1) I assume active threads will be moved and not disappear. So the Comfy Couch would still be running and nobody had to miss out on the support they get there.
2) Support threads for binge eating might get more support than on the subforum that is often overlooked.
3) It's an artificial segregation of eating disorders. Challenging the wide spread idea that anorexia and bulimia are the main EDs might be a better approach to overcome the differences in attention and support. I would like to see a board where all EDs are accepted as equal and where binging is represented as just as serious as undereating or purging. Especially new members or people who feel insecure and like their issues are less serious might benefit from treating all EDs the same.
Hope I made sense.
So that's a yes from me to the idea of reducing / getting rid of sub forums as I hope it will increase support for those that are often overlooked.
This is basically how I feel but explained much better
Quote:
Originally Posted by Pi.R^2
What makes you think it's mainly aimed at anorexic/bulimic people? It only appears that way at the moment because BED and related issues are segregated into another board, if it wasn't then it would just be a general eating disorders board.
I feel this encourages misconceptions and segregation, its a bit of a self perpetuating cycle.
Maybe in the description bit it should say 'welcomes anyone troubled by any type of eating distress'
Last edited by MissAnonymous : 04-03-2015 at 12:03 AM.
I think that regarding the Binge Eating Disorder sub forum - the main part of the ED board is for ALL eating disorders, separating BED from AN/BN is worse, because it is creating a stigma that those with other ED's to AN/BN cannot post in the general part of the forum, which in reality, they can.
To me, the title is very general, it includes all eating disorders, so if one was pointed out in particular, it may distance other ED's from the board, and make it about just one ED particularly.
I think there should be still the comfy couch thread, if that is where all the main support is going on, but in the general ED board, and remove the BED sub forum, if it's that quiet and not being used appropriately.
It doesn't mean people are excluding those who have BED and other ED's, the whole point of an eating disorder support board is that it includes ALL eating disorders, those who suffer with AN, BN, BED, Overeating disorder, and other lesser known eating disorders.
If you focus on one particular eating disorder, you're sending the wrong message, and creating more stigma/misconceptions about eating disorders in general.
All eating disorders are just as important as the next, and FYI, those with BN binge, those with AN subtype B/Ping binge, so it's not as if those with AN/BN don't understand what binging is like... so posting in the main part of the forum regarding binging, or BED, would be fully accepted and understood and related to, and if anything, would make everyone feel like they aren't alone with binging and the difficulties that come alongside it.
I think it's a big decision if you are to take away the sub forum, it may upset people, but eventually, hopefully those people will feel comfortable posting in the main board, and feel less vulnerable doing so, considering we are all struggling with similar problems.
I do understand why it was created in the first place, I remember a lot of angst and anger and upset and such regarding it, the thread being very heated, but say it was taken away, what would be so bad about that? It means joining in with the main board, and becoming part of that board, understanding the difficulties that people face with binging, because those with BN - a criteria for that is binging, those with AN subtype B/Ping definitely understand binging, so what exactly is the problem with posting in that board when people already post about binging there anyway??
I discovered in group therapy that the one i related to the most was a young woman who overate in spite me being very anorexic at the time. Who both learned a hell of a lot from each other. As it is, eating disorders are just a symptom of other underlying problems. It would be like me demanding a forum for schizophrenia only because those with personality disorders cant possibly understand what i go through snd because im a minority in comparison, it would make me uncomfortable posting.
I find that when talking to people with all kinds of eating disorders, the feelibgs connected to food are often the same, whatever the actual behavior is. Its the same guilt, same obsession, same self hatred, same lack of control etc. I actually feel quite hurt when reading people say that they wouldnt post in there because clearly we wont understand or it would make you uncomfortable. If it does that and not due to people being unsupportive then surely thats a personal issue to be challenged rather than generally encouraged. I dont see a reason why its healthy to exclude a large group of people that may relate and support simply because the behavior or weight or whatever is different. Also i dont find it healthy to single out a certain group of people that are singled out elsewhere as well, even with the best intentions.
Ive also noticed that it really doesnt seem like binge eating is a minority here anymore. It was back when the sub forum was made yes but now its often the same people postibg in ed forum and several of those are with binge issues. Its also no longer about posting the lowest bmi and weight and being generally competitive about being skinniestband eating less and so on which was problematic especially if yours wasnt low enough as it seemed to often be rhose who recieved the most support back then.
