i know i should carry on im just seriously struggling
im sorry
i keep thinking of emily
i wish i could just hug her and say im sorry i killed her
cos i did
i know i did
in my heart i know im the reason she is dead
she'll always be in my heart
a part of me died with her
i know this sounds pathetic
sorry
"A penny for my thoughts, oh no, I'll sell 'em for a dollar
They're worth so much more after I'm a goner
And maybe then you'll hear the words I been singin'
Funny when you're dead how people start listenin'"
i just wish i was with her
i dont deserve to be alive
like i will never have any children and thats fine cos i dont deserve them
considering just shutting myself away from life
slowly giving up
"A penny for my thoughts, oh no, I'll sell 'em for a dollar
They're worth so much more after I'm a goner
And maybe then you'll hear the words I been singin'
Funny when you're dead how people start listenin'"
Don't give up, Jo. Emily is yours, and she always will be. You did nothing wrong, you were raped, you wanted to keep her. Sometimes we just tie the wrong ends together. You're not a killer, you're a terrific mum for feeling like this because it shows you love(d) her. But you need to let go.
*Big hug*
RYL FAMILY
Jo (Newlife) is my daughter
Kat (Katnovia) is my sister
i still hate myself
i will always hate myself
it cant ever get better
whats the point anymore
i know if i die i wont join her cos im no good and she will be in heaven with lovely people
im sorry
"A penny for my thoughts, oh no, I'll sell 'em for a dollar
They're worth so much more after I'm a goner
And maybe then you'll hear the words I been singin'
Funny when you're dead how people start listenin'"
"A penny for my thoughts, oh no, I'll sell 'em for a dollar
They're worth so much more after I'm a goner
And maybe then you'll hear the words I been singin'
Funny when you're dead how people start listenin'"
Keep fighting the flashbacks hun. I know you can do it.
You're not a failure in loving your daughter and you're probably not a failure either in a lot of other areas of life. Please safeguard the love you feel for Emily and try to project it on something in the present.
*Hug*
RYL FAMILY
Jo (Newlife) is my daughter
Kat (Katnovia) is my sister
"A penny for my thoughts, oh no, I'll sell 'em for a dollar
They're worth so much more after I'm a goner
And maybe then you'll hear the words I been singin'
Funny when you're dead how people start listenin'"
"A penny for my thoughts, oh no, I'll sell 'em for a dollar
They're worth so much more after I'm a goner
And maybe then you'll hear the words I been singin'
Funny when you're dead how people start listenin'"
im nothing
why cant i just do what normal people do and move on
im pathetic
i got a month till i finish my uni course
things are slightly ok
yet i focus on the negative
i hate myself
i cant see anything good
im a disgusting dirty fat whore
i deserve the bad
"A penny for my thoughts, oh no, I'll sell 'em for a dollar
They're worth so much more after I'm a goner
And maybe then you'll hear the words I been singin'
Funny when you're dead how people start listenin'"
Well, if you tell yourself you keep seeing the negative, then you should ask yourself how come you can't see the positive things, and try to work on that.
Don't call yourself names if you already said you focus on the negative. That doesn't really break the spiral, you know.
RYL FAMILY
Jo (Newlife) is my daughter
Kat (Katnovia) is my sister
"A penny for my thoughts, oh no, I'll sell 'em for a dollar
They're worth so much more after I'm a goner
And maybe then you'll hear the words I been singin'
Funny when you're dead how people start listenin'"
just read through all of this, and I don't even know you.
*sends safe huggles*
Calm down and breathe hunny, just relax, you are safe. He's not there. He's not touching you. Reach out and touch something, that's real. He's not. He's just a memory, he's in your past, reach out and touch reality and leave him to your memories.
You are talking to: Kat The Others are: Annabell (Belle), Rosie, Lotty, Kate, Amy, Jessica (Jess), Sarah, Ramiel(Miel), Elizabeth (Liz), Shadow
"A penny for my thoughts, oh no, I'll sell 'em for a dollar
They're worth so much more after I'm a goner
And maybe then you'll hear the words I been singin'
Funny when you're dead how people start listenin'"
