My name's Olivia and I feel like I'm pretty young to be part of a website like this - doesn't matter though. From all the stuff I've read so far I learnt that there are so many nice and creative people on here, people that are actually here to talk and maybe even help.
Now, a bit about myself: I'm from Europe,
I'm a really big fan of a band called Fall Out Boy (if you're in the mood, you can check them out! :)),
I like to draw (I'm not great though)
and I logged into this page, because everything was starting to get worse and my self-esteem was/is at rock bottom. (not going into detail in the introduction though.) I go to a pretty private school and even though I am not being bullied or harrassed, I'm kind of a loner.
I used to absolutely love to read, I've been sadly losing intrest in some of my hobbies lately.
I've never been to therapy.
I got intodruced to mental health-themes at quite a young age, at the time I was eleven - my ex best friend was 14 at the time. She admitted that she had started to self-harm and I helped her through it, now she's clean for over three years. I'm really proud of her. Ex-best friend, because well - we didn't ever dramatically fight or something, we just started to like drift apart because we just didn't click anymore, so there's no hard feelings between us.
I got into contact with themes of depression and anxiety a lot after that too, that was about when everyrhing started to go down. Well, no, it started to go down before that - I always felt sad in middleschool too, but then I just thought it was like puberty or something. One night, my really shy friend and I were texting and we were talking about online tests, so we took some. One of them was a bipolar screening test. We both took it and well, she got 3 or four (i can't really remember) out of 50 points and I scored about 47. I didn't take that as a diagnosis, I just started noticing the symptoms of mental illnesses a lot after that. I'm not saying that I have any kind of mental illness, I just think that I'm not as" normal" as I thought I was. I started thinking about self-harming quite some time ago- I never have, though. I feel like I would regret them, but I also need an outlet. I'm not sure if stuff like this fits into this forum, if not, then I'm really sorry.
I'm not trying to romaticize anything.
English is not my native language, so feel free to point out any mistakes. Send me messages whenever (I won'T be online all the time, so.) I hope everyone who read this has a nice day /night.
