Triggering (SI/ED) - *TRIGGER* i'm f^ck^ng up royally....

littlebylittle_daybyday · 09-01-2009, 11:37 PM

idk what to do anymore. I overdosed the other night, and my friend made me make myself throw up.
EVer since then i've been wanting to si so much more... and i did last night. after a month of being free....
and also, since that night.... i haven't been able to eat anythign without thinking of throwign it up. I've made myself vomit after every meal since x...
I'm starving but i can't stand the thought of food being in my stomach.... i'v gaining wait rapidly from my medications for birthcontrol and everybody else is just saying i'm not... but I feel like i am and i don't want to get fatter.....

i don't know what i should do.

momo432 · 10-01-2009, 12:44 AM

*hugs*

1 month is great!!!! even though you've slipped up, just think, if you can last for a month, next time you might be able to last even longer!!
did you go to the doctors and get checked out after your od?

sorry i don't know what to say for the ed parts.

stay safe, pm me if you wanna talk =]

xx

Popple · 10-01-2009, 04:20 PM

*cuddles*
Well done sweetie
You made it a month you should be proud but I know its hard.
And yes you slipped up but thats a part of recovery.
If you haven't been checked by a doctor since the od you need to because any od is dangerous and the effect can be hidden. So you really need to see your doctor and get checked.
I really think you need to try get some help if you are purging and restricting so much because its really dangerous.
I don't have much adice but take care of yourself sweetie
xx

GrimmFaerieTale · 10-01-2009, 04:35 PM

As others have said, a slip up is part of recovery, it doesn't mean that you've failed - you've shown you can go for a month already!
Is it the pill you're on for your birth control? I'm not a FAA so I'm only guessing here but if you're purging and taking oral medication, I'm guessing you're risking losing the medication when you throw up so you might want to consider that.
Sweety, it's also really really important you get your OD checked out, as Miss Pixie said any OD can be dangerous. I hope you're okay xxx

littlebylittle_daybyday · 19-01-2009, 05:09 AM

i would go get it checked out but my mom has to be in the room with me and if she knew i was od-ing, she'd send me away