This year we had Panettonne at Christmas in some shocking attempt at climbing the ladder of social class. Not as effective when your accent makes it rhyme with 'fanny bun'. However it was pre bought and so there was no firey disasters of an Italian sort to be had, but our glorious leader David C might have had some opinions on the pigs in blankets.
I don't know what Panettone is. I could google it, but it's something that a pineapple hater likes, so chances are, it's rubbish.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Indigo.
I love Panettone!!
I was worried that no one has had Italian during this festive period. We had pasta(not made by me) the other day but I couldn't have any because I felt very sick. Oh, the rage, the frustration! I have been deprived of Italian food(and cigarettes) all through Christmas, and was forced to 'enjoy' the traditional British Christmas Dinner. Yuck.
.
As a Christmas dinner hater, I feel your pain. Mucho stressful. I did not manage much Italian over the festive period but I am making up for this error right now.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Pi.R^2
I would like to say that when I cooked my pasta this evening there was a strong smell of burning but both my pasta and the oven glove showed no signs of burning, I am deeply confused and require support.
Slightly late, but sending supportive hugs. Perhaps it's your singed oven glove coming back to haunt you.
Founder of: Capstealy avoidance method 3 aka The Steph Da First Method The picture above was kindly created by Sentient Treacle (leafy girl)
It was uninteresting. Topping was pepperoni. Average. Cooked well but not burned. It appears I am becoming more successful at Italian Cusine. Please celebrate with me. My time to shine has come.
Founder of: Capstealy avoidance method 3 aka The Steph Da First Method The picture above was kindly created by Sentient Treacle (leafy girl)
Sorry to bother you all but in need of top notch support after a traumatic Italian Cusine crisis involving a badly behaved bolognaise. I hope you all all understand my need to come here and share this with u.
So I tried to have spaghetti bolognaise for lunch/dinner today. I had been super duper organised and frozen a few portions a couple of weeks ago. Seemingly simple situation? Italian Cusine is never straightforward.
So I stir my bolognaise and catch a bit of an odd smell. Now I am a little weird at the mo so at first I assume it is me being a complete crank and having sensory issues so I continue to cook. Five minutes later and I am totally convinced that my bolognaise is poisonously off etc etc. How mischievous. My immediate thought was to put the contents into a plastic food bag in order to keep the upsetting smelly food all in one place. For reasons which I have not yet got to the bottom of, I thought that it would be a fantastic idea to do this OVER THE HOB. Firstly I completely missed meaning bolognaise slopped onto the hob and began to bubble. Sob. U might think my woe could end here, but no. *breathes* So apparently putting a plastic bag on a hob isn't good, and neither is filling it with hot contents. I lift the bag and begin my short but fatal journey to the bin. BAG HAS THREE OR MORE HOLES AND MISCHEVIOUS BOLOGNAISE FALLS ALL OVER ME AND DA FLOOR. By this point I am totally mortified. To make life worse the kitchen roll decided at this moment to run out, resulting in the use of rather thin toilet paper to mop up the mischievous bolognaise.
It is safe to say that I am feeling pretty traumatised. I look forward to hearing kind words from u all.
Founder of: Capstealy avoidance method 3 aka The Steph Da First Method The picture above was kindly created by Sentient Treacle (leafy girl)
Hugs bbe. I'm sorry about your mayonnaise, it sounds awfully mischievous. Maybe have a bath and a cup of vodka?
I also feel like Jenna might need some support right now. Last night she was given blagsagne. Called such because it only had one lasagne sheet. This was made more of a disaster by the first Italian restaurant we went to being full. Jenna had felt unable to book us a table in advance because of her ICAD (Italian Cuisine Anxiety Disorder). As fellow sufferers I felt we should give her hugs and maybe send bags of penne pasta?
Oh god I want to hear you say,
I want to hear you say that you were wrong again
This is the first thing
I have understood:
Time is the echo of an axe
Within a wood.
