Getting to know me.
Hi, my name is Hannah Christian, I am currently on this website, because I am trying to quit cutting. I started cutting when I was 13 and i have been in many hospitals, and placements to help me, but it never seemed to help! I have gone a whole year without cutting before I relapsed again, then I went four months and I relapsed again, I am 5 days clean right now, but sometimes I wonder if when i didn't cut I did it for the wrong reasons. I always promise people I will stop, but I always become their disappointment, and I hate, hating myself, I want to love myself, and I want to do this for me and no one else. I want to make my life as enjoyable as possible, because like is short. I just feel like my life is wasting away, and I feel like no one understands me. Please help me understand what I can't! I am at a group home in Huntington, WV, and they don't understand how to take in my feelings, I want to scream, but I stay quiet, I want to cry, but my eyes stay dry.How do I get people to understand, when I can't understand myself! I was raped by my biological dad while my mom videoed me, and sold for drugs by my biological parents. I was put into foster care at age 5 and i got adopted at age 7, it took 27 different homes. I was so grateful when they adopted me, but now i just feel like I've let so many people down. Please just give me some Ideas that you think can help, I need all I can get!