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Old 12-09-2012, 01:35 PM   #1
madman
 
Join Date: Sep 2012
People make fun of me and my shyness.

When I was 8 I was a shy kid I didn't speak much. In my school was a lot of brave kids I didn't feel well there. Every break they were loud while I was sitting alone. Teacher told few times that I'm other than them I am shy and quiet (among all). Then everybody started to call my shy… They were making fun of few people but especially of me cause I was shy. When teacher asked who speaks loud, they always focused on me and laughed and everybody knew that wasn’t me but it was funny for them…
I couldn’t make friends because they told: "he is that guy who doesn't speak" they looked at me and laughed hard. There was also one very shy girl in my class and they were often joking that we are couple or asking me how’s your girlfriend? Or when they saw some shy person “hey, he’s like you haha” _._ It was so embarrassing. They laughed at everything I said/I did. I wasn't very shy I rarely did it but everytime I swore, they acted like they are shocked "first time I heard he swore 0.o" They were making me look a lot more shy than I actually was. They are so cruel. Each time I was coming to class they were joking "please, sit with me, you are so strong everyone at school is afraid of you haha." When I was sitting alone they said "look at him, hes so shy, hes sitting alone and doesnt talk at all"... They commented my behaviour all the time. I was always in center of attention and I didn't want to. I hated it.

I tried to hide from them. Ive never had an account on myspace/facebook. Bullies wanted to create my account and make fun of me few peoplpe told them to not do it cause its too much. Finally year ago I created account there because my family told me about it for a long time but I hided my friends. It was HUGE step in social relations. I was always afraid of people. My friends asked "whats happened? you are on facebook wow!"
Yesterday I met one girl who was my classmate in bus. I wanted to talk. I said to her "Hi!" to times and she didnt even look at me. I poked her and she finally noticed me said "hi" and went away... So rude... Now Im 18 Im just normal quiet guy, definitely not shy but they still make fun of me. Recently Im thinking about my whole life. It sucks. I dont have good memories.
I thought about suicide. I cant study I cant eat. I dont enjoy anything. I dont do anything. Just playing computer games/listening to music. Few people destroyed my life. I cant live this way no more. My patience is over. I lost my ambition. I dont think its ever gonna change. I dont even think about having a girlfriend. I dont see the future.
Everyone remembers how I was bullied at school. I want to cry all time. How to change my reputation? Once some person said that he knows a girl who was also called shy and made fun of. He told me that she still has the same reputation even if she changed a little bit. Do I really have to be treated like a freak? My family doesn't know about my problems. I lost hope to have normal life. Now I live only for my family. When I see my sister's smile everything seems better. I dont wanna leave my family. And I dont think it sounds as bad as it really is. I wanna give up.

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Old 12-09-2012, 08:51 PM   #2
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Don't let them win, don't let destroy who you are and who you want to be. Kids can be very cruel if there is something a little bit different to you but as people grow up I find that peoples differences are embraced.

Take care.
Amy x



'Cause I'll always remember you the same.
Oh eyes like wild flowers within demons of change ♥


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Old 13-09-2012, 03:54 PM   #3
madman
 
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When I was 8-16 few boys were laughing at me cause I was quiet and not talkative. They told it to girls and then girls looked at me like Im a freak. These girls know me as a shy guy who doesnt talk at all till now because of them... ;( ;(
They were making fun of me whenever they could. In locker room few boys were making fun of others especially at me cause I was quiet. "Look at him, he doesn't talk at all, he is funny haha, hes shy, say "f***" don’t be shy" Everybody was laughing hard at me. Each time I was coming to class they were joking "please, sit with me, you are so strong everyone at school is afraid of you haha." When I was sitting alone they told "look at him, hes so shy, hes sitting alone and doesnt talk at all"... They commented my behaviour all the time. I was always in center of attention and I didn't want to. I hated it.

