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05-03-2019, 07:13 PM
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#261
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The Shadow of the Day
Join Date: Oct 2004
Location: Scotland
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I'm glad the appointment went fairly well, I hope the other ones go well. It's definitely ok to take some time to rest, you've been full of anxiety about the appointments and that's bound to further drain you. Be kind to yourself.
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I put it down on paper and then the ghost does not ache so much.
Don't try to calm the storm, calm yourself, the storm will pass.
You didn't come this far just to come this far.
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10-03-2019, 10:01 PM
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#262
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Join Date: Oct 2007
Location: UK
I am currently:
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I could do with something. I feel I don't matter unless I self harm. I'm insanely jealous of people who have recently. I want to self harm badly but I've work tomorrow and not enough money to go visit a friend next weekend AND go to a and e tonight. I want somone to tell me that I don't need to self harm for them to see I'm struggling. I'm really low and really really on the edge of cutting. I feel like a failure at life.
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Given enough tea I could rule the world.
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10-03-2019, 10:02 PM
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#263
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Join Date: Oct 2007
Location: UK
I am currently:
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My meeting with my new cpn went terribly and I don't like her.
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Given enough tea I could rule the world.
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11-03-2019, 02:38 PM
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#264
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Valerie
Join Date: Oct 2014
I am currently:
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I'm sorry it didn't go well. What went wrong?
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11-03-2019, 03:02 PM
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#265
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Join Date: Oct 2007
Location: UK
I am currently:
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I don't know I can't quantify it I just feel it went terribly. Everything is terrible rn.
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Given enough tea I could rule the world.
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11-03-2019, 04:44 PM
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#266
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The Shadow of the Day
Join Date: Oct 2004
Location: Scotland
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I'm sorry everything feels terrible. Do you think you can give the relationship with your CPN a bit of time to develop and hopefully it will improve as you get to know each other? I know you need someone right now though. You do matter and you are not a failure.
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I put it down on paper and then the ghost does not ache so much.
Don't try to calm the storm, calm yourself, the storm will pass.
You didn't come this far just to come this far.
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11-03-2019, 07:37 PM
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#267
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Join Date: Oct 2007
Location: UK
I am currently:
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I don't want to have to get to know someone else though. I know I sound like a spoilt child though.
Thank you.
I'm craving self harm. To be looked after.
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Given enough tea I could rule the world.
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11-03-2019, 07:40 PM
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#268
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The Shadow of the Day
Join Date: Oct 2004
Location: Scotland
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I understand that, it would be much better if you could have a longstanding supportive relationship with someone. I'm sorry you don't have that right now.
I also understand wanting to self harm to be looked after, and it's really sad that you feel like that's what you'd have to do to be looked after. What would being looked after look like/feel like? I hope there would be another way that you could get some comfort and support from someone.
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I put it down on paper and then the ghost does not ache so much.
Don't try to calm the storm, calm yourself, the storm will pass.
You didn't come this far just to come this far.
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11-03-2019, 07:44 PM
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#269
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Join Date: Oct 2007
Location: UK
I am currently:
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Thank you.
I want someone to be with rn. Someone to spill my head to in person who understands. I'm not sure that's all of it but that's all I can verbalise.
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Given enough tea I could rule the world.
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11-03-2019, 07:46 PM
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#270
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The Shadow of the Day
Join Date: Oct 2004
Location: Scotland
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I know. A person, just someone there with you who listens and won't judge can be an amazing relief. Are there no people like that in your personal life right now? Are there any support services where you could talk to someone?
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I put it down on paper and then the ghost does not ache so much.
Don't try to calm the storm, calm yourself, the storm will pass.
You didn't come this far just to come this far.
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11-03-2019, 07:55 PM
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#271
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Join Date: Oct 2007
Location: UK
I am currently:
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The last time I spoke to ooh I took an od that should have killed me because of them. I haven't got over how unhelpful they were.
I've message a friend. It says I want to die but don't think I'll act on it. Which is true.
And now I'm crying
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Given enough tea I could rule the world.
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11-03-2019, 08:07 PM
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#272
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The Shadow of the Day
Join Date: Oct 2004
Location: Scotland
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Oh Lillie. I'm glad you've messaged a friend anyway. Is this friend usually helpful?
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I put it down on paper and then the ghost does not ache so much.
Don't try to calm the storm, calm yourself, the storm will pass.
You didn't come this far just to come this far.
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11-03-2019, 08:11 PM
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#273
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Join Date: Oct 2007
Location: UK
I am currently:
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Not sure I can stay safe. I am so sad.
The friend is trying.
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Given enough tea I could rule the world.
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12-03-2019, 06:31 AM
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#274
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Valerie
Join Date: Oct 2014
I am currently:
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Are you okay? Did you manage to stay safe? I'm sorry everything is so tough and support is so hard to find.
Was your friend able to support you?
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12-03-2019, 07:30 AM
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#275
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Join Date: Oct 2007
Location: UK
I am currently:
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I ended up in A and E.
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Given enough tea I could rule the world.
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12-03-2019, 08:30 AM
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#276
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Join Date: Jun 2007
I am currently:
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*hugs and love*
How are you doing now? Were they able to treat you and/or get you any support?
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It's a long way down
On this rollercoaster.
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12-03-2019, 11:26 AM
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#277
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Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: U.K.
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Sorry you had to go to A&E. How are you now? Sending love.
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12-03-2019, 03:52 PM
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#278
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The Shadow of the Day
Join Date: Oct 2004
Location: Scotland
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I'm sorry you ended up in A&E Lillie. Did anything useful come of it? How are you now?
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I put it down on paper and then the ghost does not ache so much.
Don't try to calm the storm, calm yourself, the storm will pass.
You didn't come this far just to come this far.
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12-03-2019, 06:50 PM
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#279
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Join Date: Oct 2007
Location: UK
I am currently:
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I got put back together. Went home. Slept for 3 hours and did an 8 hour work day. No point to see psych as they will just tell me I'm fine. I'm exhausted.
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Given enough tea I could rule the world.
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12-03-2019, 06:58 PM
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#280
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Join Date: Sep 2017
Location: London-ish
I am currently:
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Why do they tell you you're fine? =/
Can you get a super early night tonight?
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