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Old 30-09-2017, 01:44 AM   #1
lilred
 
Join Date: Feb 2012
I don't even want to stop

I started cutting again about two weeks ago after about a year clean (minus one or two slip ups). In the last 12 days, I have cut multiple times every day. I don't even care, and I'm not even trying to stop. I just let myself cut whenever I want and it feels kinda good not to have the pressure of trying to stop. What is gonna make me want to stop?

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Old 30-09-2017, 09:14 PM   #2
one_step_closer
The Shadow of the Day
 
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Join Date: Oct 2004
Location: Scotland

I think that when you slip up it can be really easy to get back into the pattern of self harming. It is quite a pressure when you're trying to stop and you have done so well with being about a year free. Hopefully with time you will feel more able to get back on the road to recovery, I don't think there's anything you can do to 'make' you want to stop. What has helped you stay self harm free before?





I put it down on paper and then the ghost does not ache so much.

Don't try to calm the storm, calm yourself, the storm will pass.

You didn't come this far just to come this far.


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Old 03-10-2017, 09:59 PM   #3
Soccerbabe8
 
Join Date: Aug 2017

I'm dealing with exactly this right now. 2 years clean and I let myself slip once, once turned into so bad that I just cut without even thinking, everyday . I relate so incredibly much to what you are feeling...i know I should stop but I don't want to. And that bothers me becuase I know I have to want to stop.....its like on too of the stress that cussed my si, I fight with myself about doing it. Unless i don't....and that feels good.

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Old 25-10-2017, 07:15 AM   #4
A_Moments_Notice
 
Join Date: Oct 2017
Location: U.S.A.

I've been there for 12 years. I had 2 years free, and I slipped up this year. It went on for a month. I haven't since Aug.

It will be on you. For me writing helped me. It let me express what I had to say that was in my mind. It gave me an outlet. Music gives me another outlet. It gives me things to relate to. I use to color. Now I read stories. I always have a book with me. Or I read other's stories about their recovery. I started reaching out to a few people who care and know. They have a past history with it as well, so they can relate. Therapy can sometimes help.

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