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Old 15-06-2009, 10:14 PM   #1
Katiee
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Possibly Triggering - How To Get Better.

Hey Guys,

Haha, I bet no one will read this, but ah well.

Since September I've been feeling so much better in myself. Things have been going really good for me. I've changed a lot, anyone who knows me will tell you that.

For the past 4/5 years up until September I was majorly derpessed. I had sleeping and eating problems. I had no confidence or self esteem. I was self-harming everyday. I hated myself. I cried myself to sleep. I pushed everyone away. I felt alone and distressed most of the time. I was also very sucidal. I was a mess, I wanted to end everything.

In September I attempted suicide at school (Long story to as of why I did it at school). After that while I was recovering in hospital I needed to think about where I was going after I got out of hospital. It took a lot of thinking. I'd already figured out why I felt so bad and everything before my sucide attempt, so I didn't have to figure that out.

So I thought and thought and finally came to the conclusion that I was the one who had to move forward, no one else. I shouldn't be depending on and blaming other people to 'make me better', give me 'the answers' or 'a magical cure'. I'm the one who has take the stepping stones. Plus I'm also one of those people that don't like being told what to do. So I didn't want any doctor, counsellor, pysch, ect telling me what I need to do in order to get better. I wanted to do it myself, so I can do it in my own time, when I'm ready and the way I want to. :]

This is my life I wrote all by myself, which I've followed to get to where I am now.

1. Keep up personal hygiene even if you really don't feel like it. Force yourself. e.g. shower everyday, change clothes, ect.

2. Do at least 30 minutes of exercise each day. It will keep your stress levels down. e.g. dance in your room to your favourite songs, go for a mini walk to the park with your ipod on, walk around the house if you don't feel like going outside.

3. Write at least of 20, yes 20 things that you can do as distractions that work when you feel down/triggered. e.g. listen to music, watch TV, hold ice, ect.

4. Learn and pratice breathing exercises, as this will help when you're in stressful situations and it'll also relax you. e.g. in exams.

(Mouth closed, inhale slowly through your nose and count to five, then breathe out slowly counting to 8).

5. Try listening to 'happy' songs instead of depressing music. e.g. sex bomb - Tom Jones, you can't stop the beat - Hairspray, walking on sunshine - Katrina & The Waves, ect.

6. Do not keep things bottled up inside - this does you NO favours.. vent it all out. e.g. talk to a family member, friend, helpline, post on support websites, ect.

7. If you have a problem which is triggering you/upsetting you and it won't sort itself out.. then you need to figure out how you're going to sort it. Personally, if I have a problem I go to my mum and my mum sorts it all out for me. Though for you this might be different. So find an adult who is helpful who you can talk to or try sorting out the problems yourself - but it's harder that way.

8. Try eating three meals a day.. if you can't because of an ED then just eat little and often throughout the day like I do and still do!. e.g. something every 1-2 hours.

9. Try drinking as much water as you can through the day. (:

10. Try opening up to someone about your problems/what you're going through more.. the more they know the more they'll be able to help/support you. If you feel you can't talk to them face to face about your past/current problems maybe write them a letter and give it to them.

11. Sleep is important for people with depression.. they either sleep too little like you or too much like me :P.. you should be getting 8 hours or more of sleep a night. Try not going on the computer or watch TV at least an hour before you go to bed, have a hot milky drink if you want, have a warm bath/shower, maybe even try sleep therapy like me if you want.. if you want to know more about it then you can ask me! See if you can increase how much sleep you're getting, even if it's only by one hour - ohh and try getting up and going to bed at the same time everyday if possible.

12. BE POSITIVE EVEN ON DAYS WHEN YOU FEEL SO LOW.
when you have time write 10 things that are positive about you/your life.
Every morning when you get up and/or when you go to sleep say something positive to yourself, "I am strong" "I can do this" "I'm not breaking", ect.

13. If need be, don't help other people. I know that sounds horrible but sometimes getting involved/helping someone else can get in the way of your recovery (unless of course you do it as a distraction or it helps you/keeps you busy)

14. Set yourself mini goals to reach (e.g get to a certain number of days without harming or taking part in white wednesday or something)

13. Your harming: if you're counting it's up to you weather you do it in days, hours, minutes, seconds.. I mean I've done it in seconds on my wrost day before! Every second is another bit of progress!

