I completely agree about the "fate" part. For me making friends is down to meeting a person you just "click" with, it's not an action you can take whenever you want to.
You asked me a very, very interesting question that made me ponder for a while. Is it important to me to make new connections quickly? I guess it's just something every person I went to for advice and every article on the Internet suggested. Miss someone? Go to your friends for support. Don't have friends? Go out there and make new friends. I think while it is important to me to build at least some new connections and to have at least one person I can talk to face to face and hug, I am in no hurry to do so. I am not scared of being alone for a while, it's nothing new to me and I cope with it rather well. I am just scared of being alone forever, or at least for a period of time that would feel like forever, say, over 10 years, and those fears are based on having little faith in being able to form new connections ever again.
A couple of years ago I experienced a traumatic situation involving another friend I was incredibly attached to, and it had a massive impact on my lifestyle and beliefs. Basically, before the situation, I had a belief it's easier for me to make friends with males because I have a male-dominated profession, and rather "ungirly" nerdy interests and preferences, and also because guys are often more direct about their thoughts and desires and it makes it easier for me as a person on a spectrum. After the situation I concluded I was a complete moron, no one wants to be my friend because I'm unlikeable and that's why I had zero female friends in my lifetime, and men only talk to me because they misinterpret my friendliness as being easy like Sunday morning. Naturally, I stopped going out, became a lot less open and insta-friendly to new people, and generally lost hope to ever make any new friends. After a while I was able to accept it with a little bit of sadness, and be content that I at least have one true friend. And then he left and now I feel totally alone.
But I am not in a rush to make new friends. If anything, I think I need a little bit of time to process what happened before I can meet new people without being overly needy with them or talking off their ears about how sad I feel. I just wish I had someone to talk to about everything that is going on, but this site and all the incredible people that support me in this thread are more than enough, thank you very much!