I think with the forums being as quiet as they are and things having changed, it would be best. It may take away some safety for those who use the binge forum but that can be worked on and if people are kind and give support to all, it should be no problem. Of course all change can be scary but it doesnt mean it continues to be.
And maybe keep an open mind about whether others can actually help or not instead of just assuming an anorexic or bulimic or someone with another ed entirely cannot relate. Because that is likely a misconception or even a bit of a prejudice in the head of an individual.
I also find the whole, oh this and that forum can EASILY be removed but dont touch this forum cause then we feel uncomfortable a bit troublesome. Especially when its moving just as slow as the other mentioned and the support is mainly in one specific thread that can be moved. It may be that others feel similar about the forums that you mean could easily go. Its all about what issues you have and where you post. I think it would probably be best to make the changes by looking at which forums are used the least rather than by who screams the loudest.
But yes, i am in general all for reconsidering the forums and how they are put together.
Was also thinking vets perhaps did not need two forums but rather one with more specific labeling such as "general chat" "support thread" and "graphic" etc. So that the vets can choose the threads they want to read accordingly to what they can cope with still and not get triggered but having more active forum in general.
Last edited by Morpheus : 04-03-2015 at 09:44 AM.
Den fuldkomne kærlighed,
Kan ikke eksistere blandt ufuldkomne
BORIS is barely used now with the exception of the comfy couch, so that sticky can easily be moved over to the main ED board. Plus, as has been mentioned by many people, it's important not to segregate eating issues which can make those who overeat and binge feel on the outside of things. Binging and overeating is experienced by many many people including those diagnosed with anorexia and bulimia and so lots of people will be able to relate and offer support.
The 2 vets boards can be merged into 1 as Morpheus suggested.
I think substance abuse can be merged with self injury discussion, and grief and trauma can be merged with serious.
But streamlining boards is only half of the issue. RYL has lost its sense of community over the years and until this returns then its going to be kind of empty and quiet. Some threads barely get any replied regardless of what forum they're posted in, so maybe when you're replying to threads just look out for those with 0, 1, 2 replies and just give a little support even if it's a "thinking of you" type message because that can mean a lot to someone who feels lonely.
I wonder about general chat too. To me it feels incredibly slow (I'm used to there being 2 or 3 pages of threads per day being posted there) and more and more quiz/game type threads get posted in GC so I wondered if it can be merged with the fun and distractions forum.
Isn’t it funny how day by day nothing changes but when you look back, everything is different…
you once called your brain a hard drive, well say hello to the virus.
I love BORIS and was also very much pro having a separate over eating board, but it's now just not used as it used to be. I think changing the forum description would be helpful and bringing things back together could be helpful. I know that I personally had lots of issues with feeling that what I was experiencing was not post-worthy in a forum where people had 'real' illnesses, so a more wide ranging explanation would help, if that makes sense? I no longer think a sub-forum is helpful.
I don't know what's for the best in relation to the my sub-boards as they are under used, but I don't know where else they'd fit.
Sorry, unhelpful response!
"I've learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel. Make us all feel wonderful. We'll never forget."
I agree that SI and ED boards should not be merged.
A lot of grief posts already end up in Serious anyway so it would probably go there.
Would it be renaming the forum or just getting rid of these sub forums and seeing where things go?
Also I don't think fun and distractions should go with General, at least in general you can have a discussion but FandD is just counting or surveys etc
I think Ryl is much older so there is less need for vets so I'd close it down
One board for eating issues
One board for self injury
One board for serious
One board for GSA
One board for mental health
R and v kept as is
A and b kept
First aid kept
Most threads should fit into these etc!
When we lose twenty pounds... we may be losing the twenty best pounds we have! We may be losing the pounds that contain our genius, our humanity, our love and honesty. ~Woody Allen
Is a chocolate muffin loving glitter ball
I'm pretty much in agreement with Cam on this one. At the moment the boards are too divided - like Jenna said, we don't have separate boards for all of the various MH problems so it seems silly to have so many different ones currently. Plus, any active threads in any of the current subforums can simply be moved, so it's not like they'd be lost.
Vets as a whole definitely needs to be kept. It's not so much about age, but there is a different mood there. However, merging vets general and support has been talked about SO much, maybe we should just do it and see what happens?!
Even as the stone of the fruit must break
that its heart may stand in the sun,
so must you know pain.
There are only two ways in which one can live their life. One is as though nothing is a miracle, the other is as though everything is.
