RYL Forums


Forum Jump
Post New Thread  Reply
Old 25-05-2019, 09:06 PM   #1
activebrain
activebrain
 
activebrain's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2019
Location: Ohio
I am currently:
Priceless or worthless? * contains sexual abuse*

So I just finished helping my cousin prepare for an upcoming yard sale and I left and realize I had a tag Stuck on Me that had her initials on it and it says $1. I texted her and said I guess I'm part of the yard sale now and you get to sell me for $1 or something like that. I had said it jokingly and she texted back LOL however you're priceless. I really appreciated her kind words and then I started thinking about how my father sold me for almost 30 years to other people to be raped and how I obviously was not Priceless to him because I had a price. I don't know for how much he sold me all the time that I have a vague idea and it really is showing me that I'm not worth very much at all. In fact I feel cheap and tawdry and completely worthless when I think about everything he did to me. So maybe that dollar tag is pretty accurate. Or maybe a more accurate price tag would have been make offer she's cheap.



I am still me no matter what SIZEor shape I am!

activebrain is offline   Reply With Quote
One Hug Given By:
Old 27-05-2019, 10:57 AM   #2
Pi.R^2
Pathologically flamboyant
 
Pi.R^2's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: Safety Cupboard
I am currently:

Hi there,

I'm sorry that what started out as a nice comment from your cousin has reminded you of the abuse that your father put you through, it's utterly horrific what he did. Your cousin is right that you are priceless; try to hold on to her words rather than your father's crimes. Have you ever had any professional help to deal with the abuse that you suffered?



No other sadness in the world would do


Pi.R^2 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 27-05-2019, 11:32 AM   #3
activebrain
activebrain
 
activebrain's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2019
Location: Ohio
I am currently:

I see a trauma-based therapist. And I'm waiting to get into a trauma Treatment Center. I'm on the waitlist and the wait is killing me



I am still me no matter what SIZEor shape I am!

activebrain is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 27-05-2019, 10:38 PM   #4
Pi.R^2
Pathologically flamboyant
 
Pi.R^2's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: Safety Cupboard
I am currently:

I'm glad you have a therapist and are at least on a waiting list for the treatment center. Do you have any idea how long you will have to wait for it? Have you learnt any skills/strategies from your therapy sessions that can help you manage in the meantime?



No other sadness in the world would do


Pi.R^2 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 28-05-2019, 12:10 AM   #5
activebrain
activebrain
 
activebrain's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2019
Location: Ohio
I am currently:

As to the waitlist, no clue. I know all sorts of techniques that I could use and I just get so depressed that I am literally debilitated and can do nothing. I do appreciate your support though. Just spent four hours in the ER today and I'm just super frustrated from it.



I am still me no matter what SIZEor shape I am!

activebrain is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-06-2019, 06:15 PM   #6
Pi.R^2
Pathologically flamboyant
 
Pi.R^2's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: Safety Cupboard
I am currently:

Oh I'm sorry you're struggling so much and that the ER was frustrating; do you want to talk about it?

Could you maybe make a list of the possible techniques and identifying some low effort ones that might help when you are very depressed?



No other sadness in the world would do


Pi.R^2 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-06-2019, 06:40 PM   #7
activebrain
activebrain
 
activebrain's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2019
Location: Ohio
I am currently:

I actually have a list of all the different things that I can do when I'm feeling having the urge I should say to self harm or other behaviors that are not helpful. All too often though I look at the list and go (razzberry). I had a few days where I felt really good and was very motivated and did a whole bunch of really cool things and felt good about myself. Now I'm back to blech and unmotivated and wanting to hurt myself. My life is a constant yo-yo.



I am still me no matter what SIZEor shape I am!

activebrain is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 16-06-2019, 01:09 PM   #8
Pi.R^2
Pathologically flamboyant
 
Pi.R^2's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: Safety Cupboard
I am currently:

I'm glad you've got a list, though I can appreciate it being hard to motivate yourself to do things from it when you're not feeling good. I think it would be worth keeping on trying though!

How have you been the past few weeks?



No other sadness in the world would do


Pi.R^2 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 16-06-2019, 01:12 PM   #9
activebrain
activebrain
 
activebrain's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2019
Location: Ohio
I am currently:

Miserable and in constant crisis. Need a hospital desperately. If you read my post in the serious discussion under tired of being in pain you'll see how awful things have been. Thanks for asking



I am still me no matter what SIZEor shape I am!

activebrain is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply


Currently Active Members Viewing This Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
 
Thread Tools Search this Thread
Search this Thread:

Advanced Search

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

vB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Censor is ON
Forum Jump


Sea Pink Aroma
All times are GMT +1. The time now is 11:56 AM.