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Short sleeves!
I just wanted to share what has been a huge step forward for me, in terms of accepting my scars and dealing with my negative thoughts of them. I've been recovered from self harm for over 3 years now, but i'm still very much ashamed of my scars. I hate how they look, and I get very nervous about what others might think of them and of me. Because of that, despite being recovered for so long, I still haven't had the courage to wear short sleeves or show my arms to anyone.
However i'm currently by myself, in a foreign country and decided that since i'm not going to ever see anyone I pass by here ever again once i'm home, that for once in my life i'm not going to be sweltering in the heat because I am ashamed. So for the first time in over 6 years I took my cardigan off, and honestly it feels great. I was nervous at first and found myself sub-consciously crossing my arms or tucking them in at my sides to try and hide, but after a while I found that really, people don't notice. I think I saw some people glance at my arms, but nobody has said anything or stared or anything like that.
Today, just 2 days after I took off my long sleeves for the first time, I found myself walking around with more confidence than I have in the last 6 years and I had the biggest smile on my face and I finally felt free. Honestly i'm not sure i'll be able to do this once i'm back in my home town where I know people and will be with my friends, instead of by myself. But I feel like this is such a huge step forward to me that I just wanted to share and encourage anyone else who has the same insecurities as me, that it is do-able and all the worries I had previously, I found didn't happen.
Thank you for reading :)
Last edited by Palladion : 03-08-2014 at 05:03 AM.
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