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Old 12-10-2015, 06:07 PM   #1
EyelinerAndCigarettes
 
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Feeling unsafe on mixed ward.

As probably you all know by the end of the month I'll be in hospital.
I'm feeling positive about it, but it's a mixed ward, with shared toilets & I'm convinced I'll get raped. More so, when I put weight on.
I know it's staffed, & I know no one would let any harm come to me, but it's still this uncontrollable fear that's putting me off going. It's made worse by the fact that my Mum knows someone who became pregnant while in the ward I'll be staying, she wasn't raped, but it just fuels my 'evidence' for why it would/will/could happen to me.
I think I'll be okay in the daytime, but at night time I'm afraid most. Obviously there isn't a lock on my door & although I need to be checked every 15 minutes, there's this, 'well, this person will have 15 minutes to rape you' in my head.

Any words of wisdom or experience would be useful.

x x x







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Old 12-10-2015, 06:49 PM   #2
mikey
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I will come back to this later but would it be an option for you to be on 1:1 obs at night? It's not fun, trust me, having someone sit there watching you but tt might make you feel a bit safer until you settle in and get to know people?
Be brave. You can do this. Everybody there will have their own fears and what I've found is that patients look out for each other.



There are, it has been said, two types of people in the world. There are those who, when presented with a glass that is exactly half full, say: 'This glass is half full'. And then there are those who say: 'This glass is half empty'.
The world belongs, however, to those who can look at the glass and say: 'What's up with this glass? Excuse me? Excuse me? This is my glass? I don't think so. My glass was full! And it was a bigger glass!

Terry Pratchett


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Old 12-10-2015, 07:12 PM   #3
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Have you discussed this fear with the team/professionals coordinating your admission? I am sure they would want to know about it in order to do whatever they can to support you to feel safe, because the safer you feel the more you'll be able to focus on recovery & treatment.

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Old 13-10-2015, 05:20 PM   #4
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Thank you all. My therapist is coming to see me the say I'm admitted so I will certainly talk to her.
As for to 1.1, I'm a bit afraid of asking incase they think I'm overreacting. Epic, I'll take any advice if it may be of help. I feel desperate to get past this & concentrate on my recovery.







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Old 13-10-2015, 05:24 PM   #5
mikey
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You wrote a brilliant reply to someone on the ED forum a while ago about this individual's fears of getting raped again as they gained weight. What you said was absolutely spot on and what you said seemed very genuine, so can you try and take in on board for yourself too?
Also, when I was in hospital they had a nurse call alarm next to the bed.
One more thing: when you get your weight up you'd be able to start self-defence classes, which would make you feel safer in general. I know you won't be able to do that in hospital probably but can you work towards it as a goal?


Last edited by mikey : 13-10-2015 at 05:28 PM. Reason: added something


There are, it has been said, two types of people in the world. There are those who, when presented with a glass that is exactly half full, say: 'This glass is half full'. And then there are those who say: 'This glass is half empty'.
The world belongs, however, to those who can look at the glass and say: 'What's up with this glass? Excuse me? Excuse me? This is my glass? I don't think so. My glass was full! And it was a bigger glass!

Terry Pratchett


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Old 13-10-2015, 05:47 PM   #6
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I can empathise a lot, I've been on several mixed wards.

I found confiding in the staff helpful. I have been unfortunate enough to come across some creepy men in my time but I've always felt protected by staff. Talking is the best way forward.

I also agree with Mikey - self defence classes are a good idea.




Imperfection is underrated.



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Old 13-10-2015, 05:54 PM   #7
EyelinerAndCigarettes
 
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Thank you both, I will talk to staff, its just hard to bring up, they will be informed on my past before I go in so I'm hoping they'll be empathetic. I would love to do self defense classes but because of my Fibromyalgia I am unable to, although I could buy a rape alarm & take it with me. You're right though, in order to be safer, & get the most out of the admission I do have to be open & honest the day I arrive. Maybe I will write what I want to say so if I feel too anxious to speak, at least I can hand it over to someone in charge as soon as I arrive. I know after every meal I'll be on 1.1 for I don't know how long, which on the first day, straight away, I know I will have time where I can talk to someone privately about my concerns/hand them a letter. It's also very comforting to hear there is nurse alarm too! I didn't even think of that!







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Old 13-10-2015, 08:00 PM   #8
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That's a good point, you've eased my fear. I know, in reality, that the chances of anything ever happening are 1 to a million, but it's doesn't seem to stop this cave-man response.

Thank you all for listening & for the reassurance, hugs & suggestions *squish*

I know what I need to do, I need to talk to staff, straight away & see what they come up with.

x x x







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