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Old 30-10-2012, 08:14 PM   #1
SayYou'llBeMyNightingale
 
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please help me

does anyone think its stupid if i cut over a guy cos people i know are calling me pathetic and saying im attention seeking when im not. one of my teachers found out at school and called my dad about it and he shouted at me, called me and idiot. but they dont understand, please tell me what you think

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Old 30-10-2012, 08:17 PM   #2
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Hm, I wouldn't call it stupid. That's a rude thing to say. But I feel like no guy is worth your time if he's making you feel like cutting. Trust me, I've been down that road plenty of times where a guy has made me feel so low that I had to cut because he made me hate myself that much. It's not worth it over a guy. But people shouldn't be calling you names, especially your father. But maybe your father doesn't know how to handle it, knowing his daughter is hurting that bad.

True, they don't understand. But I do in a sense. What about the guy made you want to cut?






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Old 30-10-2012, 08:28 PM   #3
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I dont think its stupid at all. Whatever the cause - relationship problems, him making you feel bad about yourself, a breakup, etc - thats real pain and it shouldnt be demeaned like that. Your dad especially shouldn't be saying things like that. I know my mom did but looking back i think it was cause she was scared/worried for me and overreacting, even if it was hurtful stuff like 'its a middle schooler phase' or 'your a selfish little bitch' or 'you have nothing to be upset about, look what my life was like growing up'.

But anyways, in conclusion, yeah i dont think its pathetic at all. People shouldn't say stuff like that to you.

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Old 30-10-2012, 08:43 PM   #4
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thankyou

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Old 30-10-2012, 11:38 PM   #5
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it isn't stupid, because you're clearly distressed. and in the short term, harming yourself is a way to cope with those feelings. however, it isn't a good thing to do either. it would be great if you could find another way of handling your feelings that doesn't hurt you.




this is my magical medicine cabinet. Left to right they contain: courage, hope, calmness, and strength.

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Old 31-10-2012, 06:45 AM   #6
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I agree totaly with JenniRose for very similar reasons. no person is worth you harming youself.

can understand why that would upset you and i agree with people who say that your dad was over reacting to being helpless.

you need to start thinking about why you are reacting this way and what you are getting out of it?
Also starting to think about other ways that will give you the same result that dont involve harming yourself.
at the begining it can seem hard and kinda pointless but we are all here to support you and you can do it :)

good luck hunny,

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Old 31-10-2012, 07:48 AM   #7
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HELP

does anyone know anyways to help keep me distracted from cutting that atualy work and does anyone think its stupid if i cut over a guy cos people i know are calling me pathetic and saying im attention seeking when im not. one of my teachers found out at school and called my dad about it and he shouted at me, called me and idiot. but they dont understand, please tell me what you think


Last edited by SayYou'llBeMyNightingale : 31-10-2012 at 08:06 AM.
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Old 31-10-2012, 07:52 AM   #8
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help

does anyone know anyways to help keep me distracted from cutting that atualy work and does anyone think its stupid if i cut over a guy cos people i know are calling me pathetic and saying im attention seeking when im not. one of my teachers found out at school and called my dad about it and he shouted at me, called me and idiot. but they dont understand, please tell me what you think

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Old 31-10-2012, 08:06 AM   #9
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I understand exactly how your feeling right now. I get people who know about my SI calling me things all the time and my parents also shouted at me. In fact last year I was kicked out of home and made homeless after being in hospital for a suicide attempt.
I do struggle to find distractions but I find what works for me is listening to music (not depressing stuff though!) and going for walks. Or just sitting with someone even someone you don't get on with you won't be able to hurt yourself if your sat with someone.
Sorry if these don't work for you I know how hard it is to distract yourself.

Stay Safe.

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Old 31-10-2012, 08:28 AM   #10
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play computer games ice cubes go somewhere safe and scream write things down listen dance sing to music talk to someone about it. play the ten minute game where you delay as long as you can





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Old 31-10-2012, 09:36 AM   #11
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Go for a run maybe? Exercise releases all of the extra energy built up in the body. Painting or drawing can also be a good distraction. Distractions seem to work best when they fit the person it's for. Is there anything you like to do that makes you feel completely calm and safe? A couple of times I've even painted red lines on my arms and legs, kind of like a placebo. That's another suggestion.

And no, I do not think it's stupid to harm yourself over a guy. Whatever our reasons are for hurting ourselves the point is we can't find another way to cope. Your dad shouldn't have spoken to you like that. It is so difficult to explain self harm to others (especially when the choice was taken away from you to explain it and someone is forcing you to).

Writing/journaling can help as well. It gets out all of those negative thoughts and feelings. This is actually going to sound really really stupid but when I feel extremely triggered, I put on Disney movies and sing along with the songs. It makes me feel safe like when I was a kid and distracts me because I usually end up laughing at how stupid I must look.

Well this probably wasn't much help but I hope you are feeling a little bit better/safer now.

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Old 31-10-2012, 03:48 PM   #12
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Music can help, or perhaps you can run a bath? Sometimes running a bath helps me forget everything.

I hope you find something that'll help.