I'm honestly dying of laughter too much right now to be able to offer any actual support but I will come back to this and in the meantime, you can PM me anytiem Steph. That sounds horrifically distressing. Someone wittier than me please come up with a version of PTSD that relates to italian cuisine so that we can diagnose Steph with it.
Cara, thnx 4 da support. To add insult to injury (I didn't mention this at the time as I didn't want to cause A Scene), there were what tasted like little cubes of potato in the lasagne. Overall, 0/10 italian cuisine experience, moving from a 0 to a 3 if we take into account the company of a Top Scouser (the waiter probs doesn't feel the same though)
Hugs bbe. I'm sorry about your mayonnaise, it sounds awfully mischievous. Maybe have a bath and a cup of vodka?
I also feel like Jenna might need some support right now. Last night she was given blagsagne. Called such because it only had one lasagne sheet. This was made more of a disaster by the first Italian restaurant we went to being full. Jenna had felt unable to book us a table in advance because of her ICAD (Italian Cuisine Anxiety Disorder). As fellow sufferers I felt we should give her hugs and maybe send bags of penne pasta?
Quote:
Originally Posted by Pi.R^2
I'm honestly dying of laughter too much right now to be able to offer any actual support but I will come back to this and in the meantime, you can PM me anytiem Steph. That sounds horrifically distressing. Someone wittier than me please come up with a version of PTSD that relates to italian cuisine so that we can diagnose Steph with it.
Cara, thnx 4 da support. To add insult to injury (I didn't mention this at the time as I didn't want to cause A Scene), there were what tasted like little cubes of potato in the lasagne. Overall, 0/10 italian cuisine experience, moving from a 0 to a 3 if we take into account the company of a Top Scouser (the waiter probs doesn't feel the same though)
Thanks for the support both. Where would I be without my fellow disastras?
Jenna be kind to yourself. It happens to us all. That lasagne dish sounds irrevocably disgusting. Which Italian Cusine supplier did you dine at? I'll get a bag of penne in the post immediately. Good idea leafy one.
Maybe a diagnosis will help with my distress. I am glad you guys think this is appropriate. Post Traumatic Italian Cusine Disorder (PTICD) describes my woe perfectly.
What did leafy one do to offend the waiter? I am intrigued and feel it may be an event that could be shared with the fellow Disastras on this thread for the benefit of us all!
Founder of: Capstealy avoidance method 3 aka The Steph Da First Method The picture above was kindly created by Sentient Treacle (leafy girl)
Firstly Steph, apologies for not making a more serious post in the wake of your Italian Cuisine disastra. What a traumatic experience- frankly just the emotional hurricane that comes with preparing bolognaise that turns out to be off would be enough to call the situation a disastra, so the bolognaise on the hob and then the holes in the bags leading to bolognaise on da floor and having no kitchen roll with which to clean it up would have pushed me right over the edge. No wonder you have PTICD. I will endeavour to send you some sympathy fuscilli. Also I'll leave the leafy one (DID YOU SEE WHAT I DID THERE) to tell the waiter story.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Doikers
Has anyone ever tried to make their own pasta from scratch?
It's impossible.
I swear there must be an animal out there that shits rigatoni . . . .
I have not, but similarly to Steph, previous italian cuisine disastras mean I daren't attempt such a feat! I wish you all the best in your attempts though! Please do share your experiences and results.
Firstly Steph, apologies for not making a more serious post in the wake of your Italian Cuisine disastra. What a traumatic experience- frankly just the emotional hurricane that comes with preparing bolognaise that turns out to be off would be enough to call the situation a disastra, so the bolognaise on the hob and then the holes in the bags leading to bolognaise on da floor and having no kitchen roll with which to clean it up would have pushed me right over the edge. No wonder you have PTICD. I will endeavour to send you some sympathy fuscilli. Also I'll leave the leafy one (DID YOU SEE WHAT I DID THERE) to tell the waiter story.
I thought it was particularly rude of you Jenna, to not provide me with a prompt supportive reply, but I'll let it slip.
I don't even think the bolognaise was off. I was just suffering with my PTICD, which made me believe that it was a disastra from the beginning.
Come one leafy girl, show up and elaborate please.
