Live Help

Forum Jump
Post New Thread  Reply
Old 14-10-2014, 07:43 PM   #1
Join Date: Oct 2014
Reviews Requested- Safe - Life Long Tsunami

Life Long Tsunami

There is no high ground.
Behind us the ocean stands
with its back arched,
creeping forward,
waiting to crash down on its prey.

The leviathan lumbers
slow as life
across fields and cities,
following me, or us,
steady, hulking, hungry.

The water is viscous dusk,
swirling for split moments into view
the contents of its belly;
cross-sections of homes;
the ones that fell behind,

and we remember why we run.
Faster than the days ago
when the devourer
overscored the horizon.
My folly was slow pace

in safety. Now I must run,
breathless, from danger.
And it creeps nearer,
gaping from trough to crest.
The time to rest has passed.

Closer comes the low roar
from behind; from within,
knives push their way out of my lungs.
Only my skin finds pleasure
in the thick cool mists

that reassure the foreboding
of drowning;
just more debris.
Soon will come the moment
in which I must forget running,

remember myself, and sink
into a dream, clear and warm,
where the sunrays dance
like gentle serpentine lightning
as I breath air smooth as water.

KidTronic is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 15-10-2014, 12:50 AM   #2
chopingirl1810's Avatar
Join Date: Aug 2014
I am currently:

This is really good, very descriptive. Also a great analogy. I liked the little personification of the ocean, "creeping forward"... Really cool.

"Mistakes and failures are great teachers. They provide the opportunity to learn and grow stronger, and more capable. The only ones who never fail, are those who never try."

"Go confidently in the direction of your dreams! Live the life you've imagined." -Thoreau

"I can't rewrite what's already perfect."--Amadeus, the Movie

chopingirl1810 is offline   Reply With Quote

Currently Active Members Viewing This Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
Thread Tools Search this Thread
Search this Thread:

Advanced Search

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

vB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Censor is ON
Forum Jump

Sea Pink Aroma
All times are GMT +1. The time now is 01:36 PM.