Tierra~Fighting for life, but losing the battle. .
Join Date: Apr 2006
Location: US
I am currently:
Dad. . .I'm sorry, I wish I could have stopping you from killing yourself. I can't.
Mom. . .I hurt everyday. You hurt me for so many years, but I still love you. I just wish I could tell you how I was feeling without being judged. I'm sorry.
i never .knew i could hate someone so much but at the same time love them... you dont know the damage you have caused me. the pain you given me. the scars you have left on me...i can never forgive you...you were the one who taught me to hurt myself because you hurt me....i hate you, and i just cant wait to leave you. it will break my heart, but i need to stick up for myself....im sorry, but i have to go
in other traditions demons are expelled externally, but in my tradition demons are accepted with compassion. - Machik Labdron
they were perfect, they were beautiful. they met in the middle of nowhere, in the middle of nothing, and kissed where everyone could see. no words. no before. no after. they kissed and it was perfect. it was beautiful. it was everything. it was nothing.
Please, just give me a break. I'm beginning to wish I hadn't given you it. I know you're worried but I can't cope with anymore stress. I'm a lot younger than you - why should I have to support you? I'm normally a supportive person if I can control when I do it, but every 5 ****ing minutes is too much. I'm so unstable myself, I'm in the middle of exams which I'm failing, my school are trying to kick me out. The last thing I need is someone that I don't even know texting me every 5 minutes.
why do you have to be so cute sometimes? You're making this hard. The fact is you cheated but I'm not sure how to get angry or upset at you, because you cheated on me with a guy. How come I didn't realise you were having those feelings? 2 years my angel. That's how long we've been together. And it just didn't click. I have no idea how to even bring up the subject. Help me out here, i need some sort of lead. I love you. I always will.
*Do you believe in what you see, motionless wheel, Nothing is real
Ah and I'll shout, I'll scream,
But I'd rather not be seen, and I'll hide away...
For another day*
damn, you knew I couldn't do it without you, but you went anyway. I miss you so so much, but I know I'm never going to see you again. Not until I reach the other side.
I know you need me right now, but I can't handle it. Not that. I'm sorry, it's just too close to home, and I can't deal with it. I know, I know you were there for me, but I'm not you, and I'm just useless, ok?
I know you think I should be over it by now, it's been a few weeks, and according to you I wasn't that close to either of them anyway, but hell, I still miss him, and yes, I still cry about it almost every day. I know it's not good, but everyone thinks I'm over it, and I just can't talk to anyone.
D, I know, I know you've got exams and your own stuff going on right now, but I need you. Or maybe I don't. Maybe I just need someone to acknowledge that I'm not ok. **** it. I can't deal with anything. God's I'm so desperate. You saved me last time, can you do it again? No. We've grown further apart since then. I feel like I hardly know you anymore.
~Friends are angels who lift us to our feet when our wings have trouble remembering how to fly~
I know you're hurting too, but why can't you ever be there for me? I thought you were my best friend, but I feel like you don't even care. Can't you see how much I hurt? Can't you do something to help me? I'll always love you but right now you're actually making my life harder than it already is. Help me please.
The one you love and the one who loves you are never, ever the same person.