14. Suicide: Don't make plans/notes. If you have any plans for suicide attmpts and/or notes please destory them.

15. Take it day by day! xD

That's my list, remember though recovery is different for everyone! What might work for you, might not work for someone else. :]

I didn't do all this at once! It's like juggling, you start off with one ball (e.g keeping up personal hygiene) then once you're keeping that up add another ball.. (e.g. a little exercise each day) until you're keeping up your personal hygiene and doing exercise and keep adding when you feel ready. Get me?

Since follwing my getting better list I've achieved all this;

1. I've gone over 4 months without self-harming in any form.
2. I'm managing to get through urges without getting into a state.
3. I can go out the house without feeling anxious.
4. I can have a conversation with someone I've never met before and not feel apprehensive.
5. All suicide thoughts, notes and behavouir are completely gone. (not including thoughts about my suicide attempt - it doesn't count).
6. I no longer isolate myself in my bedrooom 24/7.
7. I go out loads more than I used to.
8. I don't spend all day on the laptop anymore.
9. I've done everything that has been expected of me at my special school I go to now (once a week)
10. I have no where near have as much anxiety as I used to.
11. I don't cry myself to sleep anymore.
12. I'm more confident in myself.
13. I don't hate myself anymore.
14. I'm positive about things in life.
15. I feel in control of myself and my life.
&& lots moreee! xD

It's just so woah! Lol. (:

I still have a long way to go through, but I've done absolutley amazing so far! There's no reason why anyone on here can't make their own 'getting better' list (:

Though I think people need to realize that YOU'RE the one who has to pick yourself up and put yourself on the right road and walk along it. YOU'RE recovery and happiness comes from YOU, no one else. You shouldn't depend on other people to make that happen. I think people forget that when they're in a bad situation/place, but that's ok but I forgot when I was ill, so I don't blame any of you guys here (just to make it clear). I used to blame the doctors for being as 'ill' as I was because they didn't have a 'magical cure' to make me better, until I realize I HAD the magical cure. (:

Even though I'm doing the recovering, I still have a MHN and psych to just support me along the way and that's ok as long as you don't expect them to take the steps for you! (:

I think ya'll are awesome and all deserve happiness and ya'll will get there one day. You may not believe it now, but trust me you will. Much love. xo.


Last edited by Katiee : 17-06-2009 at 03:55 PM.


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Old 15-06-2009, 10:16 PM   #2
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Amazing thread written by an amazing person (:
Love youu Katie (:

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Old 15-06-2009, 10:19 PM   #3
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Wow katie, you are incredialy strong and its really really good youre getting better.

That list was very helpful, thankyou xxxxxx





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Old 15-06-2009, 11:34 PM   #4
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Great post! Thank you so much for sharing & well done =]



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Old 17-06-2009, 12:57 AM   #5
Katiee
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Thanks guys, (:



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Old 17-06-2009, 01:37 AM   #6
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Yeah I had a therapy appt today. and the therapist once again said she couldnt help me or doesnt know how to help me--i have to start making changes. i think your list will give me some ideas.


Oh, what's the sleep therapy you were talking about?


Last edited by jalita : 17-06-2009 at 01:40 AM. Reason: added something


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Old 17-06-2009, 02:00 AM   #7
Katiee
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Quote:
Originally Posted by jalita View Post
Yeah I had a therapy appt today. and the therapist once again said she couldnt help me or doesnt know how to help me--i have to start making changes. i think your list will give me some ideas.


Oh, what's the sleep therapy you were talking about?
Hey,
Awh that's great! :]
Sleep therapy is a spray you use before you go to sleep. You just spray the sleep therapy onto your pillow or into the room to create a relaxing atmosphere to enhance sleep. (: It's great! Works wonders for me. :) xo.



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Old 17-06-2009, 02:39 AM   #8
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wow.
thanks so much for this thread.
i am printing it off!!!!!

im so glad you are feeling better:) xooox



"They say time heals all wounds. I don't agree. The wounds remain. In time, the mind, protecting its sanity, covers them with scar tissue and the pain lessons, but it is never gone." - Rose Kennedy

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Old 17-06-2009, 02:45 AM   #9
Katiee
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Quote:
Originally Posted by eyes.wide.open View Post
wow.
thanks so much for this thread.
i am printing it off!!!!!

im so glad you are feeling better:) xooox
Awhh! :')



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Old 17-06-2009, 03:06 AM   #10
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Sweetie i just read it all and how amazing are u im proud of u its not easy what u have done but u have made remarkable steps in recovery so i wish u all the best on the next steps good luck best wishs jad



Don't walk behine me I might got you lost!
Don't walk in front of me I may not follow you!
Don't walk beside me the path is to small!

