RYL Forums


Forum Jump
Post New Thread  Reply
Old 08-01-2018, 07:26 PM   #61
Aubergine
You've got this.
 
Aubergine's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2007
I am currently:

Hey Beckie. Well done for managing college; I know you were anxious about it. You did really well.


I really think it would be good to talk to your tutor about how difficult you're finding your research project. She 100% will not think that you are stupid. Because you definitely are not! It's natural to struggle with things sometimes; it happens to everyone, especially if they haven't studied for a long time. Could you email her? Would that be easier?


You're not a psycho, and the panel won't think that you're one. It's OK to explain that you were unwell at the time, it took a long while to find support/medication that would help, and that you worked really hard and are better now. You've not had any incidents since, and you can get a reference from both your CPN and your psychiatrist to explain how well you've been doing/how there's an insignificant chance of anything happening again. You know yourself better now and would stop it getting out of control like that again, with the help of your team and the other people you've got around you.



“Our defeats are softened and our victories are sweetened because we did it together.” - Toby Ziegler.

This isn't everything you are.


Aubergine is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 08-01-2018, 07:42 PM   #62
Cacoethes
90's B*tch
 
Cacoethes's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2008
Location: Hyrule
I am currently:

Thank you Aubergine

I'll try and talk to her tomorrow if she's about.
I could send an email, but I don't like writing emails because i always think that I write them wrong and the recipients will think I'm stupid (definitely a pattern here, same with submitting assignments)

That's a good point.
I hope I don't forget anything when I have the interview.
I keep thinking about what I'll say but I don't even know what they're going to ask



I'm fine! Totally fine. I don't know why it's coming out all loud and squeaky, 'cause really, I'm fine!


Who else is fine?!?!?


Cacoethes is online now   Reply With Quote
Old 08-01-2018, 07:52 PM   #63
Aubergine
You've got this.
 
Aubergine's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2007
I am currently:

What makes you worry so much about appearing stupid? "Stupid" is a pretty harsh term. It's OK to get things wrong or to make mistakes; you're human and it's part of the human condition to make errors here and there.


Could you write a few things down? I think it would be worth considering what you'd say if they asked you about potential future offences and all of the things that you've got in place that mean it wouldn't happen again. These things tend to be concerned with whether you're likely to "offend" (I put this in marks because I don't think you really knew what you were doing at the time, so am still rather surprised they convicted you) again or not.



“Our defeats are softened and our victories are sweetened because we did it together.” - Toby Ziegler.

This isn't everything you are.


Aubergine is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 08-01-2018, 08:07 PM   #64
Cacoethes
90's B*tch
 
Cacoethes's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2008
Location: Hyrule
I am currently:

I'm really not sure.
I've always been worried about people laughing at me like the tutors laughing together in the staff room about whatever assignment and how ridiculous it was and why am I even in education.
Paranoia I suppose

Writing things down is a good idea.
I really hope they will be understanding.
I would never do those things that I did when I'm well. No way. Im hoping I can get that across to them



I'm fine! Totally fine. I don't know why it's coming out all loud and squeaky, 'cause really, I'm fine!


Who else is fine?!?!?


Cacoethes is online now   Reply With Quote
Old 11-01-2018, 08:17 PM   #65
Aubergine
You've got this.
 
Aubergine's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2007
I am currently:

Hey Beckie.


I read your RV. I'm so sorry that it wasn't the outcome you wanted. How are you doing?



“Our defeats are softened and our victories are sweetened because we did it together.” - Toby Ziegler.

This isn't everything you are.


Aubergine is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 11-01-2018, 08:29 PM   #66
Cacoethes
90's B*tch
 
Cacoethes's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2008
Location: Hyrule
I am currently:

Thank you Aubergine

Im still very upset and disappointed which is ridiculous becauee I knew it was going to happen
And getting rather intense self harm urges which I'm assuming is because of today which is even more ridiculous.
I'm going to have to get over it though because it is what it is!



I'm fine! Totally fine. I don't know why it's coming out all loud and squeaky, 'cause really, I'm fine!


