Live Help


Forum Jump
Post New Thread  Reply
Old 28-07-2021, 09:46 PM   #1
fleur-de-lis
 
fleur-de-lis's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2021
I am currently:
Attachment to scars I want to be rid of

Hello,

I'm new to RYL and to forums in general, but this seems like a good place to ask about something that's been bugging me.

After 7 years of self harm I'm finally coming up on 1 year free of it, and have started thinking about dealing with my scars. I have a couple tattoos already, but it recently came to my attention that people can still recognize the scars underneath from a distance. I've been exploring my options and decided on using bio-oil to try and fade them a bit. The problem I have is that I find I'm afraid of having my scars fade more. I think I genuinely want to get rid of them and have my confidence and life back, but when the time comes to put the bio-oil on I feel this sickening attachment like I have to have scars. They're pretty textured, so I doubt anything short of surgery would remove them completely, but it's still really hard to do anything that I know might help.

Has anyone else experienced something like this and found a way to navigate that kind of feeling? I'd appreciate any advice :) Sorry for the really long post

fleur-de-lis is offline   Reply With Quote
2 Hugs Given By :
Old 29-07-2021, 02:59 AM   #2
Twisted Fate
 
Twisted Fate's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: Michigan
I am currently:

Welcome to RYL and congrats of being one year free!

I've had the same struggles with being split on if I wanted mine to fade or not. I'm not sure if this helps but for me mine took a really long time to fade so that gave me time to adjust to it. Just knowing it's a slow process and not a really quick thing helped me quite a bit. Also knowing that they wouldn't fade completely helped me too. If you're not sure if you're ready to start trying to fade them you could try covering them with make up just to see how you feel with them being more covered. I've heard good quality make up that is designed to cover tattoos can really help cover scars but I haven't actually tried it.



Forget the risk and take the fall if it's what you want it's worth it all


Twisted Fate is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 29-07-2021, 03:28 AM   #3
Auror.
Aurors for the win.
 
Auror.'s Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2007
Location: Godric's Hollow

To add to the above, most of my raised/textured scars took over a decade to go down and fade on their own. Probably not the most helpful, sorry.



Please do not give me virtual hugs unless you are only using the hug function on threads. Thanks.


You can't always keep it separate.
This is happening, this is part of you.


Auror. is online now   Reply With Quote
Old 29-07-2021, 08:36 PM   #4
fleur-de-lis
 
fleur-de-lis's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2021
I am currently:

Thank you for the tips! I'll have to try the makeup. I also appreciate getting an idea for how long it takes. I know everyone heals differently, but having some idea what to expect (and that it won't be a fast, jarring change) is helpful. As much as I sometimes wish they would go away entirely, knowing that that won't happen takes some of the fear out of trying to improve the look of them a bit.

fleur-de-lis is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 06-08-2021, 09:26 PM   #5
Valentina.hurtz
 
Join Date: Aug 2021
I am currently:

Quote:
Originally Posted by fleur-de-lis View Post
Hello,

I'm new to RYL and to forums in general, but this seems like a good place to ask about something that's been bugging me.

After 7 years of self harm I'm finally coming up on 1 year free of it, and have started thinking about dealing with my scars. I have a couple tattoos already, but it recently came to my attention that people can still recognize the scars underneath from a distance. I've been exploring my options and decided on using bio-oil to try and fade them a bit. The problem I have is that I find I'm afraid of having my scars fade more. I think I genuinely want to get rid of them and have my confidence and life back, but when the time comes to put the bio-oil on I feel this sickening attachment like I have to have scars. They're pretty textured, so I doubt anything short of surgery would remove them completely, but it's still really hard to do anything that I know might help.

Has anyone else experienced something like this and found a way to navigate that kind of feeling? I'd appreciate any advice :) Sorry for the really long post
i completely relate to that,, i started cutting at 13 and now it feels like my scars prove that ive survived something if that makes sense. my scars started fading and when i realized it somehow triggered me and i relapsed. my scars are now part of who i am,, in some sick,, horrific way.

Valentina.hurtz is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 08-08-2021, 11:54 PM   #6
pixiedust_11
 
pixiedust_11's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2010
I am currently:

Hey, welcome! I just wanted to add that I can also relate to this hugely and I would suggest it's probably quite normal to feel that way. Your scars are a physical reminder of a difficult time in your life. When I have feelings like this, I tell myself that just as my mind is journeying with my struggles, so is my body. Often we can get stuck in our mind, but if our body is showing signs of moving forward then it demonstrates we have scope for growth and for healing - all the more important when healing feels impossible.

Sorry that this isn't very practical advice, but just wanted to say that I hear you.



Do not be dismayed by the brokenness of the world. All things can be mended. Not with time, as they say, but with intention. So go. Love intentionally, extravagantly, unconditionally. The broken world awaits in darkness for the light that is you.

pixiedust_11 is online now   Reply With Quote
Old 11-08-2021, 01:15 AM   #7
fleur-de-lis
 
fleur-de-lis's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2021
I am currently:

That's a really nice way of looking at it. Thank you, I've never thought about it that way

fleur-de-lis is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply


Currently Active Members Viewing This Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
 
Thread Tools Search this Thread
Search this Thread:

Advanced Search

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

vB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Censor is ON
Forum Jump


Sea Pink Aroma
All times are GMT +1. The time now is 08:21 PM.