All we can do is walk our own paths,remember your not alone because we are all walking our own paths together!

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Old 17-06-2009, 03:33 AM   #11
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That just makes me smile, it's so great to hear how far you have come =)
Great thread! I'm sure it will be an eye-opener for some on here, or at least I hope it will be! Thanks for posting this.



"You are imperfect and you are wired for struggle, but you are worthy of love and belonging." -Brene Brown


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Old 17-06-2009, 09:08 AM   #12
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You are amazing.
This is amazing.
I'm so glad you've come so far, congratulations.

One little thing...
Quote:
Originally Posted by Katiee View Post
8. Try eating three meals a day.. if you can't because of an ED then just eat little and often throughout the day like I do and still do!. e.g. someone every 1-2 hours.
Eat someone every 1-2 hours?
I assume it's a typo, well I hope it is hehe. Made me giggle.
It's still an amazing list though!






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Old 17-06-2009, 10:07 AM   #13
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aaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhh you're awesome :D
what a star, fantastic useful tips [that took me many years to learn & are life-long skills!]

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Old 17-06-2009, 11:32 AM   #14
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Fantastic thread Katie, thank you <3

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Old 17-06-2009, 11:40 AM   #15
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Thanks for sharing and well done on how far you have come :)



"Recovery is something that you have to work
on every single day and it's
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Old 17-06-2009, 01:57 PM   #16
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Thanks for sharing that, you are amazing to have achieved this. =]
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Just find the horizon I promise you it's not as far as you think.


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Old 17-06-2009, 03:54 PM   #17
Katiee
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Quote:
Originally Posted by KatieFrank View Post
You are amazing.
This is amazing.
I'm so glad you've come so far, congratulations.

One little thing...

Eat someone every 1-2 hours?
I assume it's a typo, well I hope it is hehe. Made me giggle.
It's still an amazing list though!
Ahhh, omg! nooo I DON'T EAT PEOPLE!



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Old 17-06-2009, 09:21 PM   #18
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great advice Katiee

1. I shower every day.
2. I go out for a walk for at least 30 minutes after dinner.
3. Maybe not 20 things, but I go to voluntary work, other things I know I can help me but I can't be bothered to do them, I keep putting it off until tomorrow, but tomorrow never comes.
4. Breathing helps immensely, you explain it very well, relaxing your shoulders also helps to get oxygen around your body properly, & do it maybe for an hour at a time.
5. I wouldn't listen to Tom Jones myself, but there's always other good music to listen too.
6. Some people don't want to hear it, but there should always be someone who'll have a sympathetic ear, but sometimes it's difficult to talk to someone who's feeling really down.
7. Most people don't suffer badly & can deal with situations OK without panicking, you may have to rely on for help in a situation that you can't deal with yourself.
8. I don't eat breakfast most mornings, I'll admit that, I mostly just have a coffee & a cigarette, but I always have lunch & dinner, food's been a real problem for me over the years.
9. Keeping hydrated is so important, apparently half of the population are dehydrated at any one time even though they may not realise it.
10. That's why I come on chat here a lot.
11. I sleep way too much, 9-10 hours a night.
12. It's hard to think positive it takes a lot of energy when you feel negative, I was fearful about injury, being crippled but I found an inner strength to overcome that & think positive but it took a lot of energy.
13. YES, be patient, somehow resist the urge because in one year's time today will be one year ago, & you'll think 'why did I give in over a year ago when I should've resisted?'
14. I should be dead by now, but I'm not. I stopped making suicide plans because when it came to it I decided that it would be better to live until I literally can't live anymore.
15. when you go to bed at night, it's another day gone that you lived through.

&, I hope so - if there's any justice in life - anyone how gets through this crap deserves to lead a better life than someone how's never suffered in the first place.



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Old 17-06-2009, 11:18 PM   #19
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Thanks Katiee, that advice has really helped me. Ill try and take it on board, everything you said, however hard it may be.

Thanks.
Shinee.x



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Old 28-06-2009, 11:10 PM   #20
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Katie sweetheart, you have no idea how much this list (and you!) have helped me over the past few months...and i am positive you've both helped so many others too!

Love you xxx

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