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Old 31-01-2020, 04:23 PM   #1721
EyelinerAndCigarettes
 
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How are you doing? How has the last few days been?







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Old 31-01-2020, 07:38 PM   #1722
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I've been a bit better today, been quite productive. Had psychology which was okay but I struggled with at times. Also saw my support worker. Relieved I'm not being moved. Started lithium last night.

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Old 31-01-2020, 09:19 PM   #1723
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Worrying about psychology I don't know if I can do it anymore it's so hard and it's not even got to the hardest part yet

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Old 31-01-2020, 11:24 PM   #1724
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Psychology and EMDR are really stressing me out. Because I know it's only gonna get worse. I'm so lucky to have my psychologist she's so amazing and giving me lots of her time but I just don't think I can do this anymore . I'm weak.

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Old 01-02-2020, 09:09 AM   #1725
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You've done really well to re-start the lithium and seeing your psychologist/support. I know EMDR is difficult to start with but it does get easier even when it feels like it won't.

Do you feel safe enough to speak to your psychologist about how you're feeling too?







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Old 02-02-2020, 03:53 PM   #1726
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Thank you. Well I'm seeing her tomorrow so I'll try to talk about my concerns. I'm dreading it.

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Old 03-02-2020, 10:18 PM   #1727
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I failed at psychology. Even I can do that. What the hell is wrong with me. Since had an incident. I don't know what to do anymore.

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Old 04-02-2020, 08:22 AM   #1728
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I'm sorry you're struggling. What makes you think you failed? Have any of the staff been supportive since your incident?







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Old 04-02-2020, 08:52 AM   #1729
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Because I walked out of psychology half way through and said I couldn't do it anymore. The staff member who found me was really supportive but she's not on shift today and it's mainly crap staff on today. I think I'm just gonna keep attempting til it works. That's how bad I feel atm.

Thanks for your support and replies x

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Old 04-02-2020, 09:18 AM   #1730
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Have you spoken to your psychologist since? I highly doubt she would think you've failed. I think you've just shown her how much you're struggling, rather than that meaning you've failed if that makes sense?

I'm really glad the staff member was supportive, you say there's mostly crap staff on, does that mean there's someone that you would be able to speak to? I think it's really important to let them know how much you're hurting right now.

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Old 04-02-2020, 11:49 AM   #1731
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No I haven't seen her. She's busy for the rest of the week. I have written her a letter though to tell her how much I am struggling and why I couldn't talk to her yesterday. I feel scared and vulnerable.

Thank you. There is one but I don't want to approach them.

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Old 04-02-2020, 04:48 PM   #1732
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Really proud of you for writing the letter, that shows real strength.

x







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Old 04-02-2020, 06:42 PM   #1733
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Thank you. Not sure if it was a good or bad letter.

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Old 04-02-2020, 07:34 PM   #1734
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If you were honest that's all she or anyone can ask for.







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Old 04-02-2020, 11:12 PM   #1735
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I was honest but not sure if it's good honesty. I really hope she reacts okay and doesn't give up on me.

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Old 05-02-2020, 10:35 PM   #1736
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Now on Level 3s. I just want everything to go back to normal. I just wish all this would stop.

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Old 07-02-2020, 07:41 PM   #1737
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Staying on Level 3s til Monday and then they're going to review it. Feels like things can't really get any worse right now.

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Old 08-02-2020, 04:57 PM   #1738
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Sorry, what's level 3? I'm sorry things feel so awful. Is there anything that you think might help?



We’ll find a way to fight it, we always have.
It's not how tragically we suffer but how miraculously we live.


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Old 08-02-2020, 06:12 PM   #1739
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It means I have to be watched and have someone with me at all times. I'm really not sure. Thanks for your kind words x

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Old 09-02-2020, 10:22 PM   #1740
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I'm really anxious about tomorrow. Don't know if they're gonna take me off level 3s or not and I'm not sure what to do about psychology. I also don't know what to do about my hours of care/going back into supported housing. I feel overwhelmed.

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