There was also one very shy girl in my class and they were often joking that we are couple or asking me how’s your girlfriend? Or when they saw some shy person “hey, he’s like you haha” _._ It was so embarrassing. They laughed at everything I said/I did. I wasn't very shy, I rarely did it but sometimes when I swore, they acted like they are shocked "first time I heard he swore 0.o" They were making me look a lot more shy than I actually was. The worst thing is that NEVER hit me. They just always make so much fun of me. The more people were with us the more they were making fun of me.
I couldn’t make friends because they told: "he is that guy who doesn't speak" they looked at me and laughed hard. Whatever I do they always make fun of me. They humiliate me this way socially.
Now Im 18 I go to school far away from there. This school is fine but I dont want to make friends because of them. Im afraid of people from previous school. What if they told how they make fun of me or something like that. Im so afraid ot it. My whole life people always focused on me and made fun of me. You dont know how much it hurts. Everyone remembers that shy guy who was humiliated for whole primary school ;( I want to cry... Everyone of them could easily destroy me. I was hiding from them as much as I could. If they had to focus on one person they would ALWAYS focus on me and laugh ;( Imagine: Everytime I go to school or we were sitting during the break among a lot of people 2 guys start to focus on me and tell humiliating things and make fun of me FOR MANY YEARS. I couldnt do anything against group of bullies. My family doesn't know about problems. Thats why I dont go out often, just to school, shop.
Thats why I was so afraid of facebook. I feel like the whole city laughs or feels bad for me. Now Im on facebook but I just hided friends. I have social anxiety because of them. I feel safe only at home. I dont see the future. I dont like watching TV and see how well people live. They dont think making fun of me is bad :( they tell something funny about me and laugh. It hurts me and more. I even thought about suicide but I love my family.
WHAT SHOULD I DO?! pls answer! or at least other forum or website where I could get help... Last time I felt happy 5 years ago or even more. Now everyday Im depressed ;(


Last edited by madman : 13-09-2012 at 04:01 PM. Reason: correct
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Old 13-09-2012, 09:01 PM   #4
talaiporia
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Being painfully shy can really be a curse, but it can be 'broken' so to speak. I barely spoke all through first school (I had a twin) and gradually spoke a little more each year til I started uni, but I was always painfully shy even then. It was only when I joined this uni, joined lots of clubs and made friends that I really started to get confidence.

I know you'll have heard it before, but join clubs, hobbies. It really does help; you're not going to make friends alone in your room, and even if you're painfully shy and you go and sit alone, you'll still have someone who will reach out to you, and you'll grow.

I am sorry to hear about everything that has happened to you, but it's not too late to turn things around.

Have you ever spoken to anyone about how you're feeling?



It doesn't matter where you come from; it matters where you go.
No-one gets remembered for the things they didn't do.
We won't all be here this time next year,
so while you can take a picture of us.
We're definitely going to hell,
but we'll have all the best stories to tell.


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Old 14-09-2012, 07:11 PM   #5
madman
 
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I need a free psychologist online, I think he will be the best, any websites?

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Old 14-09-2012, 10:03 PM   #6
Wonderland.
 
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I'm sorry I don't the answer to your question. But I'm curious as to your reasons for wanting to speak to a psychiatrist online, why not speak to a psychiatrist face to face?

By the way I don't want you to think I'm not having go at you, I'm just curious as to your reasons behind it.

Amy x



'Cause I'll always remember you the same.
Oh eyes like wild flowers within demons of change ♥


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Old 16-09-2012, 01:57 PM   #7
madman
 
