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Old 29-06-2009, 09:42 PM   #18161
CrazyHayley
Is an Incarnated Angel!!
 
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Location: Essex, ENGLAND
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*huggles secrets* your poor feet!! 27hours?!! yikes

*huggles Vicki* Hope physio and other stuff go ok for you, its crappy having to keep going to medical appointments isn't it? but we have to try if we want to improve.

*huggles Arwen* gosh how many sisters have you got?! The heat has wiped me out too, which is never good when I don't have much energy to start off with.

Just been trying to distract myself uploading photos onto truprint and ordering stuff. I thought if I looked at pics and thought of happy times it would help....nope, I just wonder where that happy hayley has gone....if she was ever really there?.....

Not long now til medication and bedtime thank goodness....



"All battles in life serve to teach us something, even the battles we lose"

"There are moments in life when the only possible option is to lose control"

dontwantyoutoknow is my lil sis

I GOT LEI'D IN VETS!!!
I'm a Plumeria Tree!!!


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Old 29-06-2009, 09:43 PM   #18162
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*hugs zowie* the heat is knackering me out as well hope you manage to get some sleep honey

*hugs secrets* good to see you back

*hugs vicki* how you doing?

*hugs crazyhaley* sometimes we just need to cry sweetheart

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Old 29-06-2009, 09:54 PM   #18163
CrazyHayley
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Thanks for the hugs shadowed, how's you? *huggles back*



"All battles in life serve to teach us something, even the battles we lose"

"There are moments in life when the only possible option is to lose control"

dontwantyoutoknow is my lil sis

I GOT LEI'D IN VETS!!!
I'm a Plumeria Tree!!!


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Old 29-06-2009, 10:10 PM   #18164
CrazyHayley
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F*ck, just binged, not big binge, but still.... arrgghhhh.....not got any laxatives......i'm such a ****.....*goes out to smoking shelter*



"All battles in life serve to teach us something, even the battles we lose"

"There are moments in life when the only possible option is to lose control"

dontwantyoutoknow is my lil sis

I GOT LEI'D IN VETS!!!
I'm a Plumeria Tree!!!


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Old 29-06-2009, 10:20 PM   #18165
CrazyHayley
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*sprays self with nice smelling stuff so as to not stink ward out of fags*

Just taken meds.... sleep time soon thank goodness.



"All battles in life serve to teach us something, even the battles we lose"

"There are moments in life when the only possible option is to lose control"

dontwantyoutoknow is my lil sis

I GOT LEI'D IN VETS!!!
I'm a Plumeria Tree!!!


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Old 29-06-2009, 10:35 PM   #18166
CrazyHayley
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****ing hell

sorry for lots of posts to myself and the walls, but I need to stay distracted

Just realised what the date is.
This time 9years ago I was sooo happy.
why?
'cos I knew I was going to kill myself the following day.
Obviously as I am typing this, I ****ed that up.
I wish I hadn't.
How long can I go on struggling?
Someone told me its a choice to either be happy or sad - how we react to a situation.
Well they obviously haven't spent a day in my head!!!
I'm going to bed before I do something stupid.



"All battles in life serve to teach us something, even the battles we lose"

"There are moments in life when the only possible option is to lose control"

dontwantyoutoknow is my lil sis

I GOT LEI'D IN VETS!!!
I'm a Plumeria Tree!!!


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Old 30-06-2009, 01:59 AM   #18167
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Hi everyone.. I'm still here :D

Having a good time with the family but gah.. its so hard having to eat normal meals and yeah.. really not coping with that =[





Jake- my superman <3
Helen- my amazing star <3


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Old 30-06-2009, 04:28 AM   #18168
Kahlia1981
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*hugs everyone*

Got to have my first decent shower since the surgery yesterday. Get one every two days for the next little while. Hope everyone is doing okay. Am getting really sick of only having one arm. :(



She shouts, she screams, she smashes your dreams . . .
Would you mind if I killed you? Would you mind if I tried to?
'Cause you have turned into my worst enemy,
You carry hate that I don't feel: It's over now
WHAT HAVE YOU DONE

* Proud Plumeria Sister * My Support Thread * I got lei'd in vets *
* My RYL Family: big brother Doikers; little sisters MammaMia & flutterby butterfly *


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Old 30-06-2009, 11:04 AM   #18169
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*hugs Kahlia* I bet you are, enjoy the shower :)

*hugs Katie* glad you're having a good time, I'm also back at home and struggling with the whole shear amount of food they expect me to eat, but you are doing really well :)

*cuddles Hayley* I think that person is wrong about happy and sad,we are the fighters, fighting for happiness when life just seems to bring sadness, and we'll get there one day :) I'm glad you ****ed up and are still here, hope you slept okay.

