Ever get jealous?

[coldsummer]

I’m in a really good place in my life, I didn’t SI for a year and a half and even then, it was a relapse.
But I found, and I wonder if it’s normal, that I enjoy it when I get cut accidentally and get jealous of other people when they do. My boyfriend cut himself by accident and he needs bandages, and I actually wish it was me. I don’t just miss the SI itself (although mostly) but also looking at it and taking care of it... Like I have this thing to look after and to live around... Ever happened to anyone else?

[Koala hugs]

Your not alone with this I'm the same sometimes the only self care we can manage is too look after our injurys I can totally relate I don't know what the answer is but wanted u to know that it isn't just u

[one_step_closer]

I'm glad you're doing well, you must have worked really hard. Well done. I can relate to being jealous of people with cuts etc but usually that's because I want more damage on my body. Looking at cuts and taking care of them is actually a big part of self harm I think so I can understand why you'd miss that part. Are there other things you can take care of instead? Things about yourself like looking after your skin or even just looking after a plant? I know it's really different but it might help a bit.

[pink elephant]

Sometimes I feel jealous of people who end up with accidental cuts (like you said). It is no so much about the taking care of the wound, but that they can simply take care of it and move on with their life without guilt or shame or anything of those good things. Whenever I get an accidental cut or some other form of accidental injury, the people around me never believe it was an accident and I find myself trying to justify and fight for myself.

Great job! Every day free is an amazing accomplishment and deserves to be celebrated. I hope you have many more good days.