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Old 29-06-2007, 11:12 PM   #1
ghosts in the machine
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Triggering (Sexual Abuse) - hes' here - *updated below*

ohmygdo he's heere can't think he;s gona huurt me again already touching me in the car can't think why wont he leave me alone??


Last edited by ghosts in the machine : 04-07-2007 at 11:33 AM.


For those doubts that swirl all around us
For those lives that tear at the seams
We know… we’re not what we’ve seen

For this dance we’ll move with each other
There ain’t no other step than one foot
Right in front of the other

~ We're marching on... ~


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Old 29-06-2007, 11:15 PM   #2
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*hugs* Am really sorry:(

Can you get away from him some how? Or just scream so he will leave you alone.

xxxx



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-X-


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Old 29-06-2007, 11:20 PM   #3
ghosts in the machine
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stuuck at home now, 11ppm i cant; go anywhere and he's looking at me funy again

hes' sleeping so close to ym rooom



For those doubts that swirl all around us
For those lives that tear at the seams
We know… we’re not what we’ve seen

For this dance we’ll move with each other
There ain’t no other step than one foot
Right in front of the other

~ We're marching on... ~


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Old 29-06-2007, 11:58 PM   #4
abba12
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hun can you sneak out overnight or something? or prehaps pretend a friend called you asking for help and go there, and then tell that friend whats happening and stay with her?
if he does anything scream. youre not alone are you? make sure they hear you. you can do it, you have to, to be safe.

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Old 30-06-2007, 12:09 AM   #5
ghosts in the machine
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i can't leave
psych is "on call" all nigth just in case hee trys something

i haven't made a loud noise in such a long time. I don't think I actually can anymore



For those doubts that swirl all around us
For those lives that tear at the seams
We know… we’re not what we’ve seen

For this dance we’ll move with each other
There ain’t no other step than one foot
Right in front of the other

~ We're marching on... ~


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Old 30-06-2007, 12:19 AM   #6
abba12
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you have to, you can do it. its a natural thing, you just need your mind to let you. and im glad the psych is there. please, try and scream if he does anything, do whatever you can to get away. you dont deserve to be treated like this, stand up for yourself.

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Old 30-06-2007, 12:30 AM   #7
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*hugs*

You can be safe, hun. How are you now?



Thank you for letting me stay here
Thank you for taking me in

-Gratitude, Ani DiFranco

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Old 30-06-2007, 04:51 AM   #8
bloodletting
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you shouldnt be put in a situation where your abuser can still hurt you...sometimes it cant be helped..i still have to see mine at least once a week and it puts me in a bad place everytime...tell someone sweetie, cause if he gets a chance he might just try again, call the police..a friend anyone..just stay safe please
xoxoxox



Do not follow the common path.....go where there is no path and leave a trail.....


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Old 30-06-2007, 03:29 PM   #9
ghosts in the machine
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Sorry about last night, I was a bit scared. Was the first time I'd seen him since 3 1/2 years ago when the original abuse happened.

He didn't do anything too serious. And I blocked my door so he couldn't do any worse.

He's gone for now - was only staying for one night this time. Be back in a couple of weeks I think, for a couple of nights. Then he'll be going back to America so I won't be around him.

Thanks for putting up with me



For those doubts that swirl all around us
For those lives that tear at the seams
We know… we’re not what we’ve seen

For this dance we’ll move with each other
There ain’t no other step than one foot
Right in front of the other

~ We're marching on... ~


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Old 30-06-2007, 05:41 PM   #10
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*Cuddles you*

Don't be sorry, anyone would be scared in that situation. I'm glad you're alright, and he's gone now.

I understand if you can't face telling anyone about what he did. But maybe you could arrange to be out of the house, stay at a friend's house or something the next time he's there. It's an awful situation to be in, and you shouldn't have to.

Take care of yourself, I'm here if you need to talk or anything.

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Old 04-07-2007, 11:30 AM   #11
ghosts in the machine
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OK

so I told my psych about someone trying to get into my room at 03:21 that night

now she says she's got to tell the child protection officer in school

and they're calling my parents

all because I'm seven-****ing-teen, and so still a minor.


I am >-< this close to throttling the CPO who has been guilt tripping me all morning with "Think of the others he might hurt. You wouldn't want that now, would you?"
:banghead:


any ways of getting out of this?


Last edited by ghosts in the machine : 04-07-2007 at 11:45 AM.