*hugs Shadowedseraph* hope you are okay

*hugs Arwen* your little sister sounds very difficult LOL I went to the job centre yesterday as well :P

*hugs Vicki* I hope you find the strength to make another appointment

*hugs Secrets* I hope you slept well

*hugs Shadowedsoul* hope you're feeling better today

*hugs Cheryl* hope the cpn meeting went ok

*hugs Kat* hope today is going better

*hugs Helen* sorry to hear about the flashbacks hun, take care of yourself, okay?

*hugs Dayna**hugs Hannahbanana**hugs Jem**hugs Gil**hugs anyone else around*

well, I went and left my phone in a shop yesterday, had to go back at 9am this morning, nobody had found it, but I asked the shop assistant to phone it and there is was nestled in a basket of bracelets - doh - I am such a scatty bint LOL anyway I'm supposed to be working so I better get going although I don't feel bad as I don't get paid :P I want the sunshine back, the sky is dull and grey.



"I am me and me is good enough if I would only be it openly"

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Old 30-06-2009, 11:25 AM   #18170
shadowedseraph
 
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*hugs crazyhaley* I'm glad you f***ed up i like having you around! the person who told you we are either happy or sad is a moron we can be any number of different things :)

*hugs Kahalia* Hurrah for showers in this heat

*hugs wildilyinsane* well done for finding your phone :)

-------

I'm just unhappy, its too hot, i can't sleep, can't eat, can't be arsed. Oh well

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Old 30-06-2009, 12:54 PM   #18171
Kahlia1981
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*hugs all*

voices are bad tonight. am just trying to hold it together. wishing i could sleep but then i'd be awake in a few hours anyway with nothing to do.



She shouts, she screams, she smashes your dreams . . .
Would you mind if I killed you? Would you mind if I tried to?
'Cause you have turned into my worst enemy,
You carry hate that I don't feel: It's over now
WHAT HAVE YOU DONE

* Proud Plumeria Sister * My Support Thread * I got lei'd in vets *
* My RYL Family: big brother Doikers; little sisters MammaMia & flutterby butterfly *


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Old 30-06-2009, 01:33 PM   #18172
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*hugs Strawberry* I'm sorry your appointment was cancelled.

*hugs zowie* little sisters are there to be annoying I'm sure they must be born with a manual in how to annoy older siblings.

*hugs CrazyHayley* Don't apologise for posting, I'm glad you're still here, you will get through this. The person who said you can only be happy or sad is wrong, you can have many emotions at one time.

*hugs shadowed seraph* it is weird weather it needs to rain and be over with it then be sunny.

*hugs Big bear* am thinking of you.

*hugs Kahila*

*hugs wildly insane* thats made me smile, thanks

I'm hiding out in here today. I wish people would stop shouting at me, I don't understand why I'm not allowed to say anything back. I just want to cry but time to get on with the day

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Old 30-06-2009, 02:17 PM   #18173
CrazyHayley
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*huggles big bear* focus on the good times with family. Keep trying and you'll get through this hard time with food & stuff.

*huggles Kahlia* hurrah for the progress after surgery on the showers! How long will you be one armed for?! Hope you're holding it together, focus on RYL and do your best to ignore the voices.

*huggles Hannah* thanks for the support and oh my goodness, how do you loose your phone in some bracelets?! I'm glad you got it back though, I'd be panic stricken without my phone! Oh and come down to Essex if you want the sunshine, its still here in vast amounts.

*huggles shadowedseraph* thank you too for the support. Have an air condtioning unit and a nice cold drink to cool you down....(if only real life were magic like the ward )...I hope the day improves for you.

