Oh Katy my love I'm so sorry. After all you've been through. I'm not gonna lie ive shed some tears for you. Life can be a f***ing bitch sometimes. I know I don't know you awfully well but of you need anything let me know.
My average working week is about 50 hours with each shift being 10-12 hours and im not sleeping for more than a few hours at a time and im just so exhausted.
I think you are working too much. Baby won't grow if you do too much and get too tired like that. Is there any possibility of cutting down.
Even as the stone of the fruit must break
that its heart may stand in the sun,
so must you know pain.
There are only two ways in which one can live their life. One is as though nothing is a miracle, the other is as though everything is.
The contract im on is a minimum 48 hours one so theres not really any room
for cutting down.
Im a manager of a music venue/night club so its all backwards work, and im currently in the middle of training my assistant
to duty manage for whilst im away. We have about 10 events a week and for the last few years its just been myself and someone
else managing them so to stop doing the hours before the assistant is fully
competent would put us all in the ****.
I have a meeting next week with the operations manager of te entire
group to discuss being able to move onto day time operations or at least just show set up come the beginning of June. Or to see if theres anything i can do during office hours from head office instead of the venue to help prepare for festivals. I think they might be sending me to other venues within the estate to train some of the other managers.
Im also going to discuss being able to come back to more part time hours after lottle one is born. I think i would go insane being off work for the full 39 weeks but i dont want to be away from him for half of every day.
Chances are that if i request that and they are able to action it i wont get my pay rise but i think it'll be worth it.
They have a legal obligation to assess your risk at work, and like effervescence said, working long (and unsociable) hours is not good for you or baby. I understand you have to weigh everything up and it's important to train your assistant atm but you would have a very good case if they refuse to make adequate changes to your working environment particularly as your pregnancy progresses. I think it would be wise for you to refuse to work constant nights for much longer, and also to reduce your working week to fewer than 35 hours a week, they also need to ensure that you are given plenty of opportunity to sit and rest.
I know pregnancy isn't an illness, (it's far from that!) but it's definitely a time when women have a huge increased demand on them, and therefore require increased rest and relaxation in order to help you both stay healthy.
*not intended as a lecture, just passionate advice*
lots of love to all you lovely yummy mummies and mummies-to-be <3
They have a legal obligation to assess your risk at work, and like effervescence said, working long (and unsociable) hours is not good for you or baby. I understand you have to weigh everything up and it's important to train your assistant atm but you would have a very good case if they refuse to make adequate changes to your working environment particularly as your pregnancy progresses. I think it would be wise for you to refuse to work constant nights for much longer, and also to reduce your working week to fewer than 35 hours a week, they also need to ensure that you are given plenty of opportunity to sit and rest.
I know pregnancy isn't an illness, (it's far from that!) but it's definitely a time when women have a huge increased demand on them, and therefore require increased rest and relaxation in order to help you both stay healthy.
*not intended as a lecture, just passionate advice*
lots of love to all you lovely yummy mummies and mummies-to-be <3
mummys and future mummies are very special and deserve the utmost care
Beckie, contractions feel slightly different to everyone. For most people, they start like period pains in waves, so dull ache around lower back and abdomen... they get stronger and more intense (to point out the obvious!) but usually this is a gradual increase.
At first women can usually talk through them; when they are regular (every 2-3 mins), last 30-60 seconds and you aren't able to talk through them anymore, that's usually the time the real fun begins
Usually, if you are able to work with them, not fight them and stay nice and relaxed, you won't have too many difficulties!
Sorry for the mini essay there, hope it helps a little. But again, completely different for everyone, so will explain it slightly differently x
mummys and future mummies are very special and deserve the utmost care
true dat! Take care of yourself Charlie :)
Thanks Sam and jocelyn. I've got this fear that ill have contractions and not know, because I get random stomach pain anyway.
This goes with the fear of my waters breaking and just thinking I've pissed myself!
I'm fine! Totally fine. I don't know why it's coming out all loud and squeaky, 'cause really, I'm fine!
i was terrified of wetting myself and thinking my waters had broken and then going into hopsital and them saying "no they havent you wet yourself" because i constantly needed the loo and found i had to rush to the toilet alot so worried i would have an accident, also i was terrified of my waters breaking on the bus and then people being really nasty about it, luckly i was induced so i was in hospital when my waters broke (although the midwife who i called when it happend- in the early hours had a little bit of a go at me because i thought i was wetting myself so got out of the bed and it went all over the floor and she made me get back into my wet bed, which was a little bit annoying she was nice afterwards though because she let my partner come in at 6 in the morning so i could have a bath to help the contractions)
i also constantly wiped and looked for blood from the minute i found out i was pregnant because im a little paronoid like that.
with my contractions i felt my stomach kind of go hard and then had a pain that i had to stop talking and breath through, even from the beginning i must have been a wimp because it was really painful and then when i was put on the drip it got bad really fast. i feel like a wimp though because i had an epidural so soon and wish i had tried to cope with the contractions abit longer i could also tell when one was coming as the pain sort of builds up during the contraction and then dies down, like a wave so the worst bit is like right in the middle of the contraction.
I'm sorry you feel like that about having an epidural, but people cope with pain differently, and at different levels and the epidurals are available for that reason :)
Xx
I'm fine! Totally fine. I don't know why it's coming out all loud and squeaky, 'cause really, I'm fine!
^ so true, also Polly when you're on that drip the contractions are a lot worse, they aren't natural contractions. I haven't known anyone to not have an epidural when they had a drip to build up their contractions!
I also had an epidural because I was induced and because of my pre-eclampsia they wanted me to have it as it brings your blood pressure down. They insisted on giving it to me quite early on so I had only experienced a few period pain type contractions before it kicked in. After almost 5 years I still feel cheated, I wasn't in control and I felt coerced into making decisions I wasn't happy with.
From my own personal experience, witnessing others and clear research evidence, one of the most important factors for satisfaction of the birth is a sense of control. Always ask questions, don't agree to anything you don't fully understand (unless a clear emergency of course, but you should still be told what's going on!) and don't let anyone do anything to you that you aren't comfortable with! It's so important!
Last edited by [Awakening] : 15-04-2012 at 09:49 AM.
Reason: poor grammar :-/
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mummys and future mummies are very special and deserve the utmost care 
i could also tell when one was coming as the pain sort of builds up during the contraction and then dies down, like a wave so the worst bit is like right in the middle of the contraction.