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UPDATE When I was 8 I was a shy kid I didn't speak much. Every break they were loud while I was sitting alone. Teacher told few times that I'm other than them I am shy and quiet (among all). Then everybody started to call my shy… They were making fun of few people but especially of me cause I was shy. When teacher asked who speaks loud, they ALWAYS focused on me and laughed and everybody knew that wasn’t me but it was funny for them… When we were sitting in locker room or anywhere few guys always focused on me and told “look at him, he doesn’t talk at all” and everyone laughed or “don’t be shy, say “f***”.
When we were with older “cool” guys few of my classmates pointed at me and said “you know that he doesn’t say one word during whole day? Haha” (ofc i did but less than others or “[my name] hey, can you tell us a joke or say something funny? Im just joking I forgot that he can’t talk, haha” Then older guys treated me like a freak and during the break came to me and said embarrassing question “you really never say anything?” whole school laughed at me ;(
Soon Ill be 18 I go to nice school. Now I changed Im definitely shy, just normal guy. The problem is they didn’t change themselves. I don’t want to talk to new friends from this school and go to cinema for example cause Im afraid if I met few “bullies” they would destroy everything and tell stupid things to make fun of me. My family doesn’t know about school problems. Im sad I dont have good memories like my parents. Recently I am thinking whole days thinking about my life, I don't want to do anything. Im depressed I can't study I don't eat I don't enjoy anything. I just wanna cry. I have no hope I don't think its gonna change. Im in the similar point as I was 9 years ago. I lost ambition. All I do is going to school then come to home, thinking about my life, listening to the music and playing computer games. The reason why I don’t wanna commit suicide is my family, my parents, sister. I live for them…
It hurts me the most L that Ive had a reputation of shy, not talkative guy, who everyone laughs at whatever I do/I say so I tried to avoid them to avoid jokes about me. Even teachers remember me this way. They pretended to be shocked when I asked a question during the lesson or I was late to school. “Wow first time I hear he said something 0.o” or “You are late? Wow shouldn’t be late, you are too polite” and everybody laughed as usually _._ I couldn’t make friends because they told: "he is that guy who doesn't speak" they looked at me and laughed hard. There was also one very shy girl in my class and they were often joking that we are couple or asking me how’s your girlfriend? Or when they saw some shy person “hey, he’s like you haha” It was so embarrassing. It hurts me that half of them talk about me whenever they see me and treat like a freak because of few people. I don’t go out.
That’s why I’ve never had myspace/facebook because few guys everytime they see me they laugh at me and tell things like that. I am ALWAYS ridiculed in public. That’s why I have social anxiety. Now I just go to school where nobody knew me before where I don’t have to listen embarrassing things about me, go home and enjoy that at least nobody here laughs at me _._
What am I afraid? Some people know me as a freak who doesn’t talk at all, some as a poor, bullied guy and some make fun of me. Few of them ALWAYS FOCUS ON ME, tell how quiet, not talkative Im and start to humiliate me among all and laugh.
Recently I thought that I must stop it and have normal life. Avoiding them will never solve it. If I wont do anything now they will treat this way even if I will be 30 or older, even whole life…
Recently I finally created account on facebook and invited 70 people (it was the hardest thing I’ve ever done, Im serious) but I just hided list of new friends from them. I was thinking about creating this account for few days. When first person accepted I was waiting:will they make fun of me or not? Fortunately they just wrote on my wall “wow I cant believe, whats happened”and it was over. There are few photos on facebook with me and comments “hes the best as usually hehe” but nothing else. Question: What else should I do? 1.Should I invite my family on facebook? Im so afraid of some people because for 9 years they were making fun of me. 2.Should I invite few people from previous school on my 18th birthday party Im a little bit afraid of them? What else should I do?

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Old 16-09-2012, 02:42 PM   #8
Alati-Moelda
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I know exactly what you're going through...before I transferred to a different school I was practically tortured like you were during school. They'd always call me shy and awkward and weird and it hurt so. Freaking. Much. They'd laugh at me when I talked and laugh at me when I didn't!! So confusing! I'm sort of better now that I'm 16 and at a new school, but I mostly don't go out and just go home like you do. Although this year I have to go to games to work at the concession stand so I've been kind of forced to be out there and talk to strangers and what not.

I'm proud of you for joining Facebook an inviting people. 70 is quite the number! To answer your question, I think you should start with inviting family on Facebook and see how you feel after. If you're comfortable with some people from your school then invite away! If not, no worries :) they weren't exactly the nicest to you so I wouldn't blame you if you didn't want to communicate with them. What about the girl at your school who was shy like you? Have you tried communicating with her and seeing how her days went? I bet you two could share stories and get through your anxieties together.