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Old 31-10-2012, 06:54 PM   #13
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I've been dealing with wanting to cut for days. So far things that have helped me is blasting music as a distraction, writing up my feelings in a post or journal, taking a nice warm shower if im feeling stressed, hanging out with friends, and fangirling over favorite bands. Blasting music is my favorite cause if i use headphones and turn the volume up as high as my ears can take it, it'll push out everything save itself including whatever's making me want to cut.

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Old 02-11-2012, 06:12 PM   #14
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Quote:
Originally Posted by KariNicole View Post
I dont think its stupid at all. Whatever the cause - relationship problems, him making you feel bad about yourself, a breakup, etc - thats real pain and it shouldnt be demeaned like that. Your dad especially shouldn't be saying things like that. I know my mom did but looking back i think it was cause she was scared/worried for me and overreacting, even if it was hurtful stuff like 'its a middle schooler phase' or 'your a selfish little bitch' or 'you have nothing to be upset about, look what my life was like growing up'.

But anyways, in conclusion, yeah i dont think its pathetic at all. People shouldn't say stuff like that to you.

^

This. There are no "stupid" reasons to self-harm. If you're feeling bad enough to hurt yourself, that needs to be addressed. And your Dad had no right to call you names.

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Old 04-11-2012, 06:07 PM   #15
SayYou'llBeMyNightingale
 
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HELP MEE

do you think its stupid if i cut over a guy and people i know are calling me pathetic and saying im attention seeking when im not. one of my teachers found out at school and called my dad about it and he shouted at me, called me and idiot. but they dont understand, can someone please help me cos i just dont know what to do anymore. i have a very crappy life cos ive almost been killed, i was anarexic, belimic, i am dislexic, ive am bullied, im cutting and im 15 years old doing my GCSE's at school





I still think the world would be better off without me
Some people, when they hit rock bottom, they dont have that person in their lives to pick them back up
The mirror can lie, it doesnt show you whats on the inside.
I dont think im fixed, people think that your like a car in a body shop, you go in, they fix you and your out, you work like your brand new, it doesnt work like that at all
Sometimes i dont understand my self.
Im not strong enough and im tired of pretending i am.

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Old 04-11-2012, 06:07 PM   #16
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help me

do you think its stupid if i cut over a guy and people i know are calling me pathetic and saying im attention seeking when im not. one of my teachers found out at school and called my dad about it and he shouted at me, called me and idiot. but they dont understand, can someone please help me cos i just dont know what to do anymore. i have a very crappy life cos ive almost been killed, i was anarexic, belimic, i am dislexic, ive am bullied, im cutting and im 15 years old doing my GCSE's at school





I still think the world would be better off without me
Some people, when they hit rock bottom, they dont have that person in their lives to pick them back up
The mirror can lie, it doesnt show you whats on the inside.
I dont think im fixed, people think that your like a car in a body shop, you go in, they fix you and your out, you work like your brand new, it doesnt work like that at all
Sometimes i dont understand my self.
Im not strong enough and im tired of pretending i am.

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Old 04-11-2012, 06:08 PM   #17
SayYou'llBeMyNightingale
 
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help me

do you think its stupid if i cut over a guy and people i know are calling me pathetic and saying im attention seeking when im not. one of my teachers found out at school and called my dad about it and he shouted at me, called me and idiot. but they dont understand, can someone please help me cos i just dont know what to do anymore. i have a very crappy life cos ive almost been killed, i was anarexic, belimic, i am dislexic, ive am bullied, im cutting and im 15 years old doing my GCSE's at school





I still think the world would be better off without me
Some people, when they hit rock bottom, they dont have that person in their lives to pick them back up
The mirror can lie, it doesnt show you whats on the inside.
I dont think im fixed, people think that your like a car in a body shop, you go in, they fix you and your out, you work like your brand new, it doesnt work like that at all
Sometimes i dont understand my self.
Im not strong enough and im tired of pretending i am.

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Old 04-11-2012, 06:25 PM   #18
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Any significant upset that causes us distress is perfectly understandable to affect our mood and actions, however it might be worth looking at more constructive ways of coping with distress such as distraction techniques such as a long hot bath, a walk or run, punching a pillow, listening to music.



'Never forget what you are. The rest of the world will not. Wear it like armor, and it can never be used to hurt you.'

['There is only one thing we say to death. Not today'.']

'We are each our own devil, and we make this world our hell.’ – Oscar Wilde
‘It’s hard to dance with the devil on your back.’ Sydney Carter


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Old 04-11-2012, 06:39 PM   #19
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i stand by what i said when you posted this before. is there something more that you are looking for in response to this?




this is my magical medicine cabinet. Left to right they contain: courage, hope, calmness, and strength.

The magical part: They NEVER run out, so borrow some any time you want.



PM me anytime, I love getting messages :)
Katie


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Old 04-11-2012, 06:48 PM   #20
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you've posted this same thing at least 4 times now that i can find. what are you looking for from it? it isn't very considerate to repost the same thing so many times as other people need to be able to have their threads seen as well. and it doesn't really help you because people can't read each other's responses to avoid repeats and to build on each others ideas




this is my magical medicine cabinet. Left to right they contain: courage, hope, calmness, and strength.

The magical part: They NEVER run out, so borrow some any time you want.



PM me anytime, I love getting messages :)
Katie


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