For those doubts that swirl all around us
For those lives that tear at the seams
We know… we’re not what we’ve seen

For this dance we’ll move with each other
There ain’t no other step than one foot
Right in front of the other

~ We're marching on... ~


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Old 04-07-2007, 12:21 PM   #12
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*huggles* sorry i dont really have any advice for you hun, but i know how fustrating the "Think of the others he might hurt. You wouldn't want that now, would you?" line is, heard that far too many times. i dont think that there is a way of getting out of your parents being told really, but i guess you could try telling the cpo that telling your parents will make things much worse for you. it can work sometimes guess it depends on what the cpo is like.
hope you find a solution hun
x x x

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Old 04-07-2007, 06:16 PM   #13
ghosts in the machine
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cpo is a bitch and friends with my mum
well, maybe not a bitch, but everything she said this morning was really out of order
I made her promise that she wouldn't call my parents before telling me, which was reasonable enough
so now I just need to keep objecting everytime she tries to convince me it's a good idea

whyyyy do they have to meddle?! Wish I was 18, damn it - I wouldn't have to worry about whether they would report it, and I could get it out of my system and then move on. My parents do not need to know.



For those doubts that swirl all around us
For those lives that tear at the seams
We know… we’re not what we’ve seen

For this dance we’ll move with each other
There ain’t no other step than one foot
Right in front of the other

~ We're marching on... ~


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Old 04-07-2007, 11:04 PM   #14
abba12
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i understand where youre comming from. my best friend was statutory raped, and even though the guy totally used her she did it semi-willingly, and she certainly didnt want her parents finding out, but the psych told them. her mother was abusive and now calls her all sorts of horrible things.

but at the same time, particuarly in your case, if theyre happy to have this person come over they need to be told, it will be a wake up call to them that this person isnt safe, and it should mean you will be safer because he wont be back again. its hard but it will be better in the long run for you. itll work out, and youll be 18 soon enough. i know its a total invasion of privacy when they tell your parents things, but theyre trying to help, they really are, even if it isnt helping at all.



Live to Dream and Dream to Live
A flash in the dark
Of a blade so clean
Memories of remorse
Thoughts left unseen
We can do this in time, we can be free
(Was written in late 2006. Now, finally, early 2008, I really am free, and it feels amazing)


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Old 07-07-2007, 11:32 PM   #15
ghosts in the machine
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so...
school decided NOT to call parents
and he's here again
for three nights
*very nervous*



For those doubts that swirl all around us
For those lives that tear at the seams
We know… we’re not what we’ve seen

For this dance we’ll move with each other
There ain’t no other step than one foot
Right in front of the other

~ We're marching on... ~


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Old 08-07-2007, 12:43 AM   #16
abba12
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you need to tell them... if you cant do that get yourself out of there for a few nights, spend them at a friends place.

please be safe..



Live to Dream and Dream to Live
A flash in the dark
Of a blade so clean
Memories of remorse
Thoughts left unseen
We can do this in time, we can be free
(Was written in late 2006. Now, finally, early 2008, I really am free, and it feels amazing)


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Old 09-07-2007, 01:26 PM   #17
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Be safe honey, please be safe, we love you!!

Try and get out and stay with a friend like Emmy said!

Hope you're okay.

Amy xxxx

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Old 11-07-2007, 12:06 PM   #18
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Even though telling them is terrifying, maybe it would help hun. And it would be a lot better for you in the long run. You have nothing to be ashamed of here, they won't judge you.
You did the right thing to tell someone. Just stay safe, how are you coping now?
x

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Old 11-07-2007, 10:16 PM   #19
ghosts in the machine
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well
they stayed an extra night
he had his fun (like every other night)
I barricaded my door so nothing worse would happen
they've gone now
they're not coming back


I'm not sure how I feel about it
just a bit... numb.. for now



For those doubts that swirl all around us
For those lives that tear at the seams
We know… we’re not what we’ve seen

For this dance we’ll move with each other
There ain’t no other step than one foot
Right in front of the other

~ We're marching on... ~


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Old 12-07-2007, 12:04 AM   #20
bloodletting
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*HUGS* i'm sorry you had to be put back in this situation sweetie, it is certainly not fair on you. how are you supposed to heal if you still have to put up with sh*t from your abuser....
have you thought about maybe letting the psych talk to your parents? he cant continue to harrass you like he does, he still wants to show you that he has the power, and it's not right. do something for you hun, put yourself first for once.
but either way take care and stay safe
here to chat if you need me PM anytime xoxoxox



Do not follow the common path.....go where there is no path and leave a trail.....


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