Too much support. seems an uncommon problem.

[Ballerina123]

Update:
Called my cc this morning to see what is going on and they are currently organising a MHA. When ask why she said because I appear though disordered and my speech sometime makes no sense and as a result they think i need meds for disorganised speech. I said I didn't want meds and they said that's why they are doing a MHA so they can force meds.

Anyway I said I will try the meds if it keeps me out of hospital. They said that if they keep me out of hospital I will need to see the htt twice a day and have supervised meds. Which doesn't fill me with joy but if i stay off section then I guess it's ok.
Htt are coming round in 10 mins with the psych to assess me (again).
I'm just gonna agree to it all because it's not worth the argument anymore. And the last this i want is forced meds/section.

Also my cat is ill which is just adding to the stress because I'm really worried about her. Another reason why I need to stay out of hospital.

[in_BPD_hell]

I am so glad you understand where it is at now. that's good to hear
good luck with the MHA and I hope you manage to cooperate with HTT
keep us updated

[tamobhuuta]

how did you get on with the HTT today?

[tiptoes]

I'm sorry that you are having to back on medication. I know you were hoping to manage med free. Try not to be disappointed you have given it everything you can and accepting medication now, however begrudgingly, doesn't mean that there won't be an option to try again without medication in the future.

Hope you are ok and that you cat is feeling better.

[Ballerina123]

Thanks for the support guys.

The MHA was ok. I'm not really sure what it's called but im on a kind of "semi" section. Basically htt will give me my meds daily and if I refuse them at any point all the paper work is in to put me on a section 3 in hospital and force meds.
So I'm kind of being forced them now because I had no choice to say no.
I think they are wrong to put me on meds and they will ruin everything.
Anyway it's just the situation for now and ill just have to play their game for a while.

my cat is ok though. She is ill but the vet gave her lots of medication and although it cost me a fortune he said she will be fine which helps my anxiety and stress level.

[in_BPD_hell]

A community treatment order?
Hope if helps!
Sorry it's not what you wanted but at least your at home not in hospital

[Arienette]

I'm glad your cat is ok. I hope that you're ok and manage to stay home like you want to.

xx

[Ballerina123]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Auror.

Just wondering when you said you have insight, if you notice any of these things in yourself?

If so and you notice them happening, do you see them as issues?

If not, and other people are saying they notice them, I would honestly question why it is you do not notice them, and question your insight.

i don't see those things in myself. But my doc and cc have been saying regularly "what do you mean?" As if they don't alway understand, which is frustrating but I guess I can see to them why this is the case.

I'm not sure about insight. I feel I have it but it's is obviously being questioned so I'm not sure where I stand.

In terms of weather I see it it as an issue: not really i think i function fine.

[Ballerina123]

Auror - not being able to go out because of auditory hallucinations is not normal for me no. So i guess that has changed but it's not bothering me too much because I don't mind being at home. But yes I would probably see this as an issue in a friend so I can see your point.
I don't recognise the speech problem so it's hard to make a judgement on that. I do often feel people are just not listening right.


Anyway I'm trying to stay positive.
Although the meds have not changed my thinking they have made me feel more relaxed which I guess is good. It's only been 3 days though so I'm sort of just waiting to see if anything else changes.
Another positive is that I've not really noticed any side effects except a bit of a hung over feeling when I wake up in the morning.

I'm worried about the thoughts going completely though because I quite like some of them (hense why i didnt want meds); They are like my company when I'm home alone.

Anyway I'll see how it goes.
I'm complying now so hopefully soon all of this will be over.

[Ballerina123]

Also i did go out today to buy a new diary so I guess the team will see that as a positive. I didn't particularly enjoy it but I did it anyway.

[in_BPD_hell]

Very positive! Xx

[tamobhuuta]

I think it's good you went out. how are you feeling now?