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Old 20-02-2021, 07:36 PM   #181
EyelinerAndCigarettes
 
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Sending you so much love. <3







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Old 22-02-2021, 06:38 PM   #182
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This must be so frustrating, no wonder you are getting somewhat impatient.

I hope they can at lease provide you with a more convenient place to live as that would probably make things easier.



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Old 25-02-2021, 01:04 AM   #183
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It'll take time to get the new place. I just have to be patient.
Did the home test for covid cause my sense of smell has gone and my taste is off. Hopefully get the results tomorrow and can have the carers back. They've increased it to 3 times a day because I was living like a true hobo.

The pain is still immense but I'm getting used to it and not screaming as much when I move so, progress I suppose.

I'm walking better, so proud of that will have to record it haha



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Old 25-02-2021, 01:08 AM   #184
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yes!!!!!
I've been waiting for new content on my WhatsApp :P

I obvs hope you don't have Covid & I am very excited you are making progress :)



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Old 26-02-2021, 10:17 AM   #185
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Have you had your test results back yet? I hope everything is ok. Well done with the walking, it really is something to be proud of and I'm glad you recognise that.





I put it down on paper and then the ghost does not ache so much.

Don't try to calm the storm, calm yourself, the storm will pass.

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Old 02-03-2021, 09:58 PM   #186
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I have no bottoms in the flat as my bro kindly washed all clothes, so when I'm decent again I'll send u a vid I've improved so much <3

I'm like 90% had covid but they fucked up my results and a week later I haven't received it but out of quarantine tomorrow regardless of the results.



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Old 02-03-2021, 10:07 PM   #187
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As long as you are getting better and sticking to self isolation etc I guess it isn't that super relevant.
But it sounds annoying to wait for results and not get them.

I am looking forward to seeing your progress :)

How's things going with your mental health?



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Old 07-03-2021, 09:48 PM   #188
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Mental health is shit.very shit.
I'm hopeless and apathetic about life.

I can't believe I did what I did to land Me in this predicament.



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Old 07-03-2021, 10:01 PM   #189
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what happened? <3 *hugs you and comforts you*



just another floating iceberg in this ocean we call life...….


Am I a failure from birth
Is misery what I deserve
Am I just so void of love
That I'm never good, never good enough
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Old 07-03-2021, 11:30 PM   #190
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I am sorry to hear that things are rough.
Are they providing you with any support for that at all?



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Old 10-03-2021, 01:11 AM   #191
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They are present now.
We're thinking rehabilitation centre again, they've found one and they're gonna do an assessment this coming week hopefully. They specialise is MH and physical health. I think it will be good for me Instead of being in the building I jumped off for real



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Old 10-03-2021, 02:28 AM   #192
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I also feel like the level and intensity of support that you need cannot be provided for you outpatient anyway and also not in a non specialized medical setting.
So that sounds like a really good idea.



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Old 10-03-2021, 02:54 AM   #193
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that sounds like it would be really good, especially if they can help with mental health support. that might also give you some time to figure out a new house too.



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Old 13-03-2021, 02:00 AM   #194
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I'm having terrible visions of the incident. I remember everything, absolutely everything and it's burying me. I can talk to my new CPN next week when I have the depot but for now I can sleep because of it. The memories are awful, full on legit traumatising.

It's the cacophony after the silence. This won't make sense with out going into detail but the details along would be triggering and horrific and I wouldn't say exactly what happened on ryl. It's one in the morning and I am scared.



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Old 13-03-2021, 02:28 AM   #195
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I don’t have personal experience of this myself, but I have worked with people who do and I really think people don’t always comprehend that just because a decision was made, doesn’t mean the aftermath wasn’t traumatising. My most severe attempt was no where near as physically damaging as yours but even now the thoughts intrude and can be difficult to deal with- I imagine dealing with physical reminders for you and life changes make it even more difficult. Sadly it’s an area that really needs more consideration and support. Apart from for depot. Are you seeing anyone for other MH support?

Sending lots of thoughts and courage vibes.





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Old 13-03-2021, 02:30 AM   #196
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I’m aware for various reasons medication through 111 isn’t an option right now (as in to get tonight/this morning). But perhaps you could call and ask about a few days of PRN or sleeping tablets and get the carers to collect tomorrow? The added benefit being that waiting for the call may distract, even if very minimally. Just a suggestion, I know this might add to the struggling tonight for some people


Last edited by Pomegranate : 13-03-2021 at 02:30 AM. Reason: Adding something




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Old 14-03-2021, 11:29 PM   #197
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Thanks Emma. I have strong sleeping tablets and painkillers.

I'm scared I'm going to feel like this forever. I really can't cope.



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Old 15-03-2021, 02:14 AM   #198
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I think the possibility is strong that things can change and the way you feel now (both mentally and physically) will not always be the same. But I know that does not make things easier.

I wish I had better words but thinking of you.



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Old 16-03-2021, 01:44 AM   #199
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Thank you. I really hope they'll change. I hope my mobility will become better and I hope my mood won't be so low.

I'm fed up of crying into my pillow so the neighbours won't hear me. Last time they legit banged the wall.

I've asked, pleaded, and begged for help. Maybe one day someone will listen



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Old 17-03-2021, 12:43 PM   #200
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I'm sorry you're not in a good place right now. Try and think of the little and big wins you've had. You are doing well. Your neighbours sound pretty insensitive. What help do you need right now? Are you needing more than what you have?





I put it down on paper and then the ghost does not ache so much.

Don't try to calm the storm, calm yourself, the storm will pass.

You didn't come this far just to come this far.


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