*huggles secrets* thanks to you too for words and hugs of support. Its horrid when people shout at you but why are you not allowed to say anything back? That seems very unfair if you don't get your say ....
though I don't say anything in those type of situations as I'm normally in tears and too stunned and only think of things after the incident.

*goes round ward to give huggles to Hannahbanana, Vicki, Arwen, Alyssa, Ally, Helen, Jem and any others who are snuggled up in corners*


So then, my day so far hasn't been as bad as I thought it might have been. Hurrah!! Though my back has gone into spasm not so hurrah.... and so I'm doped up on lots of pain meds, so perhaps thats why things don't seem as bad?!!!



"All battles in life serve to teach us something, even the battles we lose"

"There are moments in life when the only possible option is to lose control"

dontwantyoutoknow is my lil sis

I GOT LEI'D IN VETS!!!
I'm a Plumeria Tree!!!


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Old 30-06-2009, 04:11 PM   #18174
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Would leave individual replies but am too tired.
Had my interview for the access course today, I think it went well. Fingers crossed.
Catch up with you all later xxx



-
x Plumeria Sister x
-
Forever thankful to RYL
<3


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Old 30-06-2009, 08:14 PM   #18175
Strawberry.Bananas
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*big hugs to all*

How is everybody?



"Can I ever be truly whole again...



...after being broken so many times?"



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Old 30-06-2009, 09:23 PM   #18176
zowie
 
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Hi Vicki *hugs back* I'm okay. It's my sister's birthday so people have been in and out the house a lot. Glad I'm not feeling grumpy.
My grandparents gave me a pouch of baccy for my unbirthday :D
How are you? xx



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x Plumeria Sister x
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Forever thankful to RYL
<3


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Old 30-06-2009, 09:34 PM   #18177
shadowedseraph
 
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*hugs to all on the ward* Sorry im just too hot to do individual replies Hope everyone is keeping as well as is possible. I just want it all to go away *curls up in a corner and cries*

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Old 30-06-2009, 11:18 PM   #18178
Damnation.
I'm breaking down, and it's because of you
 
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I had two dreams about this thread last night o__O. First one, Kahlia was asking what my mood was because apparently it wasn't showing, and I said it was set as 'unsafe' (o.o;;), and in the second one, this thread was deleted.

Lolwut?




Ness,Ness,Ness,Ness,Ness,Ness,Ness,Ness,Ness, Ness,Ness,Ness,Ness,Ness,Ness,Ness,Ness,Ness, Ness,Ness,Ness,Ness,Ness,Ness,Ness,Ness,Ness, Ness,Ness,Ness,Ness,Ness,Ness.
I'm...h...a...p...p...y...


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Old 30-06-2009, 11:42 PM   #18179
PapaBear
Shayne, legally, as of 7/14/09
 
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*comes in to give everyone hugs, love, and a shoulder to cry on for those who need one*

I'm safe, but I need to get away from a ton of drama and stress that friends have stuck me in the middle of. Gotta take some time away before it puts me in "that place" again

*grabs a pillow and blankie and settles down for a while*

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Old 30-06-2009, 11:56 PM   #18180
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Hey guys, how did I manage to lose my phone in bracelets? hmm who knows, I was meeting a friend so had my phone in my hand in case she phoned, I was therefore thinking to myself, must not forget phone, must not forget phone, then she turned up we went to try on some bracelets, put phone down and forgot to pick it up again - doh :P

I'm good today, have a little positive vibe running through me, don't know how long it'll hang around, but am happy it's there for the moment.

Hiya Jazz, make yourself comfy :) if you ever wanna talk we're here to listen

*hugs Dayna* how are you? dreaming about RYL huh, I wonder what that means?

*cuddles ShadowedSeraph* anything we can help with?

*hugs Arwen* my fingers are crossed for you, hope you survived your sisters birthday

*hugs Hayley* I hope the rest of your day was okay and your back isn't giving you grief any more

*hugs Secrets* hope your day got better and there was no more shouting, that sounds unfair to me.

*hugs Kahlia* hope you're okay, don't let those voices win

*hugs Vicki* are you feeling any better?

*hugs everyone else around and leaves strawberries and cream and some champagne for everyone :D*


Last edited by wildly insane : 30-06-2009 at 11:56 PM. Reason: moving things


"I am me and me is good enough if I would only be it openly"

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