Following my BPD dx I've started to realise a lot of emotions and feelings that I've never been aware of even feeling before, so I've decided keeping a diary would be useful to get things off my chest as I feel like no one else wants to hear what I have to say, also it would be useful to show my psych as I forget everything I want to say when I get there.
I've never written a diary or anything before and I struggle to put my feelings into words... Does anyone have any tips or advice they could share that might make it a bit easier for me?
Thankies x
The three grand essentials of happiness are: Something to do, Someone to love, and Something to hope
I've been keeping a daily journal since I was 11 [I'm now 43] so it's pretty much second nature for me so hard to delineate. Let me have a think and get back to you. :)
I tend to write in bullets if I struggle with prose. It's different for everyone. Some people choose poetry or doodles, or song lyrics. Some people write spider diagrams.
I keep sketchbooks. I find it far more easy to express myself that way, rather than words, but I do write notes down too. Could you maybe start off with small notes and sketches or collage? That might help you eventually find the words.
I keep a journal, I have done for quite a few years now. I usually like blank pages because then I can draw/sketch as well as writing journal entries, poems, short stories. I like to keep little keepsakes for example travel tickets from visiting family I don't see often, or restaurant bills from special meals out to celebrate birthdays, anniversaries, special occasions etc, so I stick them to pages and write about what happened. My journals end up looking like doorstops because they're kind of a journal, diary, short story/poem book, sketch book, scrap book all combined together.
When writing about my feelings, thoughts and emotions and such I often started off writing "I don't know what to write..." then something might pop into my head, and I'd write down what ever thought/emotion/feeling it was, and then I'd just take it from there and see what came out of my pen onto the page. I try to remind myself that there's no pressure when writing to write something poetic or incredibly insightful into how you're feeling, simply because sometimes you just don't know how you're feeling.
Also playing around with the medium can help I've found, if sitting at white lined paper with a black pen seems boring then trying different coloured paper or coloured pens might be worth a try. Or making collages or writing down song lyrics that you relate to can be useful ways to access feelings.
I guess sometimes it's a case of trying different things and finding out what works for you
Some really good ideas there, thanks people :) I do quite like the suggestion of using bullet points whirlpools, likewise bridgesandballons I think you're mixture of a bit of everything could be also something I might have a to at.
Big thanks for the replies :) going to take what you've all said and try each way and see what works best for me.
The three grand essentials of happiness are: Something to do, Someone to love, and Something to hope
I too have been writing journals since about 11-12, and I'm now 22.
I would say find some privacy. Don't let anyone interrupt you, and keep it close to you and away from prying eyes if you're concerned someone may break that trust.
Just write whatever you feel like. Don't think about it, just write, almost unconciously. It might be hard to think about, but even if you just start with writing about things that happened, then just letting yourself go with what you think or feel about those emotions.
Even if you can only express it in a scribble, or writing 4 words in big angry letters, anything.
It is a really good method of identifying emotions and situations that made you feel certain ways, and as well at containing those emotions whilst still expressing them - so instead o getting super upset and angry and hurting someone or yourself, you are still processing without causing any harm to yourself or others.
It doesn't matter if you don't 100% mean what you write, or if you fantasize about scenarios or doing things to people, it's fine. It's venting. Often I write hit lists and whatnot in my diary and fantasise about doing nasty things to people who have been nasty to me or someone I love - but I don't do it - else I'd be in prison a million times over by now, but it's fine. Just let it go.
I have tried having a journal but find it to difficult as I need it to look perfect. So I use a blog instead which I find much easier, I tend to find a picture to how I feel and write a few short sentences. I find it rather helpful to get things out that way.
'Cause I'll always remember you the same.
Oh eyes like wild flowers within demons of change ♥
