Worried

[Stellata]

What might help?

[Cacoethes]

I'm not sure
I need to stop thinking these thoughts but it's proving difficult

[Stellata]

It's like don't think of a giraffe, oh, a giraffe?

[Cacoethes]

Sounds about right
It just won't go away

[EyelinerAndCigarettes]

Sounds like an obvious question but is there anything - no matter how small - that distracts you from the thoughts?
Sending love

[Cacoethes]

I'm trying to distract myself by playing games on my phone and watching TV
The thoughts keep creeping in and becoming overpowering

Thanks

[EyelinerAndCigarettes]

It's great you're trying to distract yourself even though you're struggling so much, that shows real bravery.

[Cacoethes]

Thank you
That means a lot

[one_step_closer]

Is there a way to take notice of the thoughts, just to say 'ok brain I hear you', and then let them go? I know it's hard not to get caught up in scary thoughts, distraction is a very good idea if you can keep it up. You don't have to let the thoughts have too much power.

[Cacoethes]

I have tried but it is hard
I am still trying to distract but even that is getting exhausting
Only just woken up and I already want to go back to bed

[one_step_closer]

Yeah, I get that it's hard. I know that people say a lot of what makes thoughts distressing is the interpretation and weight you give them so keep trying. If you can label them as just anxious thoughts then anxious thoughts are 'ok' and nothing to get really worked up about. Are there distractions that don't take up too much energy?

[Cacoethes]

Currently distracting by playing games on my phone and watching a series on Netflix

I feel weird
Like my heart is beating on the wrong side and I think I can hear the microchip again

[one_step_closer]

You know that there wasn't a microchip before though, so whatever it is you're hearing it's not that. It sounds like you're feeling panicky and focusing on stuff a lot. I know that it's easier said than done to stay distracted but keep trying. Is there someone you can talk to if you need to?

[Cacoethes]

But what if it is there?
I am trying to stay distracted
I don't know who to talk to
111 would send an ambulance if I was completely honest and I don't need that
I don't think I could call the crisis team because I'm not under them

[one_step_closer]

If you spoke to someone what would you want them to do for you? Do you think a psych nurse would understand better? I think here you can phone 111 and ask to speak to a psych nurse, not sure if that’s the same with you.

[Cacoethes]

I don't know
I'm not even sure it's a mental health problem but it's so distressing and I want it to stop
Want to OD but I don't have the right meds
Not to die just to make it all stop for a bit

[EyelinerAndCigarettes]

I'm sorry you're hurting so much right now, sweet.

I wonder if you feel it would help to try and call 111 or the alternative in your area? (Even just to chat to someone, they may be able to refer you to the crisis team so you could then speak to them?) I can also really relate to wanting everything to stop for a little bit, although I'm very glad you don't have the medication to OD on.

[Cacoethes]

Thank you

I could try 111 but I worry about them sending an ambulance which wouldn't be good
I took my meds early tonight so I'm hoping I'll be able to sleep soon

[EyelinerAndCigarettes]

It's understandable you're worried about them calling an ambulance. If you can't sleep soon do you have anything you could do to keep you occupied?

[Cacoethes]

I don't really have a lot to keep me occupied
I'm thinking a lot
Can't keep concentration with anything
I am getting tired which is good