First Aid Forum - I retain controversial views on this. I think it should be viewable by FAF staff and moderators. The rest of us should be able to see our own threads and threads which come up if we make specific searches in that board, or if a friend gives us a link about something they have posted about? Complicated though and confusing!
Quote:
Originally Posted by Auror.
I like the FA board existing, but I do think in a lot of cases it makes more sense if a member wants privacy to PM a FA advisor instead of posting. But I don't think it should be gotten rid of. Kim and the other advisors have given me advice that has probably saved my life and I am so grateful for that.
I have views on several things with RYL but I'm just going to keep this to the FAF. We could have a private board for FA, potentially, though I don't know how the technical side would work, but I don't think it would really be used that much and if it were I don't think as many members would get as much out as it as they have in the past or even do now. This isn't about workload or anything like that or the amount of time spent with FA in the past, personally I wouldn't mind it being changed and am open to suggestions. However, 1 thing I have had a LOT of in the past, along with past FA Team staff members is people saying how much we helped them not through our articles or through answering any of their threads but by them being able to see past threads and current ones. They've looked through there and gained info which they've needed there and then (often via searching) or have read stuff that's needed in a later date. It has been suggested before that we make it a private forum like R&V is as well as the picture thread etc but then we miss out on the people who are scared to join up and have read the advice given. We will not give advice to non members personally but we feel our advice should be made available to them. This is more the case with SH/ED related stuff and doesn't really correspond as well with the "General Medical" categories but then should they really be on the FAF? They didn't used to be not long before I joined the team and when V3 started but then that's a whole different arguement for different reasons.
We do give personal advice already in private and it remains confidential. This is via PM'ing any member of the team and whoever you PM will get back to you ASAP. You can also PM multiple members of the team which may give you a faster response. We do also still have our email address though we don't like using it and though I have been checking it more frequently recently it's still not daily and I don't get alerts through like I do with PMs. It's never going to take over that and personally I don't like using it and as a team our stance is always away from using it but it does exst and we can't ignore that.
One thing that's been bounded around for years is whether we open a unified First Aid 'user' and do most of our PMs through this so people PM 'FA' (or whatever the name would be) and then one of us will answer it asap. This has yet to happen but if there is demand for it we can look into it logistically but then we'd still have the problem that it's unlikely that we could all get email alerts from it. The other possibility which has been looked into in the past is us having access to Live Help but due to the personal commitments of the Team I don't think this would work at present, I don't think it ever really will, and also there would habe to be work to separate it between the supporters on there. The only reason I mention this is to show that there are other things that have been brought up in the past and are still currently thought about and so it's not static. Another possibility is the board looking/ acting differently from the rest but I'm unsure how that would work and actually may not in the way threads currently are in the FAF.
The board being available for all to see is really in the best interests of the majority of the users however, I would back anyone who felt that if a way was possible people could ask for advice anonymously however for it to work this probably would need the FA Team to be able to see the username of the poster for each and also this would potentially also have to be the case that forum mods saw the names too.
I'd support the two ED boards being merged too.I think people can offer valid advice whether the issue is predominantly undereating or overeating, there are common emotional aspects to both disorders. I would certainly try to offer support to threads regarding binge eating just as much as I would any threads about restricting, whereas at the moment I never really look in the BORIS sub-forum.
I'd support the merging of the substance abuse and grief/trauma forums too. Personally when I experienced bereavement I chose to post in Serious rather than grief/trauma, partly because you get more responses there but also, it was Serious, I needed support then more than over, so it fits in. I think a lot of people get support for illnesses/bereavement in General Support too, so I don't think the grief/trauma forum is particularly necessary as it is.
might bew a stupid idea, but what if the ED forums name was changed to "food and body issues" or something like that. Just something that is a bit more vauge and sort of open
I think a name change would be good, or at least an updated board description.
I think it can be hard for members to post sometimes if they don't have a diagnosed eating disorder. Sometimes that can be extra hard for people who struggle with overeating because, although, BED etc., is an eating disorder, it often isn't really viewed that way. I feel like a more open title might make things a bit easier for some people.
eta: I really like the suggestion of "Food and Body Issues" or something along those lines. :)
"I know you're sad, so I won't tell you to have a good day. Instead, I advise you to simply have a day.
Stay alive, feed yourself well, wear comfortable clothes, and don't give up on yourself just yet.
It'll get better. Until then, have a day."
I can see your opinion/point of view regarding name change, maybe something like "Eating Difficulties Support"? Keep it simple, and it is for everything eating related, including disordered eating, eating disorders, and binging is included in that.