I hope all is well and I'm here if you need to talk on PM! :)



"Whether you think you can or can't, you're right" - Henry Ford

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Old 16-09-2012, 11:54 PM   #9
madman
 
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Thanks for answer :)! Ive just invited my family. I hope everything is gonna be fine.
When I was 8 I was strange, not talkative maybe funny kid and they were making so much fun of me. One guy says "Look he doesn't talk at all" and everyone among laughs. I don't think its funny. They had many reasons to laugh at me. Anyway it hurt me. But we were getting older I was normal, quiet guy and the same people still were laughing hard at me. They just looked at me and laugh. Sometimes feel like there is really something wrong with me. I was trying to avoid them outside of school as much as I could.
For example imagine daily situation in locker room: There was my class and other. There was silence. Nobody had nothing to say. This awkward moment when few guys from my class (for no reason) pick on me and start to say among all "hey [my name] how are you"? I said Im fine. "Do you know any good jokes?" and they smile. I said "unfortunately not". They said "hey, was it this joke? It was pretty funny :D haha, got it" and everybody in locker room laughed at me. I felt ashamed and embarrassed. They laughed at everything I did. Always, ALWAYS. It was everyday but often they were humiliating me in more cruel way... Then more people treated me like a freak. They were making me look more quiet and outcast than I actually was.
So faceboook was the scariest thing I could have. I imagined if I were on facebook they would laugh at me among tens of thousands people or even more. Some day I cried at home and said to myself "Enough". I thought that I have nothing to lose. I cant stand that outside of my home they still tell embarrassing things about me. I want to start new life.They were shocked that I am on facebook. Its not as bad as I thought.
I want to get 2 things:
1.stop calling me shy/quiet/a guy who doesn't talk at all and making fun of it.
2.generally stop talking about me, abusing me and laughing at everthing I do.
What about my 18th birthday? Should I invite some people from my previous school school and second one? I am a little bit afraid of some people. Maybe only from new school?

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Old 19-09-2012, 06:50 PM   #10
madman
 
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Pls answer or if you cant do you know any similar websites?

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Old 19-09-2012, 11:22 PM   #11
Wonderland.
 
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I think yuo should invite whiever your friends with or want become friemds with.



'Cause I'll always remember you the same.
Oh eyes like wild flowers within demons of change ♥


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Old 20-09-2012, 07:50 AM   #12
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I happy of the fact that you are now deciding to design a good life you. You cannot change your past experience, but you can make a good impression of your present life today. It is a good idea that you will invite your former classmates before so that they will see a new you and how you have changed today. It is a better step to make, in order for their bad impressions towards your before be changed into good. By inviting, you can show to them that you are not the shy person and being bullied before. Do not afraid to show to them your changes. Who knows, by inviting them you can create a good friendship with them.

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Old 26-09-2012, 07:11 PM   #13
madman
 
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I found its probably called personality disorder. I know the reason. Few guys who live close to me were making fun of few people, especially at me cause I was the most quiet.
It depends on the situation and people but sometimes I feel confident, arrogant and very talkative, sometimes I want to hide from people as much as I can.
I dont know is it true or not but I imagine the situation and think if they had to talk about only ONE guy or make fun of somebody they would ALWAYS focus on me. For many many years people were making of me
Thats why I cant make new friends. Because of them I have a reputation of so quiet, not talkative guy. Everyone remembers how classmates treated me during camps for example.
I am afraid of going out with new friends because I am afraid I will meet someone from my last school and they will start to laugh at me or something.

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Old 28-09-2012, 03:50 PM   #14
madman
 
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So... There are few reasons why I am so afraid of people. Lets start:
Firstly I have always been very introverted and my class was very extroverted. It started that in group of some people usually I was just sitting and didnt say a word. In the beginning they told why you dont talk at all? I answered "I dont know" and smiled. I was always normal kid just pretty quiet. I was good at sports. Others liked me. I wasnt talking much during the lessons or asking questions and because of it my classmates started to tell teachers that I am just very shy, quiet and usually I dont talk at all. So embarassing... They were making fun of few people but especially of me cause I was shy. When teacher asked who speaks loud, they ALWAYS focused on me and laughed and everybody knew that wasn’t me but it was funny for them… When we were sitting in locker room or anywhere few guys always focused on me and told “look at him, he doesn’t talk at all” and everyone laughed or “don’t be shy, say “f***”.
When we were with older “cool” guys few of my classmates pointed at me and said “you know that he doesn’t say one word during whole day? Haha” (ofc i did but less than others or “[my name] hey, can you tell us a joke or say something funny? Im just joking I forgot that he can’t talk, haha” Then older guys treated me like a freak and during the break came to me and said embarrassing question “you really never say anything?” whole school laughed at me ;(
In my previous school Ive had a reputation of the most polite guy in the class/maybe school... For example if sometimes I couldnt stand it and I punched somebody or swore cause they were making fun of me they pretended to be schocked: "Wow 0.0 first time I heard he swore, I cant believe it. It was out of habit. They dont understand that I am normal guy like them. Nothing changed for 9 years. I still have the same reputation even if I changed a little bit myself they remember everything. They like to make fun of me in front of public. I see on facebook that make new friends. I dont.
They often comment photos on facebook with me "hes the best hehehe" or "look at him haha"
Everyone was laughing at me and my behaviour.