Who else is fine?!?!?


Cacoethes is online now   Reply With Quote
Old 11-01-2018, 08:36 PM   #67
Aubergine
You've got this.
 
Aubergine's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2007
I am currently:

I don't think that it's ridiculous. I think it's understandable that you feel that way. It's a thing you want a lot, so a refusal (for the moment) is bound to hit you hard.


Self-harm urges are difficult. I'm sorry you're struggling with them; it does sound like it could be because of today. Is there anyone you can talk to about what's happened with the DBS panel? It's a lot to keep to yourself.



“Our defeats are softened and our victories are sweetened because we did it together.” - Toby Ziegler.

This isn't everything you are.


Aubergine is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 11-01-2018, 09:11 PM   #68
Buttons.
Never knowing...a helping hand or hell to pay?
 
Buttons.'s Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: UK
I am currently:

*hugs*



'Never forget what you are. The rest of the world will not. Wear it like armor, and it can never be used to hurt you.'

['There is only one thing we say to death. Not today'.']

'We are each our own devil, and we make this world our hell.’ – Oscar Wilde
‘It’s hard to dance with the devil on your back.’ Sydney Carter


Buttons. is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 11-01-2018, 09:45 PM   #69
Cacoethes
90's B*tch
 
Cacoethes's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2008
Location: Hyrule
I am currently:

Thank you both x

Ive got friends and people here to talk to.
I could tell my CC but she's leaving soon anyway.
My mum knows about my criminal record but I don't like to talk about this stuff with her.

I went to fit beatz and it was great but there happened to be 2 new songs which happened to be 2 songs that take me back to very bad times.
It was hard.

I sound so stupid. Like some people have actual real problems that aren't a bad interview or a bloody song!!



I'm fine! Totally fine. I don't know why it's coming out all loud and squeaky, 'cause really, I'm fine!


Who else is fine?!?!?


Cacoethes is online now   Reply With Quote
Old 11-01-2018, 10:11 PM   #70
Aubergine
You've got this.
 
Aubergine's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2007
I am currently:

You always have us here to talk to. :) I'm glad you've got friends elsewhere too. I can understand you not wanting to talk to your Mum about this stuff, though I'm sure she wouldn't mind if you did. It might be worth talking to your CPN, just to have someone to offload to face-to-face, you know? Though it's not the same, I've been turned down for something because of occupational health before - it's horrible and I wish I could give you a hug.


Songs can be so very emotive. I'm not surprised you found it hard if the songs remind you of bad times. I have similar things with certain songs and it's really hard. Be gentle with yourself.


You definitely don't sound stupid. It's OK to be upset.



“Our defeats are softened and our victories are sweetened because we did it together.” - Toby Ziegler.

This isn't everything you are.


Aubergine is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 11-01-2018, 10:23 PM   #71
Bellatrix
Voldemort's Bitch
 
Bellatrix's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2008
Location: Everywhere
I am currently:

Random question, but have you tried appealing to get it removed from your record. Get it sealed?

Just because it wasn't assault, it was an illness that caused it. They should never have pressed charges.




Imperfection is underrated.



Bellatrix is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 11-01-2018, 10:26 PM   #72
Cacoethes
90's B*tch
 
Cacoethes's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2008
Location: Hyrule
I am currently:

Thank you so much Aubergine
I'm pretty sure I told my CC i was having the meeting so she'll probably ask about it and I'll tell her.
My mum wouldn't mind at all.
I just don't like to remind her that I'm a f*ck up.

I didn't know you could appeal against that sort of thing.
Thank you J, I'll look into that.



I'm fine! Totally fine. I don't know why it's coming out all loud and squeaky, 'cause really, I'm fine!


Who else is fine?!?!?


Cacoethes is online now   Reply With Quote
Old 11-01-2018, 10:33 PM   #73
Aubergine
You've got this.
 
Aubergine's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2007
I am currently:

You're very welcome. :)


I hope you're able to talk to your CC about it. Hopefully she'll remember to ask you how it went and give you the opportunity to have a conversation about it.


