Overwhelmed with just about everything
Hi,
I really don't know where to post this - i'm sorry if it's in the wrong place.
I was diagnosed with Anorexia at 13. I'm now 22 and still struggling. I've been under adult eating disorder services for nearly 6 years now. On top of the Anorexia, I also suffer with depression, anxiety, PTSD and various health complications.
My BMI is pretty low although it's difficult for me to see that. I have, however, been put on a lot of medication, all of which can cause weight gain. I'm on various anti-depressants, anti-psychotics, iron tablets, vitamins, Ad-Cal, and a back to back hormone pil for my gynaecological condition.
I weighed myself and my weight had increased. I don't know whether this is water retention from the pill, although this has distressed me greatly. I'm in a lot of pain and unable to exercise. I feel disgusted with myself. My mood has dropped drastically and my self harm has got worse. I am also taking constant pain relief and feel ever so unwell if I don't take them.
I feel so isolated with what's going on in my head. My parents are amazing and very supportive although I don't tend to tell them how I feel as I don't like them to worry about me. I have pretty distressing thoughts about harming myself (no one knows a bout this) and although I doubt i'll act on them, they still scare me. I fear one day, everything will get too much for me. So much has happened over the last 8/9 years, sometimes I don't see any other way out.
I was on 150mg Sertraline although the increase of 50mg made me feel absolutely terrible. I was exhausted and slept all day. It was decreased back to 100mg although it has helped the extremel tirdness, it has decreased my mood.
I hope it's okay to post this. I just feel so alone with my thoughts.
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