Contains abuse - Im done .... - Page 3

Darkwings44 · 02-08-2019, 01:08 AM

i feel like dieing would be a gift.... i mean no onew would care....

one_step_closer · 02-08-2019, 11:12 AM

That's a painful feeling to have. Why do you think no one would care?

Darkwings44 · 06-08-2019, 10:08 PM

Because I’m worthless.....

one_step_closer · 07-08-2019, 02:47 PM

I can understand why you'd feel like that if people aren't treating you well. You do have worth though, and I'm sure there are people out there who think that of you.

Darkwings44 · 08-08-2019, 10:27 PM

thank you.....

Darkwings44 · 29-08-2019, 10:29 PM

ive been feeling like total shit...... i really dont know whats worth living.....

Darkwings44 · 29-08-2019, 10:47 PM

[hide="[HIDE="im happy!!"this memorial weekend im supposed to go to my familys house.... and act happy but.. i cant help but think of ways that i could die while im at their house.... i want a end to the suffering GOD DAMN ME!!!!!

]

one_step_closer · 30-08-2019, 04:25 PM

I'm sorry you're feeling so awful. What kind of life would be worth living for, in your opinion? What is your 'suffering'? Maybe we could help you find ways to ease it.

Darkwings44 · 05-09-2019, 11:47 PM

A life with no hurt.....
There’s a lot of people that are hurting me and I have to take it because they can’t be stopped because they have a legal way of doing it (they are cops and they have connections so they don’t have to go to jail for it)

one_step_closer · 06-09-2019, 12:26 PM

I don't think a life with absolutely no hurt is possible, but less hurt should definitely be possible. That sounds very wrong if the police are hurting you, does anyone know what is happening?

Darkwings44 · 07-09-2019, 06:33 PM

Ok I’ll try.....
No one that cares......

one_step_closer · 08-09-2019, 11:08 AM

Are there people in your life who you feel do care, who you could speak to?

not_so_insig · 08-09-2019, 01:26 PM

Is there no police complaints procedure you could go to? Here in the UK we have the police complaints commission. If they are truly hurting you it may be worth complaining about them. Similarly is there no local newspapers that you could complain to?

Darkwings44 · 29-09-2019, 03:22 PM

I can’t..... they wont listen to me

Ive tried to jump out of the day hab bus but it didn’t work

one_step_closer · 29-09-2019, 03:28 PM

Have you tried to report them? Maybe your therapist could advise you on what to do. It sounds like it's causing you a lot of distress.

Darkwings44 · 03-10-2019, 09:55 PM

yes but they wont listen to me.....

yeah.....i feel soooo stupid and very mad at myself that i wasn't strong enough to open the bus doors to jump out!!! i cant even die right what the hell makes me think that i can actually go to collage and be a writer if i cant even succeed at my death and if even people not even trying to succeed at their deaths die every day!!!!! >=| but... i have a appointment with the Texas work commission about me going to collage but i have to take a test to test my knowledge to see where i place so they can see if i actually can go to collage that has no study guide!! :( im stressing out about it!!!!!!!!!! but now i dont have to worry about paying for collage because the lady on the phone said that they will pay for everything and that i wont have to pay them back. so thats a good thing

Darkwings44 · 10-10-2019, 10:43 PM

ive been having a good week so far ( but i really dont wanna mess it up....) today i got my hair cut and i get to go out to eat with the group home...(useully we eat at home) and i have met with Texas work commission and appiled and got quilified so now i gotta wait until the the next appiontment to see whats the next step

Darkwings44 · 12-10-2019, 05:39 PM

I thought that i was good for a while but I feel like shit right now I have a plan but I’m not sure if it will succeed but I gotta try..... i cant live any longer!!!!!!!

one_step_closer · 12-10-2019, 07:08 PM

I'm sorry you're struggling. The fact that you felt a bit better before shows that it's possible for you to have good times, and it sounds like you have some good things hopefully coming up in the future. Life has a lot of ups and downs. If you have a plan you really need to let someone know, there is support out there for you.

Darkwings44 · 15-10-2019, 09:53 PM

I tryed the plan and it failed mainly because of people that were around when I was gonna do it and I also tryed one other thing and it didn’t work out because of my aunt was there so I couldn’t go over the small wall and into the freeway.............
yeah I found out that there is a meeting next week for the Texas work commission about the next step..... but the bad things out weigh the good things in my life and I don’t see any point in trying to live if there is no hope for the good to out weigh the bad.....
Ive been thinking about life and death and if life is the opposite of death then wouldn’t it be better to die than to live?