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Old 07-06-2010, 02:09 PM   #1
mab
 
Join Date: Jun 2010
I am currently:
Possibly Triggering - alone in my silence


Alone in my silence
This is not one of contentment
A prisoner of my thoughts
Words have become meaningless

Struggling to be free from this silence
Condemned in my silence
It has been my greatest strength
This silence now my abuser

Standing outside looking in
Is this the time to stop fighting?
Should I continue to succumb to their demands?
Life can be so harsh and unforgiving

Inner thoughts and demons are tormenting me.
Sending me further along the path of self destruction
They have their hold on my will
I am subservient and do their will

Will I ever feel clean or worthy of being?
Will I continue to be punished by these demons?
Am I now void of all feeling and emotion?
Void of reasoning and understanding

Now all weak and relenting to my demons
Allowing them to do their will
Dreams are not familiar, nightmares fill my nights
Tormented in a world of darkness.

Having accepted these beings, these demons!
They now have my will and my very soul.
They command and rule my very existence
They reinforce their power at every turn

Never to be free from their will
The fight has quietly been sapped away
Its evil will and hold is all I know
No other will is known to me

Having become an accepting and willing victim
It empowers me with its will, not mine
Drained and now void of will and fight
They have filled me with self hate and loathing.

My past continues to torment me
Pain, sadness and loneliness are known to me
Becoming their willing victim
Now I have become my own abuser

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Old 07-06-2010, 08:26 PM   #2
EpicFailGirl
You're never gonna be like anyone, and that's OK.
 
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Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: London
I am currently:

i wont patronise you by trying to say something on the content, but i will comment on the style =]

it can be hard to keep a non-rhyming poem as poetry, but the four lines thing stops it rambling into prose. the lines are a constant length, which helps =]

its got a good development, for a poem that long, so yeah, its sad to read, emotionally, but good to read, poetically =]



So if you wanna burn yourself remember that
I love you

And if you wanna cut yourself remember that
I love you

And if you wanna kill yourself remember that
I love you

Call me up before you're dead
We can make some plans instead

Send me an IM, I'll be your friend
Kimya Dawson - Loose Lips - Juno Soundtrack


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