You are not a fuck up. You were poorly. Just like J said, they should never have pressed charges.



“Our defeats are softened and our victories are sweetened because we did it together.” - Toby Ziegler.

This isn't everything you are.


Aubergine is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 11-01-2018, 10:43 PM   #74
Cacoethes
90's B*tch
 
Cacoethes's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2008
Location: Hyrule
I am currently:

I've got a CPA review with a psych soon so it'll probably come up there too.

Thank you

I've decided to try and have a bit of a self care day tomorrow.
I cleaned today so at least that's done and college work can wait another day.



I'm fine! Totally fine. I don't know why it's coming out all loud and squeaky, 'cause really, I'm fine!


Who else is fine?!?!?


Cacoethes is online now   Reply With Quote
Old 11-01-2018, 10:51 PM   #75
Aubergine
You've got this.
 
Aubergine's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2007
I am currently:

I expect so. Remember that you don't have to talk about it if you don't want to, but it could be a good opportunity to get the psychiatrist's take on things - they may have some good ideas for the next one.


I think a self-care day tomorrow sounds great. You'll be able to sit in your nice tidy house. :) College work will still be there when you'e ready to do it.



“Our defeats are softened and our victories are sweetened because we did it together.” - Toby Ziegler.

This isn't everything you are.


Aubergine is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 11-01-2018, 10:56 PM   #76
Cacoethes
90's B*tch
 
Cacoethes's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2008
Location: Hyrule
I am currently:

I don't know if I've met this psych before so I'll see how things go.
I never seem to be able to see the same one twice.

Yep, it'll hopefully make being awake much easier.



I'm fine! Totally fine. I don't know why it's coming out all loud and squeaky, 'cause really, I'm fine!


Who else is fine?!?!?


Cacoethes is online now   Reply With Quote
Old 11-01-2018, 11:05 PM   #77
tiptoes
Forum Mod
 
tiptoes's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: UK
I am currently:

You are such a strong person. The way you have turned your life around take grit and determination and great strength of character.

Today has been a disappointment there's no other way of putting it. Take some time let it sink in, be sad, be disappointed and when you are ready dust yourself off because you are capable of many things.

Oh and do find someone to talk to about it. x



In my dreams I slew the dragon


tiptoes is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 11-01-2018, 11:15 PM   #78
nonperson
 
nonperson's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2017
Location: London-ish
I am currently:

Really sorry to hear about the hearing. Even though it didn't go well today doesn't mean you can't try again later though (even if it is a couple of years). Never say never. =)

nonperson is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 12-01-2018, 03:29 PM   #79
Cacoethes
90's B*tch
 
Cacoethes's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2008
Location: Hyrule
I am currently:

Thank you both x

I'm still a bit upset but I'm getting over it.
Im trying to relax today and not worry about things too much.
I am very tired despite sleeping for ages. And the pharmacy didnt have my meds so going without them isn't going to help matters :/



I'm fine! Totally fine. I don't know why it's coming out all loud and squeaky, 'cause really, I'm fine!


Who else is fine?!?!?


Cacoethes is online now   Reply With Quote
Old 12-01-2018, 09:47 PM   #80
Aubergine
You've got this.
 
Aubergine's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2007
I am currently:

It's OK to be upset, but I'm glad you're getting over it. Don't push yourself too hard to feel better. It's really important that you remain positive and feel able to carry on working towards your goal, but it's also important to process your feeling about it properly.


How has you day of self-care gone?


Do you know when your pharmacy will get your meds in? Will they have them tomorrow?



“Our defeats are softened and our victories are sweetened because we did it together.” - Toby Ziegler.

This isn't everything you are.


Aubergine is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply


Currently Active Members Viewing This Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
 
Thread Tools Search this Thread
Search this Thread:

Advanced Search

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

vB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Censor is OFF
Forum Jump


Sea Pink Aroma
All times are GMT +1. The time now is 01:37 PM.