I feel so lost

Nowheretogo · 18-05-2012, 01:49 AM

I had a really bad day today.. I skipped dinner and now there's one more of those countless marks on my body.. I'm so tired of people dragging me over the edge. I was doing so good. No cutting, no skipped meals, for a week. Then my own teacher triggered me. I know he hates me, but he told me that I'd never amount to anything. Sometimes I question why I'm here. I question why I deserve my life an not someone else. I don't ever thought my life would take this big of a downhill spiral in under a year. I just feel so hopeless. I would really like to talk to someone about it all. PM me..?

PassedExpectations · 18-05-2012, 02:59 AM

i'm not planning on staying online much longer, so can't chat through PM, but i did want to reply.

don't beat yourself up over the self harm. it was a bad decision, but making yourself feel really horrible about it will make you more triggered to harm again. you need to be gentle with yourself.

do you think that you could go get something to eat now?

it is so deflating when teachers (well, anyone really) says that sort of thing to you. but the way to handle it is to prove them wrong, or at least prove them wrong on your own terms (because mounting to something to you may be different than what amounting to something means to the teacher, and that is ok!).

do you have anyone to talk to? like maybe a counselor at school...

Charmed · 18-05-2012, 09:14 PM

How are you doing now?

I completely agree with what Katie has said, Its okay that you have harmed yourself don't think too badly of it, you can start again and you can do it. Is there any way you can talk to this teacher? Maybe about that you're having a little bit of a hard time at the moment and would appreciate if he let go for a bit? Also proving them wrong is a great way to go about it!

I'm available to PM if you'd like :) but I also wanted to reply :) Hope you're okay, stay strong <3

Wonderland. · 20-05-2012, 10:58 PM

Hey,

I think it was completely unhelpful of your teacher to say what he did to you, I'm not surprised you are feeling the way you are. He should be making you feel empowered that you can do anything if you put your mind to it, not being negative and making you feel hopeless about the future and yourself.

Hope you are feeling a bit better (:

Take care.
Amy x