Triggering (SI) - Slip with SI

Sandy · 22-09-2007, 05:10 PM

I had a rough night last night,things were building up inside of me and I was holding on for three weeks without doing any SI,but last night,I did slip. I feel soo guilty and feel bad for what I did. I am having trouble with friendship,making them and keeping them,it is really starting to bother me. I am getting along with my boy-friend without no problems. What is wrong with me,I am sooo angry with myself right now,and it is not easy for me to forgive myself. I just feel depressed about everything that is going on,just do not know what to do. Any support and advice will be great. I just do not feel so great right now. hanging in there. I will be back later

Tig · 23-09-2007, 12:02 PM

(((Sandy)))

Well done on managing 3 weeks without self harm, that is an excellent thing to do and although you slipped up it has given you a break from self harm and hope that you can do it again. You did well to manage 3 weeks, it is better than not having tried at all.
You musn't beat yourself up for having slipped up, it is understandable that you feel guilty and bad but everyone has slips up at times, whatever they are trying to change or do and feeling guilty over it will just make you feel worse and turn it in to a catch-22 situation. It can be hard to forgive ourselves so perhaps it will be easier for you to accept that you did slip up but that you can continue with your success.
Have you always had trouble with friendships? I'm not that good at giving advise about friendships and relationships but I hope somebody else can come and give their insight in to that.
I am glad you are hanging in there, you can PM me if you want to chat or whatever. You aren't alone in all this,

Lotti
xxx

Sandy · 23-09-2007, 02:20 PM

Thanks for the nice messages. I alway have trouble with friendship,that I can remember.It is hard for me in that area. I know that I have slip with SI,and I am trying very hard to forgive myself,but I am trying. I will PM you later on,when I come back on. I am doing alright so far,and doing positive things for myself.I also wrote something in the Mental Health forum. Thanks for being such a nice person. I will be alright. taking care of myself. Be back on later

crazykat · 23-09-2007, 02:43 PM

*Massive hugs*
I know its hard when you slip up, I find it hard to forgive myself either. What you gotta understand is that slipping up is all part of recovery and recovery takes time, so we are bound to have slip ups along the way. Whats impotant is tho that you have realise you have slipped up and you dust yourself off and get up again. Hold on to those three weeks you did make it through without SH tho and be proud that you made it that far. Just because you made a slip up doesn't mean its all over, every day is a new chance to start over again. I know what its like to have trouble with friendships i struggle with that too, so I am not really able to offer any advice on that. Keep going you can continue to fight this and you seem to have a postive attitude towards this so thats a start. If you ever need anything feel free to PM. Take care of yourself
Kat xxx

blackness · 23-09-2007, 02:58 PM

Firstly congrats on going 3 weeks without harming. So you've relapsed, it doesnt matter, what matter is that you lasted those weeks, which is proof to yourself that you can do it again. We can't expect to give up it all together there will be down times when we feel the urge, sometimes we can fight it, sometimes we can't. Focus on what you've done.
try not to feel guilty or disappointed with yourself, it's normal to give in sometimes in the process of "giving up". Making friendships is tough, but time will help you.

Sandy · 23-09-2007, 04:57 PM

Thanks for the nice messages,you all made me feel better. I did my nails and then I will write in my journal. I am looking for a pen pal,if anyone wants to be one. I am doing alright,and I am taking it easy and relaxing. I am glad to be back on here,you are all supportive. I feel better,and I know that I slip with SI,and I am starting all over again. I wish I could find a SI bracelet,I do not have that much money,so if anyone can help me find one,please let me know. I will be alright,taking care of myself. I will be back later