1.So there are few people who make fun of everyone, they think they are cool, better than others. There is smaller group of victim (including me). We are not pussies but nobody can do anything against group of respected people I think everybody is scared of them. Girls like them...
2.Even in group of "victims" I dont feel safe cause even they sometimes joke "you are too polite, you cant drink beer 0.o","you can talk 0.o". I feel so weak around anybody from previous school.
3.Because of some people, one stupid blonde girl told few older girls that I dont talk at all. These girls look at me like Im a freak since then.

Im 18 Im normal guy, the truth is that when I was 8 sometimes I was really just sitting and listening to others for an hour without even saying word. I changed myself but I still have the same reputation of polite, not talkative guy. Everyone remembers me as quiet, poor guy. Sad. I dont think its gonna change ;( I am still afraid of the same people since 9 years... I rarely go out. Just go to new school or shop. I dont wanna go out with my new classmates cause Im afraid of "bullies", generally I go anywhere alone but then they think I am weak and have no friends... I feel safe only when I go out with my family. Thats why Ive been always afraid of facebook. I feel like everyone laughs at me or if they had to focus on just one person they would always focus on me. I need a psychologist... Pls anwer. Facebook was first step to solve problems. Im gonna do everything to have better life.


Last edited by madman : 28-09-2012 at 05:10 PM.
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Old 28-09-2012, 11:49 PM   #15
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I know its hard to understand but I was going to school where everyone knew each other. We all were spending time together. There was group of people who were making fun of everyone else. They wanted to be cool. As I said Ive had a reputation the most polite, quiet, not talkative guy. For example i remember how we all were sitting (my class and other) in locker room. One guy was laughing at few people but especially at me, always focused on me and told "can you talk ;), look at him he usually doesnt say anything haha, hes funny" everybody was laughing hard at me, I wanted to leave and cry... (why I was so polite kid and tried to laugh with them but inside it hurt me so much) or there was also very shy, unattractive, strange girl. He was asking among all "how's your girlfriend?" "What are you talking about with her" "Of course it was funny for everybody... I felt so isolated. Then nobody respected me. I feel so weak and I feel like if they wanted to they could destroy me mentally so easily.

I go to other school where I didnt know anybody before. Here is fine but Im afraid of going out/coming to party with them. I dont wanna let them know that there are few people who like to humiliate me in front of public. Im introverted but it makes me more and more isolated from people. I have never had a girlfriend. I feel like in these situations in locker room where they were making fun of me. Nobody was as humiliated as me. He was making fun of me among whole school. Some people laugh at everything I do for no reason like this guy or start to say that I am freak who doesn't talk at all whenever they see me because of few people... I dont think its ever gonna stop ;( Thats why Ive thought about suicide, thats why Im afraid of people/facebook. I remember how everyone was talking and laughing at me. It destroyed my life. I just go out only to shop. I trust only people from my family. Maybe I should tell my parents about it? Id like to make friends/talk to people but because of my expierences in the past I prefer to not talk at all and hide from people. My whole life he same people laugh at me since schoolhood :(
1.If somebody told me that he heard something embarassing about me or that I dont talk at all how should I answer? for example "what the hell are you talking about, you its funny?"
2.If that guy who always laughs at me will start again to make fun of me in group, how should I answer? Pls help


Last edited by madman : 29-09-2012 at 09:51 AM.
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