 is my adopted little sister :)


''Courage doesn't always roar , sometimes courage is that little voice at the end of the day that says I'll try again tomorrow"

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Old 09-04-2016, 04:05 PM   #52694
Kahlia1981
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Thanks big brother. *takes hot chocolate, says thank you, and sits down next to Mark enjoying the hot chocolate with mini marshmallows*

I've finally transferred from the wheelchair to the bed and my legs and ankles are thankful but the leg pain, plus the shoulder pain, plus the back pain is more than I can handle.



She shouts, she screams, she smashes your dreams . . .
Would you mind if I killed you? Would you mind if I tried to?
'Cause you have turned into my worst enemy,
You carry hate that I don't feel: It's over now
WHAT HAVE YOU DONE

* Proud Plumeria Sister * My Support Thread * I got lei'd in vets *
* My RYL Family: big brother Doikers; little sisters MammaMia & flutterby butterfly *


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Old 09-04-2016, 04:14 PM   #52695
CaiteeBug
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*flops on couch* Last night's Paranormal investigation totally drained me





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Old 09-04-2016, 06:15 PM   #52696
Doikers
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Hi Caiteebug :) I'm Mark , I dunno if we've met??



I'm still not comfortable in my skin and the anasthetic's slowly wearing thin - Otep
Everyones lost but me! - Indiana Jones

It's okay , they know me here .

Kahlia1981 is my adopted little sister :)


''Courage doesn't always roar , sometimes courage is that little voice at the end of the day that says I'll try again tomorrow"

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Old 10-04-2016, 12:51 AM   #52697
CaiteeBug
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Hi Mark, I'm Caitlyn. I don't think we met. Nice to meet you. I don't usually post on the forums much, more of a chatroom person.





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Old 10-04-2016, 01:46 AM   #52698
Doikers
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Hiya Caitlyn . I can get really freaked out by chat :/



I'm still not comfortable in my skin and the anasthetic's slowly wearing thin - Otep
Everyones lost but me! - Indiana Jones

It's okay , they know me here .

Kahlia1981 is my adopted little sister :)


''Courage doesn't always roar , sometimes courage is that little voice at the end of the day that says I'll try again tomorrow"

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Old 12-04-2016, 02:28 AM   #52699
Kathryn_Anna
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I swear my body hates me. Twisted my ankle, hurt knee still and both are on the right side. 2 kids are sick and down for the count. Hubby has a cold but he acts like it's the end of the world. I get a cold and life goes on as normal because it has to.

Sorry you're in so much pain Kahlia. *offers safe gentle hugs*

Hey Caitlin. Nice to see you out of chat :) It's been awhile!

Any update on residence Drew? Sorry to hear you had a migraine. I know when hubby and I get them we need a dark quiet room to nap for a bit to feel remotely better. I can't imagine working with one. Hopefully it's gone now for you.



Sometimes when I say "I'm okay," I want someone to look me in the eyes, hug me tight, and say "I know you're not."

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Old 12-04-2016, 03:11 AM   #52700
Eir
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Thanks.
Migraines look horrible. My partner gets them, and if he doesn't treat them in time he will throw up for hours. Most definitely wouldn't work with one, but I can understand the feeling horrible about calling in sick. I always feel bad about it, and because of some people calling in regularly we now need to contact the manager for approval to be sick. It's horrible.
Every sore person can have a heat pack shaped like a smiley face from me, if they think it might help.
Odd thing for the day, my phone auto corrects ruinl to think. Which is good cos that's what I was writing.
Still in weird space.



...I try to outsmart him, but somehow he knows,
Wherever I am, that f***ing dog goes... - Dog, Andy Bull

No matter how bad things get, the true test is how we choose to respond to the pain we suffer, or inflict. - Amenadiel, Lucifer

Why is the path unclear,
When we know hope is near
Understand we'll go hand in hand, but we'll walk alone in fear
~~Margo is my penguin 🐧!!! ~~

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